Welcome and Introduction

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julieworley376
julieworley376 Posts: 444 Member
I will go first. Welcome, I look forward to meeting others locked in the same struggle I am fighting. I am 56 years old and have been losing and gaining weight for 50 years now. It is heartbreaking, soul destroying, health ruining, I have found myself wondering what on earth I did to deserve this. But I need to get rid of the guilt of not solving the problem, because guilt won't make me healthy. Faced with increasing health issues, arthritis, walking problems, breathing issues, a stretched left ventricle and bloating I felt despair till my son sent me here and challenged me.

Listen, no one can help you, there is no magic pill or diet, the only one who can help you is YOU. But it won't hurt to surround ourselves with others.

I understand there will be negativity here, there has to be while people explore their emotions and feelings, but let's try to lighten the path for each other and ultimately lighten the load on our bodies.
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Replies

  • michelleneli
    michelleneli Posts: 132 Member
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    Hi, I'm Michelle. I'm 5'6" and 327 lbs. I've been over 200 lbs since I was 29 and over 300 for a little over a year. I'm 46 with 17and 15 year old sons and 1 cat. I've been on MFP for awhile but am just starting to get serious. The last time I was at my goal weight was when I was 18.:noway:
  • Yana220
    Yana220 Posts: 53 Member
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    Hello!

    In 1997, I decided to start taking better care of myself. Earlier that year I lost my grandmother to diabetes after watching her suffer for over a year with complications to the disease. Then I went to the hospital due to an eye infection and they had to weigh me in triage. I weighed in at 350 lbs. I don't know if that was my actual weight because the scale would only go up to 350. I was 19, and knew that I had to make some changes.

    I started small - stopped eating fast food, stopped drinking soda, and walked to all of my classes instead of using the campus shuttle. I suppose because of age, just those few things helped me to shed weight quickly. By spring 1999, I weighed in at 186 - the lightest I weighed since I was in middle school.

    However, as often happens, I wasn't able to maintain my weight loss. I moved to another state miles away from friends and family, started a new school, and moved into a dorm. The meals in the dining hall cut off at 7 and not being able to make my own meals after my late evening classes and work, I gained several pounds back quickly through eating take out and not exercising anymore. I went from a svelte size 12 (I'm 5'11 so I looked much smaller) to a size 14 in one semester. By 2001, I was back in a size 18. Now I'm in a size 22 where I have been for the past six years.

    No matter how much my weight fluctuated over the years, I swore to myself that I would never allow myself to get back into the 300's. I'm teetering just on the edge of that number now (288), and while I'm terrified of going over, I feel empowered because I know exactly what to do to get the weight off.

    I'm logging on here again daily (second attempt at this), and I workout most days of the week. You may laugh, but I've been enjoying my very retro 1980's workouts that are dance-y and fun. I will keep this up until I get bored with them. It gets me moving everyday, so they can't be that bad. :)

    I've been through the stages of anger, fear, depression, and isolation that being morbidly obese brings. Now I'm hopeful. I know that I'm doing the right things and can see the light at the end of the tunnel. I'm not going to see progress immediately, and I don't expect to. I am eating better and exercising more because I know that it's good for me. I am currently 17 pounds away from no longer being considered morbidly obese for my height, and I'm working very hard to make that happen.

    Please feel free to add me as a friend! :)
  • julieworley376
    julieworley376 Posts: 444 Member
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    You were at your goal weight Michelle! That's awesome! I have never been at my goal weight, well, I might have been before I became a teen? We can do this, we can. I will be posting things I think will help, and some questions to help people explore and for us to get to know each other. Thanks for being here!
  • julieworley376
    julieworley376 Posts: 444 Member
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    Very happy to have you here Yana! This is the kind of story I expect those morbidly obese to have, the ups and downs, the learning and slipping. One of the things I want to encourage is doing those very small things, because those small things add up to bigger ones.

