I'm the one that had the surgery, but my husband was very worried about "knowing what to do" when I came home. He was with me through the whole pre-op process, but about a week before he kind of freaked out. I agree with the suggestion that you need to know his diet restrictions, especially if you do the majority of food shopping. Another adjustment for us as a couple has been that for now, we can't really go to restaurants like we used to. Me having this surgery has really pointed out how much of our together time revolved around dining and drink. This was truly the main way we socialized with friends and with each other. We're still adjusting to this, but overall the changes have been good. You might have to redefine the things you enjoy doing together, or modify them, especially the first 6 months. I'm pretty independant and I didn't want him over my shoulder monitoring my food and drink, but there is definitely open communication and I keep him aware of how I am feeling or handling certain foods.

I'm a future patient myself, and I need some advice along the same lines. I will be spending most of the time at my parents' house, with my parents, my younger sister, her infant son, and sometimes his father (in a very small space). They are all so focused on their own lives/drama that I don't know how to get through that there are certain things that I need, too. Like sometimes it's a challenge to get 5 minutes to eat, so I don't know when I would be able to get 30 minutes in. Or that when my hormones are all out of whack it would be really helpful if they treated each other nicely and didn't behave like juveniles. Or for that matter, how to get them to realize that every audible sigh, frustrated tone, or quiet or bad mood is not a personal attack.