Well, I think that everyone is different. Very restrictive diets can definitely trigger binges, and not eating adequate calories. That's why I eat back most of my exercise calories, like MFP's plan, I can't do 1,200 calorie diets - too low for my activity, anyways.

I have never met a binge eater who hasn't dieted in their past.

Some people find the only way to stop their binges is to eat at maintenance calories, some find they can cut their calories for weight loss - but still include small treats, so they feel they aren't restricted too much.
Others find they can have small calorie deficits (like 200) and slowly lose their weight while avoiding binges (because they're keeping their calories fairly high, but still below maintenance)
Some even find calorie counting as a trigger, and they go to intuitive eating for awhile, or for life.

You really just have to find what works for you. It's easy to slide back into restrictive eating if I see weight loss, I find balance hard. I either want to diet strict or binge. I'm still working on finding my balance. Some days I seem to have it down, other days not so much. But hey, with normal eaters, they sometimes overeat, and sometimes they forget a meal... it's not the end of the world. :flowerforyou:

I've mostly been binge free for a while, it's taken a lot of trial and error.
My new goal is 1550 cal a day net, my bmr is 1444, so I'm pretty close to that. If I exercise then I eat back.
I have been improving my nutrition hugely and I attribute that towards helping get rid of binges, I think deficiency in nutrients is what created binges for me. I used to eat tons of junk and sugar, I've mostly even gotten rid of my sweet tooth.
good luck, This has taken me a while, I'd say half a year to figure out what's good for me.
A buddy on MFP stressed to stop the diet mentality, I started dieting in the 2nd grade, always was chubby then disordered in my eating.
So I agree to stop dieting, I know it's not easy for those of us that have tried many diets, but at least for me none worked.
The restriction def fueled my binges, plus I feel defincies in nutrients.

I can only tell you what has worked for me, and I am not a doctor.

After dropping the first 30-40 pounds, maintaining a 500 cal/day deficit for me was no longer sustainable and I would inevitably binge after a week or two. I know 500/day is what most people on MFP like, but I just felt too deprived, and I would binge. The vicious cycle you reference.

At first I was resistant to switching to a smaller deficit because I didn't want weight loss to take so long! But after so many binge/restrict cycles I realized that it was going to take just as long, if not longer, with all the bingeing.

So now I eat at a 200-250 calorie deficit and have done so for the last 15ish pounds. Yes, it's slow, but the weight is still coming off and my urges to binge have been reduced by 95%.

Don't be so hard on yourself. If you can't do it on 1200 calories a day, don't keep trying to make it work! Madness is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. As you say, it is normal to have urges to binge after restricting. So restrict LESS - just to have a small deficit.