newbie food addict
SaraShyding
Posts: 51 Member
Hello, my name is Sara and I'm a food addict. I'm working hard to battle this addiction just as I have every other addiction I've ever had but this one is as toughy! I'm seeing therapists and dieticians to help me battle it this time around because after trying and failing numerous times I decided it was time to bring in reinforcements!
So I was talking to my therapist yesterday about fighting this mental component of eating my emotions and trying to break that habit. I was discussing how the other day I wanted pizza but that I thought it was because I was a little emotionally bummed out so I didn't succumb to the cravings because I'm trying to avoid reinforcing that behavior. I explained that I'm not against the foods that cause me cravings but it's the reason that I crave them that I don't like. She suggested scheduling a day where I allow myself a slice of pizza or a cheeseburger every week and then when I eat it it's not because I'm sad but because I scheduled it that way. So similar to a cheat day concept. It sounds good in theory but what I fear is it's going to be more like a scenario where like for example saying you can not have a cigarette all week but on Saturday you can have just one. I think it could breath life back into the cravings. Any ideas or thoughts on this?
So I was talking to my therapist yesterday about fighting this mental component of eating my emotions and trying to break that habit. I was discussing how the other day I wanted pizza but that I thought it was because I was a little emotionally bummed out so I didn't succumb to the cravings because I'm trying to avoid reinforcing that behavior. I explained that I'm not against the foods that cause me cravings but it's the reason that I crave them that I don't like. She suggested scheduling a day where I allow myself a slice of pizza or a cheeseburger every week and then when I eat it it's not because I'm sad but because I scheduled it that way. So similar to a cheat day concept. It sounds good in theory but what I fear is it's going to be more like a scenario where like for example saying you can not have a cigarette all week but on Saturday you can have just one. I think it could breath life back into the cravings. Any ideas or thoughts on this?
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It sounds like you are on a great track, Sara. It's awesome that you are reaching out and it sounds like you are working with a great team.
I have a long history of binge eating disorder and compulsive eating disorder (aka food addiction). It can be overcome. I have now gone many years (7 or 8) without a single binge, when I used to binge nearly every day for years. The compulsive eating is a bit harder to tackle for me because it requires changing my entire relationship with food and my entire reaction to all emotional states. Major overhaul. But I'm doing great now, and you will too.
The idea of eating "trigger" foods in a controlled, relaxed environment is a tried-and-true part of cognitive behavioral therapy. It is something I have done and had success with. It is important to understand that it is not the fault of the pizza. Pizzas are neutral - it's your emotions that make them seem uncontrollable. Take the emotions out of the equation and you can really learn that a pizza is just a pizza. It doesn't have power over you. It is not calling your name. The craving is not caused by the pizza, it is caused by your emotions and internal thoughts. I think you should try it.
It was very important to me to not have trigger foods in the house ever for a number of years of recovery. I would suggest going to another location and sticking with a reasonable portion. Make it a nice treat. Now I can relax about that, but it took me years to be able to have peanut butter or sweets in the house. If I did have them, I would inevitably have a emotional period when I was alone and I would eat them when I didn't want to. Still, when I buy sweets I only buy the portion my entire family will eat in one sitting.
Other resourced I have found helpful are Dr. Judith Beck's books, the book The Yoga of Eating, and Susan Albers' books such as "But I Deserve That Chocolate."
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Hi Sara - I'm a food addict as well, have been since a very early age. I have two comments about that suggestion.
The first is that when I was in therapy as a teenager I had a therapist recommend to my parents that it would normalize my relationship with food to have 'junk' food in the house that I could eat at certain times in whatever quantity I wanted as long as it was not hidden. My mom, who kept a pretty healthy cupboard was horrified that I chose chocolate covered oreos as my junk food. Ultimately it didn't help at all to 'normalize' my relationship with food, it just fed my sugar addiction. At this point in my life, I don't think that chocolate covered oreos have any place in a healthy diet.
The second is about pizza specifically. A few months ago I had a pizza epiphany. I had been thinking about pizza for probably a month - thinking about all the details of where I would go and what I would get and how I would hide it. I didn't act on it for that month but it was an almost daily struggle to not act on it and it took up a lot of my mental energy. One random night I was hanging out with some people down the street from my favorite pizza place and they suggested we go there. I got one slice, I sat down with them with it and was so consumed in conversation that the pizza became like eating anything else that isn't so 'triggery'. I haven't thought about sneaking pizza since.
