Overeaters Anonymous (OA)

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Brandybeayon
Brandybeayon Posts: 51 Member
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Wonderful day today.... I have 3 beautiful kids and I feed them healthy all the time BUT Wednesdays my oldest has to be to school early and so I bring my middle to the doughnut shop to pick out a treat before school... all year we have done this she would pick out a donut and I would pick out one, then I would get 1/2 dozen or even a dozen and say well my husband will want one, my daughter and son that missed out should get one.. I would eat mine in the car and sometimes sneak another from the box.. I would even imagine in my head excuses to tell my husband.. Oh they must have counted wrong or I gave Ayla an extra one.. All this and he doesnt even know about the one I picked out just for me.... So then I would go home he would have a donut or two as he was eating his I thought ahhh I can have another one too.. sooo I did... Some mornings I would eat 5 donuts within an hour.. Then I would go back to bed!! wake up around noon and sometime,,,, many times,, I would eat the ones I had saved for my kids. each wednesday doughnut day I would lay in bed thinking is tonight the night I will have a heart attack? I would think I can not do this again!! yet the following wednesday I could barely wait to walk in the shop and see what they had...
Last wednesday I sent my husband and asked him not to bring any home, Today I brought her myself and you know what? I had no urge! m sure it will be there some days BUT for today I was happy and did not even consider.. I have talked with my kids though and we decided we can all do without Wednesday doughnuts:) We will have strawberry banana slushies instead!!


Today was week 2 day 4 or Zumba and I can already feel myself improving!

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  • blackthrux
    blackthrux Posts: 58 Member
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    ... I had no urge! m sure it will be there some days BUT for today I was happy and did not even consider....

    YAY! This is a spectacular feeling, isn't it? I thought I would have a hard time with this, but I'm finding that most days I don't have the urge to binge on my triggers either. I'm glad that I'm not the only one that can experience that, since it feels like such a fantastic shift in behavior.

    Congratulations on making it through yesterday, keep on going one day at a time!
  • GrokRockStar
    GrokRockStar Posts: 2,938 Member
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    For a COE going into a donut shop is like an alcoholic going into a bar. It's a good idea that you've nixed donut Wednesdays and opted for a healthier version, although I’m not sure of your trigger foods.
  • Brandybeayon
    Brandybeayon Posts: 51 Member
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    I am honestly still learning about trigger foods , My meeting here only has 4-5 people and one sponsor so I have not asked yet. reading some material though I would say sweet breakfast confections is a deffinate trigger food for me.. My hardest trigger food to let go of is Pizza, i swear I lay in bed dreaming about it, I know myself and if I have one piece It would just be worse So I am no more pizza.. which is hard because I have 3 kids and a hubby that love it!! we usually have it about 1 time a week.. and for a normal person it can actually be a healthy food but for me it s not so I am abstaining from it...
  • GrokRockStar
    GrokRockStar Posts: 2,938 Member
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    Brandy, you don't have to wait for a sponsor to do this exercise, just sit down in a quiet place and write out which foods have caused you to binge or could potentially lead to a binge. I also try omit foods that have no nutritional value. Try to spend at least 15 mins on it, then go off and do something else. I have a long list of trigger foods, some that I wasn't aware of until I got deeper into program. We have a disease of the mind, and like you, I've had obsessions over pizza, where I thought I would go nuts if I didn't eat it. I've gone through 4 fast food drive-throughs on the way home from work, then made at ate a healthy dinner when I got home. The obsession will eventually be quiet, but will never fully go away. It's harder for you because you have a family that likes some of your trigger foods. Either you're gonna have to come up with some alternatives (depending on your food plan), then introduce your family to a different way of thinking and eating, or fall deeper into the disease. I'm lucky to have a partner who understands addiction and recovery, so he is careful to make sure those foods do not enter our home. For me it's literally life or death.