    I went on a walk around the parking ramp in my lunch hour and it was tough. I came back thinking, is this how normal people feel? This awful pain in the front of my legs? Or do I just accept it as something that is normal? Then I thought.. scratch normal.. we ARE normal people, think healthy weight people, I would bet they don't hurt just getting up and moving round the room. Being morbidly obese means huge efforts. I want to see us put those monumental efforts into becoming healthy weight people and really living.
  • CristinaVonAlva13
    CristinaVonAlva13 Posts: 12 Member
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    My name is Cristina I am going to be 23 years old in May. I am 265 pounds and my height is 5'4 and wish to lose weight to be healthier and to feel comfortable about myself. My whole life I struggled with dieting and I actually lost 20 pounds last year with mfp but gained 10 pounds back. I would love to be around 145lbs. I am tired of struggling with gaining weight. When I feel stressed about anything I tend to do emotional eating. My problem is getting the motivation to workout also I would love some support or if anyone needs support from me I am here :) Please add me if you would like to you.
  • scubasuenc
    scubasuenc Posts: 626 Member
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    Technically I'm no longer morbidly obese, but I have been much of my life, so I'd like to still be a part of this group.

    My name is Sue. I'm 47, 5'5" and currently weigh 233lbs. I always thought I was heavy as a kid, but looking back at photographs I really wasn't. However when I was 15 we moved and I was miserable. I put on about 80 lbs that year and hit about 220lbs. There was no attempt in the family to understand and deal with why I was miserable and eating that way, just that I was fat and needed to go on a diet. Through high school and college I dieted off and on, but I never really lost the weight. By 1997 I was 333 and in desperation I had my stomach stapled. I lost 80 lbs, but slowly put it back on again with several other periods of yo-yo up and down. Oct 2013 I was 310 when I joined MFP.

    I joined MFP at my doctor's recommendation. I am a type 2 diabetic, my blood sugar was out of control and my doctor suggested I consider revision bariatric surgery. She said failure of the early methods was not uncommon but that the science has improved and I should thing about surgery. I did a lot of reading about why bariatric surgery fails and the risks associated with another surgery. I decided I wanted to try to lose weight with diet and exercise, but realized I needed some accountability. My doctor has used MFP herself to lose quite a bit of weight and she said she would provide accountability for me, if I would log my food and exercise. It is now 6 months later and I'm 76 lbs lighter. I now weigh less than I did after the bariatric surgery.

    For me it has never been an education thing. I've known what I need to eat and how to exercise. It is a psychological thing. There is a battle going on every day to keep me from sliding back into old comfortable habits, and I have to remind myself that those habits led to a life I do not want to have again.

    I get up each morning and set myself 2 goals. (1) eat under my calorie limit (2) exercise at least 30 minutes. I only have to be 'good' today. If I string enough good days together I will make progress.
  • julieworley376
    julieworley376 Posts: 444 Member
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    Hi Christina. Exercise is so much harder for us, but you are young which really helps. Baby steps. Really. Walk across the room if that is all you can do, then walk back. Or walk a few houses, and back. Or the block if you can. Look around at the kind of things you would like to be involved in, Zumba? Bike riding? Hiking in parks? Dance exercise? Swimming? There is so much out there but I think we put limits upon ourselves because it seems so monumental to get there.
  • Yana220
    Yana220 Posts: 53 Member
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    Being morbidly obese means huge efforts. I want to see us put those monumental efforts into becoming healthy weight people and really living.

