Help with anger eating
Jennjoywolf
Posts: 30 Member
Hi everyone,
One of my emotional eating triggers is anger. Right now I have a very unhealthy habit.
My kids are 6 and 7, and they literally make me turn into a terrible person. They come home from school, and I start out very calm and normal. Then, they start acting badly, yelling at each other, sometimes hitting, ect. Or they won't get out of their uniforms, or they won't do their homework. When they do their homework, there is whining, or they attempt to stop doing homework. I know this is all a result of my parenting problems, and I do try and enforce limits, timeouts, ect, but the truth is I'm not all that good at being consistent even for my own behavior, never mind as a parent.
Anyway.
My current problem is that when they start misbehaving, I get angry and inevitably my emotional tolerence builds up and I go from the patient person I've envisioned myself being all day to "angry crazy person." To stop myself from being "angry crazy person", I quickly run to the kitchen for something to eat or drink. I eat until I disappear from the problem for a while, and come back fresher.
So while I work on parenting skills - (obviously, I need to do this), I need a new behavior to do when I feel my anxiety/anger start to build.
This certainly isn't the only situation I do this for. Same problem applies to arguments with my husband, things that cause me anxiety, worry, ect, ect. Pretty much everything in life warrants a trip to the kitchen for salty, crunchy things dipped into stuff.
- What can I do other than run to the kitchen that won't take me out of the house and won't take more than a few minutes?
Thanks.
One of my emotional eating triggers is anger. Right now I have a very unhealthy habit.
My kids are 6 and 7, and they literally make me turn into a terrible person. They come home from school, and I start out very calm and normal. Then, they start acting badly, yelling at each other, sometimes hitting, ect. Or they won't get out of their uniforms, or they won't do their homework. When they do their homework, there is whining, or they attempt to stop doing homework. I know this is all a result of my parenting problems, and I do try and enforce limits, timeouts, ect, but the truth is I'm not all that good at being consistent even for my own behavior, never mind as a parent.
Anyway.
My current problem is that when they start misbehaving, I get angry and inevitably my emotional tolerence builds up and I go from the patient person I've envisioned myself being all day to "angry crazy person." To stop myself from being "angry crazy person", I quickly run to the kitchen for something to eat or drink. I eat until I disappear from the problem for a while, and come back fresher.
So while I work on parenting skills - (obviously, I need to do this), I need a new behavior to do when I feel my anxiety/anger start to build.
This certainly isn't the only situation I do this for. Same problem applies to arguments with my husband, things that cause me anxiety, worry, ect, ect. Pretty much everything in life warrants a trip to the kitchen for salty, crunchy things dipped into stuff.
- What can I do other than run to the kitchen that won't take me out of the house and won't take more than a few minutes?
Thanks.
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Replies
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After school is my hardest time of the day with the kids. I do a few things that help me: I expect the chaos. I know that I'm going into whiny, tired, HW time and it will be taxing on me. When I remind myself of it, it's easier for me to deal, sigh and just get through it. Second, I have a snack or coffee before they get home--something I enjoy as a treat to gear up for go time. Then I consider it a "no eating" time until dinner. These little tricks work for me. And if it's just a really tough day I think of a snack I can eat but after they are in bed so I have to wait out my food reward. Many times I decide I don't want it and if I do want to eat my treat then at least it isn't impulsive, but a thoughtful indulgence. AND it's so much nicer indulging when the house is quiet than when I'm shoving chips in my mouth because the kids are on my nerves! Good luck!1
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Thank you - I tried some of this today. I prepared myself for the storm and set my expectations. I also had a small snack right before that I ate with the intention of savoring. It kept me pretty grounded.
That was good to be preventative on a situation I know tends to derail me. But what about the ones I can't predict? Is there anything anyone does to self calm/soothe after their stress levels have already been activated?0 -
Try going into your room instead of the kitchen and take moving timeout for yourself...do 10 jumping jacks or plank a few squats or lunges...take a deep breathe...count to 10 and the return a calmer version of you!!! Come up with some sayings...post the on a post it or 2 and read them...things like...they are tired from a long day at this point too! They WILL outgrow this stage...give me the strength to enjoy every stage! Whatever may work for you!!!
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What about this, Cindy above me had a great idea, but what about all of you doing jumping jacks, or would that make them too hyper and start screaming again. I'm 67, my Son is grown, so he says! lol! Good Luck!
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I have emotional disorders, I'm having one today, I'm staying with him in Las Vegas, I come here in the winter, I live in Indiana. It's pretty cold there. I'm 67, can't stand the cold any longer. I guess we're too much alike or whatever, we don't get along as well as I would like. It triggers my eating disorder and then it causes me to eat more. Last night he came back from a mini vacation from New Orleans, and I couldn't do or say anything right. Eventually I broke out into tears! I had gone to Walmart for grocery shopping bought 2 boxes of WW candy and ate both of them before I fell asleep. That's what my emotional eating is about. Maybe it will go away tomorrow. He has a dog that I take care of when he's gone. He's dug a hole under the gate, trying to get out. It makes me nervous to be responsible for something that Wendell loves so much and he might get out when I let him out to go to the bathroom. Then today Wendell to California, he'll be back sometime between Sunday afternoon and Monday morning. He's off for Martin Luther King Day on Monday! When we get into these rowe's then I have a migraine the next day, usually. That's my story! I hope everyone has a blessed day! lyl! (means love you linda)0
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I have been on this road for over 5 years, failing and starting again over and over. I realised today, I’m using anger with family over disagreements to punish myself by binging on my so called bad foods. Every time I shoot myself in the foot I start again. Maybe I can try going somewhere quiet, having a glass of iced water, deep breathing. Can only try.0
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I have been on this road for over 5 years, failing and starting again over and over. I realised today, I’m using anger with family over disagreements to punish myself by binging on my so called bad foods. Every time I shoot myself in the foot I start again. Maybe I can try going somewhere quiet, having a glass of iced water, deep breathing. Can only try.
Replacing the habit could help. You found the trigger so that's a plus now just identify when your triggered and choose a different action. Eventually you do this often enough and you create new responses to the trigger. I used to reach for food when stressed or angry now I will go for a walk, drink water or herbal tea, do some stretching, take some me time, call a friend...
you got this, just keep trying... 👍
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