    Hang in there, and if you ever need to reach out, please message me. I still have struggles, but the tools help me through it, sometimes barely.
  • Smeltzer2
    Smeltzer2 Posts: 210 Member
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    Today is my anniversary of keeping 70 lbs off for 11 years. I had an eating disorder for 54 years from age 9 to 60. On April 11, 2003 i asked God to make a normal eater out of me. I am 71. In between the binges, purges, diets, laxatives i had three stents put in my heart, have diabetes, and kidney disease, and never felt my feelings. When I asked God to help me he did. Never thought to ask him. I used to eat a dozen donuts and three full meals that a,family of five could have eaten in a few days. I never felt my felt my feelings. The day after I asked God to help me I starred Oa and went for many years. Got a sponsor and worked,the 12 steps. I ate three meals a day with nothing in between i Hope you can work the steps. I gave up cakes, candy, pie, cookies donuts, ice cream becausei wanted to. I obsessed food for 54 years. Lost out on lots in life because all I thought was food. Who did this for me, God. He can, he will, good luck. You will do this.
  • GrokRockStar
    GrokRockStar Posts: 2,938 Member
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    Today is my anniversary of keeping 70 lbs off for 11 years. I had an eating disorder for 54 years from age 9 to 60. On April 11, 2003 i asked God to make a normal eater out of me. I am 71. In between the binges, purges, diets, laxatives i had three stents put in my heart, have diabetes, and kidney disease, and never felt my feelings. When I asked God to help me he did. Never thought to ask him. I used to eat a dozen donuts and three full meals that a,family of five could have eaten in a few days. I never felt my felt my feelings. The day after I asked God to help me I starred Oa and went for many years. Got a sponsor and worked,the 12 steps. I ate three meals a day with nothing in between i Hope you can work the steps. I gave up cakes, candy, pie, cookies donuts, ice cream becausei wanted to. I obsessed food for 54 years. Lost out on lots in life because all I thought was food. Who did this for me, God. He can, he will, good luck. You will do this.

    Hey, Happy Birthday and thank you for sharing your experience! I look forward to the day when I have celebrated years of abstinence! I take comfort in knowing that we are not alone and share a common goal in addressing this disease. The answer truly is calling on our higher power to lighten the load and trusting the process. Thanks for the reminder.
  • Brandybeayon
    Brandybeayon Posts: 51 Member
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    You have no idea how amazing it is to come here and see peoples stories that are s much like mine...(well maybe you do know!!!)
    You all inspire me so much and I can not believe it took me so long to find OA
  • blackthrux
    blackthrux Posts: 58 Member
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    Hey, Happy Birthday and thank you for sharing your experience! I look forward to the day when I have celebrated years of abstinence! I take comfort in knowing that we are not alone and share a common goal in addressing this disease. The answer truly is calling on our higher power to lighten the load and trusting the process. Thanks for the reminder.

    I really can't say it any better than GrokRockStar.
    You have no idea how amazing it is to come here and see peoples stories that are s much like mine...(well maybe you do know!!!)
    You all inspire me so much and I can not believe it took me so long to find OA

    Hey Brandy, as a fairly new person here myself, I still feel exactly what you are saying here. To realize that I wasn't alone in what I was doing and feeling was liberating in and of itself. To see that those that have come before me have found a way through to a more peaceful existence and a fuller life? Well, that's just plain exciting!

    I don't think it matters how long it took any of us to find OA. I think what matters is what we do with it, now that we're here.
  • swissmardi
    swissmardi Posts: 57 Member
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    i swear I lay in bed dreaming about it, I know myself and if I have one piece It would just be worse
    Exactly these words heard in '93 kept me coming back… Someone else spoke my language. Another person had the same thoughts that I did… My mind is tricky and food does call to me. Just last night, I had just finished eating dinner and I kept thinking about food. "What can I eat? "Should I have a smoothie?" "What's in the cupboard for me to munch on?" I was actually coming home from a meeting. I got into contact with my HP, then I said the first 3 steps, and lo and behold, I started thinking about something else. Sometimes it's not about putting the thoughts away as it is accepting them and moving through, whether they go away or not...
    I find it fantastic that you shared your experience, strength, and hope here. Keep on...
  • GrokRockStar
    GrokRockStar Posts: 2,938 Member
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    Just last night I had an obsession about a cupcake (my ultimate trigger), and it stayed with me for hours. I had to have that cupcake, even if it meant sneaking out and getting it. I said the serenity prayer a dozen times, read passages in the big book, wrote out step 1, attempted to work through it with my spouse who has been sponsoring addicts for over 33 years, nothing helped!! Arghhhh, it was a tough night, but by the grace of my higher power, I got through it and was able to remain abstinent. I haven’t had a craving such as this in a good while, so maybe I was becoming complacent and let my guard down. It was a harsh reminder that I am a COE and will always be one, even if the obsession seems to quiet.

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