    This really resonates with me. What a great message, Julie!
  • julieworley376
    julieworley376 Posts: 444 Member
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    Oh yes yes YES on the psychological and emotional.. sorry forgot to mention that part Christina, I am an emotional eater and a sugar addict.. something else I will tackle later.
  • CristinaVonAlva13
    CristinaVonAlva13 Posts: 12 Member
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    I agree completely I will start walking today when I get off from work!
  • debunny34
    debunny34 Posts: 97 Member
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    Hello to you all. I am Debbie, and I am definitely in the obese category. I am 43 years old, 5'2" and as of this morning, 318 pounds. My husband and I got married 4 years ago and I was 173 pounds( after losing about 80 pounds ), so needless to say I have gained ALOT in a short time. A lot of mine was emotional eating to begin with. I lost my job the week before we were married, and then the month after we got custody of his defiant teenage son with ADHD and a police record already. These past 4 years have been a roller coaster for us. He retired from the military 2 years ago and then we moved for a job for him away from my family to another state; therefore more emotional eating. I am tired of being tired. Sunday he and I both decided we had had enough and started our eating lifestyle changes, lol if I call it a diet he will not stick with it :). We have both gained alot of weight, though he has only gained about 60 pounds, still alot, but not as much as me. I worry though because I have no support system here where we live. We honestly do not get out much or have many friends so we are home bodies. I did get up enough energy today to go to the gym here in our housing area and exercised for about 30 minutes. One day down and many more still to go :). I am trying to focus on eating better, no white breads and pastas and sugars, and trying to at least incorporate more movement in my days. Honestly, exercising hurts like crazy on my ankles and knees, but I know I am going to just have to push through it, at least in small doses until my body gets used to moving more. I worry that I will have a heart attack and my kids and grand-daughters wont have me around anymore. LOL well now that I have put my life story out there I guess I will close it. I hope to get to know you all better and maybe we can all be there to support one another. It helps knowing there are others out there in the same boat, and know how hard it is to even make an effort to exercise.
  • lkrause1997
    lkrause1997 Posts: 1 Member
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    Hi! My name is Laura and I have struggled with my weight my entire adult life. I am 37 years old and 260 pounds. My goal weight is 130 and I know I will need all of the support I can get to arrive at that goal.
    Thankfully, I have a wonderful support system at home and am surrounded by people who want me to succeed.
    My faith also plays a huge part in helping me know I can do this.
    Phillipians 4:13: I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. This is my life verse.

    I struggle with emotional eating for sure. Happy, sad, angry....I eat during them all.
    I've tried every weight loss program out there with tiny successes, but no lasting ones.
    So I bought a bike, a 5lb weight and a walking dvd and am ready to get this thing going.
    I'm starting tomorrow with tracking what I eat and my exercise.

    Can't wait to be healthy.

    Laura
  • Kourui
    Kourui Posts: 32 Member
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    Hello

    I've been using myfitnesspal on and off for a while through my phone only. This app has been a tremendous help in figuring out what's really in our food. This is my first time browsing through the forums though.

    I just turned 31 this month, around 340 pounds. More top and front heavy. Despite the big body, I have a small stomach. Restaurants are a bane due to the large portions they serve. I've been struggling with my weight all through my twenties. Poor eating habits due to laziness, various exercise attempts, mystery illnesses, all while working full time and going to school part time. I too have suffered loss and gained love.
    But I am a firm believer in a few big facts:
    - Diets don't work
    - Real food will make you healthy from the inside out
    - Don't moan over falling off the wagon, just pick yourself back up again

    For the past few years I've been working on lifestyle changes slowly. Because it's easier to manage. For example, at my doctors suggestion, I should go gluten free. Going cold turkey lasted 2 weeks. But now I slowly replace my favorite foods with gluten free alternatives. Once I found a suitable one, I never go back to the old version.

    Now I'm what the grocery industry refers to as the "perimeter shopper". Meaning I only go to the produce, meat and dairy section (no bakery!) and only go into the center aisles for specific things such as rice, sauces, etc.

    Right now, I'm on holidays so my husband and I will be doing a juicing reboot :drinker: (see Joe Cross's Fat, Sick & Nearly Dead documentary). We're on day two and doing ok. I had a cheese craving :sad: last night but my husband helped me get past it. It'll either be 3 or 5 days depending on how long we feel like doing it. We're used to juicing our breakfasts but this will be the first time doing it for a full day over several days.

    For those wondering if this is a diet, it actually isn't because a diet means going into starvation mode so you don't get what your body needs. What the juicing reboot does is you're still getting all the vitamins and minerals your body needs through fruits and vegetables only (yes protein too!) but it's in liquid form so it's easier on your digestive system to handle (perfect for those of us suffering from various forms of IBS and other digestive related illnesses or diseases).

