Grieving while trying to eat "normal" portion sizes.

milagros00
milagros00 Posts: 80 Member
Overeating has become more and more of a problem as I grieve the loss of my son. I see that I am using it to "dull" the pain. But, now I have the "pain" of excess pounds that is making it very uncomfortable to move within my space. I love to dance, and outside of attending Zumba Class, I have not returned to my Salsa Dancing due to my fear of being looked at as having gained weight and all the negative connotations I have placed on this.

THIS is the harder part of the journey for me. How do I feel and live though the grief, while eating in a healthy manner as well?

Milagros:ohwell:
Raleigh, NC

Replies

  • milagros00
    milagros00 Posts: 80 Member
    Well I got through Mother's Day. Or did I really? I forgot to call my own mother! :embarassed:
  • milagros00
    milagros00 Posts: 80 Member
    What exactly is a "normal" portion? To me a normal portion is just enough to make you "almost" full. Some times it will be smaller or bigger. In other words. I have to stop eating as soon as I start to feel full. This may mean not eating everything on my plate, even though it had "normal" portions.

    This will be a challenge! :wink:
  • milagros00
    milagros00 Posts: 80 Member
    This is the great experiment! During the last two days I have experimented with just how much I COULD eat and not have the scale move the next day. This is a dangerous game, I know.

    The trouble is, I am so afraid that if I start to eat normal portions, I will all this space to fill up with my MISSING MY SON. Well the key is to not give up. I WILL NOT GIVE UP! I am still down 1 pound and will concentrate on freeing myself from the next pound.

    What is my Goal? My goal is to loose ONE MORE POUND! :happy:
  • kimfierro
    kimfierro Posts: 49
    You can always use the palm of your hand as a portion size. Drink a glass of water before meals. I sometimes think I'm hungry and it turns out I'm thirsty.

    Try to work out every day and use that to replace your feelings rather than food. It's hard I know.

    I'm so sorry for your loss.
  • cbulinedancer
    cbulinedancer Posts: 7 Member
    milagros00: I no the feeling you have. I lost my daughter 6.5 yrs ago. Eatting was my friend. I gain 30 #. Than I finally realized she wouldn't want me to do this to myself. I now watch what I eat and how much. Losing weight? Very slowly. But I do feel so much better and energy level is high. I think about my daughter always. We use to go to the gym together, which I did join a gym and I can feel her encouraging me. Our children wouldn't want us to be sad and eat ourselves to unhealthiness. We CAN do this. Maybe hard for us but we will get to our goal.
  • tlicttbh
    tlicttbh Posts: 89
    Cbulinedancer....I lost my son 2.5 years ago. He's the one that got the rest of our family going to the gym regularly. We still go. I am trying to keep in shape because that's what I know he would want us to do. Regarding eating...it helps me to think about a hunger scale of 0 (starving) to 10 (stuffed silly). 5 is neither hungry or full. I try to eat when I am at a 3 or 4; and stop when I am at a 6 or 7 at the most. I try to eat slowly and mindfully (i.e., not while distracted). Even before my son died, I went to food for comfort. So that is how I sometimes handle my grief--my binging. I am working on not doing that and finding better ways to handle my grief.