Thrisis - the 30's 'mid life crisis'
manda1978
Posts: 525 Member
Anyone feeling this way... other than me?
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Turning 36 last year was not so bad (I'll be 37 come June) however from 30 to about 34 I was feeling pretty out of my element. For a woman I think the late 20's, early 30's can be rough but now that I am on the other side of mid 30's I am feeling pretty confident in myself.
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I will be turning 35 in September and I feel like I have come into my own over the last 2 years. When I first turned 30 I was freaking out. I hated my job, was bored in my marriage, and felt like I was spinning my wheels and getting nowhere. Then I got pregnant with my first son and lost my horrible job. This was a sign that it was time to take a hold of my life and make it what I wanted it to be. Now with 2 kids, a much better job, and a much healthier approach to living I am living my life the way I want to and kicking *kitten* and taking names!
I think it is very typically to struggle in your 30's.. It is really a turning point in your life that no one really thinks about or talks about. teens to 20's you become an adult, 40's to 50's you enter your "golden Years". The 30's are just kind of there but it is really a time for maturing and making decisions that will effect you later in life.0 -
I turned 36 in January and I feel so....disconnected from my life. I'm not happy with any part of it, and feel like I want to run away from everything & everyone. I'm not even enjoying exercising anymore which is huge for me. I literally walked out in the middle of my lifting yesterday and I just didn't want to be there. I've never felt like that before, the gym has always been my happy place. I have NFI what to do to get past this.0
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I turned 36 in January and I feel so....disconnected from my life. I'm not happy with any part of it, and feel like I want to run away from everything & everyone. I'm not even enjoying exercising anymore which is huge for me. I literally walked out in the middle of my lifting yesterday and I just didn't want to be there. I've never felt like that before, the gym has always been my happy place. I have NFI what to do to get past this.
How long have you been feeling like this? Has anything (other than your age) changes since you started feeling like this? If it has been awhile, you might want to talk to a doctor. There are a lot of medical things that can contribute to feeling this way and it is always good to rule out real medical reasons before you bang your head against the wall trying to figure it out. I went through a rough patch and found out that a contributing factor to my apathy was a Vitamin D deficiency.
Is your routine stagnant? Do you follow the same workout schedule or always do the same thing? Maybe it is time to shake it up and try something new.
I hope you can figure it out before it gets any worse!0 -
Its been getting progressivly worse over the last 6-9mths. The last few weeks have been pretty bad. I'm surrounded by this grey cloud. My 4 year old daughter is being a little *kitten* at the moment, i'm suspecting that I'm rubbing off on her.
I usually need a change every 5yrs or so, whether that be moving house, moving towns, something. But we bought a house 2yrs ago, my income supports us so I feel trapped. We were in te Phillipines last year when Cyclone Haiyan hit which made me realise there's so much more to life that this drudgery. Its Groundhog Life. Just existing to work, pay the bills etc.
And why is it that I come in here and talk about this, but can't talk to anyone in real life? I've tried to talk to my husband but it all goes wrong, and I end up blaming him.0 -
Well we are always here to listen. I definitely get what you mean when you say It's a Groundhogs life. I get up everyday, get the boys up, send them to daycare, go to work, pick them up, come home, eat, spend 30 minutes- 1.5 hour "quality" time with my kids, put them to bed and get ready for the next day. Some days I manage to throw it a work out and get a run or walk it but it is the SSDD.
My hubby is useless when it comes to conversation. I get a better response from a brick wall then from him.
It may sound cheesy but maybe keep a journal... write down things you want to do and things that bother you. It might help figure out where your feelings are coming from. I used to keep a journal and found it enlightening to read it and see what was going on.0 -
Losing interest in things that previously made you happy is a pretty classic sign of depression. Do you have good enough insurance to cover a few therapy sessions? Maybe talking it out would help. Or you could at least get some tools to use to explain to your husband what you're going through.0
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I can't wait to be on the other side of 35! I know what you mean when you talk about late 30's vs. earlier. 31 and 32 were not the best years, 33 has been better, but I'm ready for 35 and I'm not even 34 yet. Just lookin to the future.0
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I totes feel this way!!! I'm too young to be old and too old to be young!! However, I have 5.5 years of my 30's left and I will soon be in the best shape of my adult life, so bring it!!!!!!
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35 (dec 26th) started out bad, got better and I am back in the bad. So yes I get it. Just feeling like parts of my life are thriving and others are stagnant and I just don't know how to fix it. UGH....0
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I've been having some crazy changes lately (going to be 37 in two weeks) and I asked my doctor about it... Different thoughts, body changes, etc. Everything is wonky right now and my doctor said that every seven years (approximately 35 years of age) you go through major hormonal changes that affect everything - how you feel, how you think, what you like, body temperature, etc. There is nothing it doesn't affect. This may give some explanation to how some people are feeling... Hope this helps! 0
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Thanks everyone. I'm a bit better than what I was a few weeks ago which is good. I'm comforted to know its not just me.
I hurt my quad at the gym 2 weeks ago, my remeidal masseuse told me in a nice way 'you're not as young as you used to be' h,,,,, thanks buddy!0 -
I just found this - explains a lot even down to the digestive issues I have http://rushingwomanssyndrome.com/0
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Yep. Didn't finish college, having a family of my own is likely out of the picture, and I'm starting to hate the job I've been at for 15 years.
Feel like I've wasted some of the best years of my life trying to be responsible and hold onto a job, health insurance, a husband, a house, etc... without going into massive debt. Now that the rest of my life is in order, what I WANT to do is likely impossible, so I feel like my future is uncertain once again.0 -
Manda, I'm so sorry you're feeling this way but thankful that you posted this. I've been feeling so down in the dumps the last few months with a gray cloud over me, too. I'm doubtful of my career choice and actually doubtful of most other choices, and I feel like I'm just going through the motions and spinning the wheel without actually going anywhere. I, too, always needed change after a couple of years but now I am in a position that doesn't really allow for that anymore. Sigh... I'm struggling to see the point of doing anything besides working to pay off bills.
I used to see a therapist which helped a few years back and I think I need to go back. I really hope we can all end up loving our 30's and I'm glad I'm not the only one feeling this way. Please feel free to add me if you'd like to chat more. Good luck!0 -
Reframe it!
Thrisis? Nahhh .... THRIVSIS! (Hmmm wait is that like mashing 3 words in to one?) 0 -
I want through something similar in my late 20's. Just a lot of things going on in my life that I really didn't like and seeing that path was just going to make things worse. This was also when I put on a lot of weight. I'm not sure what snapped me out of it, I guess taking the proper steps needed to help me achieve the life that I wanted. Sometimes it's not so simple, and sometimes it's other medical factors. The obvious first step in which you have done is beginning to address the topic.0