    I don't know if I'd consider myself an emotional eater. But a boredom eater definitely. Now that spring is slowly starting here, I can't wait to get on my bike and get out more. Plus my local outdoor pool is offering free admission for the summer. I'll be done school after 3 intense years of a double program.

    Summer goal - get outside more for biking and swimming. Continue with healthy eating habits.
    Winter goal - find more activities to do so I'm not sitting on my *kitten* when it gets -40 degrees out. Continue with healthy eating habits. Try to get more swimming in for the winter.
  • julieworley376
    julieworley376 Posts: 444 Member
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    YIKES! -40? I had trouble with -20 this winter. I love biking too but I am afraid to get on my bike right now in case I break it. I think the weight limit is 270lbs.

    I love love LOVE your philosophy and I would like to learn more about the juicing. I think if there is anything I can take away from all of these years it is those small changes I have made. Like you I am now a perimeter shopper, it can be very difficult to find foods low enough in sodium my body can tolerate them and processed certainly isn't the way to go.
  • BodyByChipsAhoy
    BodyByChipsAhoy Posts: 60 Member
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    Hello! Just joined today. I am 5'3" and about 278 pounds last time I checked. I have two very important reasons for being here: I turn 40 in 3 days and want to give myself the ultimate birthday gift of better health. And the 2nd, and most important, is my son who just turned 1! Right now, he is too little to mirror my food choices, so I need to get a handle on myself now. I would rather die than to have him follow my path of being overweight my whole life. And I want to be able to be active with him. He is already so strong and is starting to walk and is very active and I am going to need to be able to keep up with him. I don't want him to miss out on having a mom who can do everyday things. I dont want him to have to ride a rollercoaster by himself because I don't fit. Simple everyday things like that that people of a healthy weight dont have to think about.

    I was doing well food wise right before I got pregnant with my son. I was 255, which was the lowest weight I had been for years. (I briefly topped out around 300 back in 2004-ish, but typically stay somewhere between 260-280). So I got pregnant and gained 32 pounds. More than the doctor wanted me to gain, but still not the end of the world. I lost every last pound by the time he was 6 weeks old. Then I started trying on work clothes. Everyone always says your body changes after pregnancy, but I figured since I was obese anyway, I would just go back to where I had been. It was a shocking blow to me that I couldnt fit into any of my clothes, even though I had lost all the weight. This was part of what started me on a several month PopTart and Oreo binge that resulted in me gaining almost all 32 pounds back. I was also home alone all day with my son from 4 weeks-12 weeks and he was struggling with reflux and a dairy allergy so sometimes he would scream and cry much of the day and wasnt sleeping well. It was hard to take him places because he was constantly melting down. It was a very stressful period in my life and I am, and always have been, an emotional eater. Because I had to go dairy free myself because I was breastfeeding, a lot of my go-to healthy snacks (cheese, yogurt) were no longer an option. And because he was so high-needs, I couldnt put him down so I subsisted on easy to eat things like PopTarts and Oreos. So much has changed since then. My son is the light of my life. He is happy, laid back, independent, smart and a complete joy and blessing. My husband and I can't remember life without him.

    As my son has gotten easier, a lot of my challenge now is putting together healthy meals. My husband and I both work the same schedule and from the time we pick up our son from daycare, its total chaos at our house to get him fed, bathed, pajama'd and then I nurse him and give him a bottle (he's off formula now and is on flax milk because he is still having problems with dairy) and put him down for the night. This pretty much all takes place in a 1.5-2 hour timeframe so it's a lot of craziness. I try to eat while he is eating, but it doesnt always work out. Sometimes I am not eating until after I get him down around 7. I usually get in bed by 9 and spend some time with my Kindle. My husband is responsible for him (if he gets up, which doesnt happen too much anymore) until 1am. Then I get up with him when necessary after that. I am usually up with him by 6:15 for the day, so theoretically I am getting enough sleep. We leave the house around 7:15 and I work from 8-4:30. So it never ends and that makes it stressful and easy to just reach for something that isnt necessarily healthy.

