Chapter 4

Options
Chapter 4 was tough for me. I have struggled with relationships and do not have many close girlfriends. I just have a few casual friends, and my family. I did ask one friend before starting this study to join myfitnesspal with me, but she never responded, and I have spoken to her a few times since then. Maybe I even offended her. I am very hesitant to ask anyone else because they may think "Oh, you think I'm fat? You're asking me to lose weight." Again, I don't have really close girlfriends.

So I am really hoping this group can be just that. The support system of Christian friends that I need to make it on this journey. Can we all count on each other for that?

Replies

  • JanetC1971
    JanetC1971 Posts: 6 Member
    Options
    I completely understand what you mean about having close girlfriends. God has blessed me with 3 close girlfriends after years and years of being burned, taken advantage of and flaked out on. I pray that God blesses you with a close girlfriend. I am still closed off and I still don't ask for help when I need it, but I'm working on it and praying about it.

    I'm here for you!
  • amytalbott3
    Options
    I haven't read chapter 4 yet. But the idea of accountability is a tough one for me too. I have a very critical mother who is harsh and condemning when it comes to my health journey. She tells me all I am doing wrong and criticizes how big I have gotten. There is no encouragement there at all.
    On the other side of the coin, other friends just don't want to be accountable. I have also invited people to join MFP too, and they get started then drop off (as I have done several times) but when I follow up with them, they are annoyed and frustrated with me.

    It is a challenging and tender area for all of us I believe. But I do have an example of someone who did it right. I met a lady through twitter and MFP and she has been such an encouragement to me. When I dropped off she just check up on me a few times but it was gentle and kind, and not harassing. I wasn't ready to jump back in to MFP at the time, but it kept it all in the back of my head. It really was encouraging for me and really helpful. So I think one way we can learn to handle this accountable thing is to be open to people checking in on us, and then also learning to be gentle and loving when we check in on others.

    I honestly believe the women I have found here are in a place that they want to be encouraged and they need that kind and gentle support so it will be easier to give it. I am so thankful to have found women who can be that in a safe way.
    Thank you ladies. This journey can be so hard, so discouraging, and so lonely at times. We do need each other. We do need the encouragement.
    Keep up the good work,
    And Thank you.
    Amy
  • janiceesmith12
    janiceesmith12 Posts: 29 Member
    Options
    I am so glad I found this group. I was reading today's blog and trying to figure out how to answer our question. I do want an accountability partner, but don't have anyone that comes to mind to ask. My husband is always supportive, but he has no way to understand cravings, emotional eating, etc.

    If any of you want to work on accountablilty, please let me know. I need a partner on this journey.
  • reba020
    reba020 Posts: 55 Member
    Options
    I too am looking to this group to be my accountability partners. I am so glad I found this study and group!!
  • 3TaylorBoys
    3TaylorBoys Posts: 1 Member
    Options
    Hi everyone - just found this group - hooray!

    This chapter is a good one for me. I have a hard time asking for help from people and am usually the capable and strong one. :) Ha! What a joke! If only people could see how I struggle and am so ashamed and insecure!! I feel the online forums and support is so helpful for me. Somehow the "anonymity" makes it easier to be more open. Not sure what that says about me in general (!) but for me, online support is making a big difference. I also am new to MyFitnessPal but am really liking it. I had no idea there were message boards til I found the website. Have a great day - I am hoping to stay the course and depend on God's strength today and not my own.

    Amy
  • AngiKell
    AngiKell Posts: 19 Member
    Options
    Hi Everyone!

    So I've sent each of you friend requests. I was in denial as I read Chap. 4 until she made those points at the end. Then I had to agree that the only reason I succeed is because I'm accountable to someone. Over a year ago I found an exercise buddy on Nexercise and now I exercise 5 days a week because I don't want to let her down.

    So now, in that same spirit, I join all of you. Please feel free to contact me if you don't see the message that I've completed my daily diary. And if any of you are also on Kik, I'd like to connect with you there also. I think of Kik as my kick in the pants to get me going. (My Nexercise buddy uses Kik to nudge me.)

    And I pray for all of us. I pray that we remember to look to God when we are craving and need strength. Have a wonderful day!
  • shannonalgren1
    shannonalgren1 Posts: 36 Member
    Options
    I chose to have friends hold me accountable. I need to share my failures as well as my victories. And I hope the victories encourage someone else.
  • Gingercj1960
    Gingercj1960 Posts: 1 Member
    Options
    Accountability is very difficult for me as well. In the past when I have asked for help in this area, I never receive encouragement only condemnation when they see me make not so wise choices. So I don't ask. Hoping being in this group will give me some of the accountability I need.
  • mickeyksu
    mickeyksu Posts: 16 Member
    Options
    I'm IN for accountability and encouragement! Keep logging and posting-I need you all, too!!