To me, normalizing a trigger food happens when I can eat it within the context of a social setting without feeling emotionally attached to it. I have no magic solution to how to do it but I do think that spending a month denying myself the binging of it helped me unravel it as a trigger. The same thing happened with sugar - I had to completely go cold turkey and recognize the emotional connection in order to be able to have a little bit and not fall into a spiral of sugar shame.
My triggers are things that I cannot include in my diet on any regular basis but if I'm in a social situation, if I can eat the thing without feeling emotionally attached, I will.0 -
I don't believe I've ever tackled this problem with the addiction fighting frame of mind before and I have done this (beat addictions) several times before. Or so I like to think. There is still a root reason why I have switched from one substance to another to another and that is something I'm working on tackling this time around. So this way hopefully I really beat the addiction tendency I have and I can kick these negative relationships I have with food. I was 4 square against having the naughty foods in the house. If I am going to kick it I can't have access to it that easily and in the case of food running to the store is about as easy as it gets but it requires more action than just aimlessly wandering to the kitchen so stuff shouldn't be in the house. I believe that with my health care team's help I can do this and I'm tackling it in a familiar mind set that I haven't done before so I'm hopeful this is the key to success this time around!0
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I am an addict. I don't feel I have ever really conquered an addiction because I have replaced all the other things I don't do any more with the one thing that I have to h ave to survive (just not in the quantity I am consuming it).
How do you overcome something that is a necessity?
Oddly enough, I can just about tell you how to lose weight, what foods do what, and all the things that go with a healthy lifestyle... BUT.....
I don't know how to control myself. I KNOW what to do, but I seriously cannot MAKE myself do the right thing for more than a couple weeks at a time.
I have thought about counseling.. I am just afraid of what I might find.0 -
I too am a food addict, I've been completely sugar free for 3 years, I even cannot have sugar free candy etc because it is a trigger and I will start consuming large amounts of it because it is sweet despite being "sugar free ", I had to go cold turkey and could never just schedule a day to have some candy, I'm an addict which means I can't control it. I think it'll back fire.0
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alliemay1024 wrote: »I am an addict. I don't feel I have ever really conquered an addiction because I have replaced all the other things I don't do any more with the one thing that I have to h ave to survive (just not in the quantity I am consuming it).
How do you overcome something that is a necessity?
Oddly enough, I can just about tell you how to lose weight, what foods do what, and all the things that go with a healthy lifestyle... BUT.....
I don't know how to control myself. I KNOW what to do, but I seriously cannot MAKE myself do the right thing for more than a couple weeks at a time.
I have thought about counseling.. I am just afraid of what I might find.
Don't we all know how to diet? I mean, there is so much information out there it is ridiculous. You're totally right that knowing how to "control" yourself is so much harder. Have you tried Dr. Judith Beck's techniques? She has a few books. The basic one is Dr. Beck's Diet For Life. It teaches you how to change your thoughts and behaviors through cognitive behavioral therapy. It's a slow process, but it totally works. You can do it alone or work with a counselor. Sometimes I find her annoying because she talks like she can empathize when she has never been significantly overweight or had food addiction, but the message and techniques are still really great!
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Therapy can be very scary for sure but I have been seeing my therapist the whole last 9 months while I've been working with my addiction issues and behold I have managed to lose 80 pounds so far. I think her help has been critical to my success because this kind of addiction isn't like drugs or smoking or booze. You can't just eliminate the substance all together because unfortunately we all have to eat. I have gone and binged several times over the course of the last 9 months. The key is not throwing in the towel because you feel bad for doing it. Sometimes I get cravings so bad I can't stand it so I give in. I always feel like crap afterwards. I get the good feelings in my head but my body utterly hates me for eating all the food I ate. So I've been trying to concentrate on the bad feelings for some sort of negative reinforcement and by gosh I think it's working because I don't find myself desiring the binges as often. You can binge but don't feel bad about it and get back on the horse the next day. You won't undo all of your good work by faltering one day...it's when you give up altogether that you start undoing all the work you've done. It takes time to gain weight just as it does to lose weight.0
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