    I have a friend in another location of my company who is a Cross fit coach and an all-around wonderful guy. He has offered to help me and motivate me. Tomorrow I start tracking all my food for 3-4 days and then we will go from there. I feel so blessed that he is willing to help me.

    I am looking into doing the 10-day green smoothie cleanse and downloaded it to my Kindle, so I'm going to see what that's all about. From what I have heard you can do it two ways: either a smoothie to replace every meal (plus you have healthy snacks) or a smoothie to replace two meals, plus healthy snacks, plus one healthy non-smoothie meal.

    I am also currently reading a good book called The Problem is You (cant remember the author) that addresses the ways we self-sabotage and use various excuses for not doing positive things for ourselves.

    Thanks for reading-I am looking forward to getting to know everyone!
  • cekennon
    cekennon Posts: 44 Member
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    Hello. My name is Cara. I have struggled with my weight all my life. I am 5'9 and weight 235 and doctors say I am morbid obese because I should weight 145-150. I carry it well, hiding my stomach where most of the weight is and I convince myself I look good. I do work out and have for a long time so I can do many things but I am not healthy. I am a breast cancer survivor 3 years and sugar is the WORST thing for the cancer yet I still eat it. Diet and weight gives me so much more of a risk to get cancer again yet here I am at the heaviest I have ever been.

    Its not about will power - I totally agree - or even discipline, I am very disciplined in all I do - except food. When I was abandon as a little girl I used food to comfort me and then I would steal treats in foster care and then be punished to eat the whole box. When I weight 135 at 5'9 - 100 pounds ago - I thought I was fat. It is heart wrenching - it is soul hurting - when I found out I had cancer and had to have chemo the first thing I thought was "well I bet Ill loose weight now" and when the doctor told me that I would probably gain due to the cancer and then menopause from chemo - I thought I would die. I am 15 pounds heavier from when I was diagnosed - I can do the exercise only because I had a trainer - but I had to let him go because I cant afford it.

    But Monday...after being on here and not serious..I thought - "Cara, your a writer - you love God - this is a forum - get out there and start getting support" - and here I am - I started a group "With a little help from Jesus" and I am making friends and I found this group and I am hopeful! - I KNOW we can do this - I KNOW I can do this. My cousin is very morbidly obese and I cant wait to tell her to come and join this - I know it can help her.

    I have diabetes now, high blood pressure, high cholesterol take meds for all of that and the doc says even 25 lbs would make a huge difference and I might come off meds. I take a cancer drug that tends to make woman gain weight - but I am not receiving that!

    Thank you for sharing you’re stories - I am so encouraged - and I needed this at this time because I also joined a group 21 day challenge and Im not to eat candy or junk and Im very stressed with a situation with my daughter and all I want to do is eat candy - but I found this group instead - thank you Jesus! and thank you everyone here
  • julieworley376
    julieworley376 Posts: 444 Member
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    This was a category and a support group I just felt was badly needed. And honestly now I have people here and I am reading your stories I definitely don't feel so very alone anymore.
  • jellylocks
    jellylocks Posts: 24 Member
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    Hi everyone :) This group is awesome! Yep my story is similar to many others, yo-yo dieter my whole life but never reaching that illusive goal weight. Hope we can inspire each other here! :) x
  • kbsurvive
    kbsurvive Posts: 2 Member
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    Hi my name is Kathleen and I just turned 62 last week. I have been morbidly overweight for about 40 years now. Have lost and gained hundreds of pounds through all my life. I am so discouraged and depressed because this time in my life I really want to enjoy. I want to start taking trips with my husband and walk all over the place. I can hardly walk for a long period of time anymore. I still do have my strength, but I do find it slipping away. I need to lose at least 118 pounds. I should lose more but if I could lose that I could live.
  • AwesomeGuy37
    AwesomeGuy37 Posts: 436 Member
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    Hi all. I am glad to be here. I have been big since my early childhood. This time I'm determined to keep the weight off. I've gone through the emotional eating and the careless eating throughout my life, but I've put all that behind me. I was diagnosed with diabetes T2 in Feb. 2013. and it was the wake-up call I needed. Nothing will stop me from getting down to a healthy weight.