    Heather
  • jerilynbeth
    jerilynbeth Posts: 1 Member
    Options
    Hey ladies! I'm so excited that I found this group! This is my 3rd time going through made to crave and I just love it! I'm really looking forward to going through this journey with all of you. I'm very excited about being a part of a group who will hold each other accountable for eating to live and not living to eat! I have my food diary on my fitness pal open to the public so if any of you want to look at it daily to make sure I'm not cheating, then feel free! I hope everyone has a wonderful day eating in obedience to God!
  • jazzymom07
    jazzymom07 Posts: 4 Member
    Options
    Excited to find this group!
    I've used myfitness pal several times. And have deleted the app several times. I tried to find accountability partners but either they make fun of the idea- maybe because they don't have problems, or some don't want to share this journey for fear they are posting too much personal online. Then there's the husband that says he wants to do it, but 2 days later when we are out running errands and starving he says he feels like Taco Bell or going for margaritas (aka chips and everything else!). I have never been able to say NO please lets not go there. I always put him or my daughter first.

    So today I added a bunch of friends from the blog on M2C and I'm so excited. I just made my first green drink while my husband and daughter made pigs in a blanket and devoured them. That smell was killing me but I did it ;) I didn't want to come log pigs in a blanket on my food diary!! We are stuck inside all day with the houston snow storm (ha!) so we shall see how the rest of the day goes.

    Thank you to each of you for being here and prayers for all of us!

    Lisa
  • brownielar
    Options
    I so get that. We can be there for each other. We can do this thru Christ!!
  • amytalbott3
    Options
    Lisa,
    Can I tell you how much I love your comment, " I don't want to log pigs in a blanket." Can I tell you how much I can relate to that statement. To the point that at times in the past I just didn't log certain foods. (Not an honest way to handle things :( But I want to do better now as well) So last night I logged my toast and jelly that I shouldn't have eaten. -- my current goals are mostly focused on reducing sugar.

    Hang in there. I will work on not eating the fresh bread I made today. You work on your goals. Ok? We can do this. What are your goals right now?
    hang in there. We have Determination.
    Amy
  • AngiKell
    AngiKell Posts: 19 Member
    Options
    So today I added a bunch of friends from the blog on M2C and I'm so excited. I just made my first green drink while my husband and daughter made pigs in a blanket and devoured them. That smell was killing me but I did it ;) I didn't want to come log pigs in a blanket on my food diary!!

    Regarding embarrassing food diary entries:

    So I just had to log in a Costco hot dog. However, this is also the day I have an hour yoga class. So I made a deal with myself that I would definitely go to that class to make up for it. I really didn't have a choice with the dog. I looked up the calories beforehand and was going to do the Chicken Caesar Salad instead, but found out that it's 110 more calories then the hot dog! And the hot dog would keep me full all afternoon where the salad wouldn't. So hot dog it was. (BTW, it was a company errand and my co-workers who I went with insisted on eating at Costco. Ok, yea, I could have gone and got something healthier afterwards. But by then I would have been starving.)
  • grandnana931
    Options
    I'm so glad to have found this group. Asking for help and accountability is extremely hard for me. You see I am a perfectionist and if I don't do it perfectly then I might as well not do it. My husband is a great help but he doesn't really understand how unhappy I am with the way I look. He says I look beautiful, but after almost 40 years of marriage and a 100 extra pounds I really don't feel beautiful. So happy I found the M2C bible study, even though I am a little behind but catching up and I am even more thankful that I found all of you. Would love to help support people and would love people to support me and hold me accountable.

    Debi
  • hagood01
    hagood01 Posts: 7 Member
    Options
    Just found this group-saw a post on the facebook study tonight! Keep strong girls...you can do this! I lost my weight this summer and fall...my struggle now is to maintain. For me that is harder than losing. I must exercise every day to keep it off...right now I am highly motivated, but I know that will change.
    This is the second time I have gone through the book, and daily I find new insights.
    Marie
  • raquelannn
    Options
    Being accountable to someone is really important if I am going to succeed. The food log on here is good, too - it keeps me from eating things because, like y'all have said, who wants to log icky food!
    I also do not have many close friends - though my husband is encouraging he also can not see how unhappy my weight makes me and says I look beautiful. Ugh - like he can't see all the fat, seriously!?! lol Anyway, I'm thankful that my daughter loaded the my fitness pal app to my phone. Now I must get on the computer more often because I am missing these posts from you all!!!! I neeeeed all the support I can get.
    As we go into the weekend and the Super Bowl - I'll be praying for all us to be empowered and to stay determined!
  • gobigred5898
    gobigred5898 Posts: 6 Member
    Options
    It looks like I'm a couple of weeks behind everyone else in finding this group. I like it because it's a lot more intimate than the 43,000 and way easier to keep track of everyone and to keep each other accountable.

    I only have one really close friend and she's in the study with us, but she's just too busy right now to really commit. I have another kind of close friend at work, and she's supportive but she's probably not going to be able to hold me accountable.

    So I'm counting on all of you for the next 60 lbs. and you can count on me, too. I like the post about checking in - when we do, we need to be loving to our sisters and not take offense when someone gives us a nudge. It's all coming from a place of love and concern. I'm going to send each of you a friend request - let's stay strong!