I almost can't believe this is happening
auntstephie321
Posts: 3,586 Member
I swear I posted about this before but couldn't find the old thread.
My bf of 6 and a half years has active crohns disease. Since we bought our house in 2012 he had been having regular flares preventing him from working a normal job. We have gone to the er at least four times each year. The most recent visit was in February that was after having a fever since before Christmas, that visit lasted 27 days. Due to the flares he developed sepsis, endocarditis, and lung lesions. This past three years of stress is the main reason I gained back all the weight I had previously lost.
A huge factor affecting his disease is his diet. He's never been as sick as he was last time but most of the year he doesn't feel well. I've read every book we have and wrote it a plan for him a couple years ago, but he just can't do it. He won't eat the foods that are recommended and he won't cut out the garbage. The SCD diet has been recommended, my sister follows it for her ibs and sibo and does great.
No matter how much I remind him he shouldn't eat something it never changes. I feel like a jerk always saying something, he agrees with me but doesn't change.
Someone on here recommended just taking care of me, cook what I am going to eat and he can add in his carby sugary junk on his own. So I've been doing that. I make meat and veg if he wants rice or whatever that's on him.
Something happened this week that shocked me.
I made burgers for dinner with bacon and cheese. We had buns from previously in the kitchen. When he came in to eat he put a burger on a plate with some ketchup, that was it. I said there are buns in there. And he said "oh I don't need a bun"
I was stunned, he's never done that.
Then today there was a commercial for some weight loss machine on and the woman said all she did was start using the machine and didn't change get diet at all. He commented "well that's too bad because your diet is what got you there in the first place"
I know it sounds like such a small thing, but I feel it's a sign he is starting to realize how his diet is affecting him and that he can do something about it.
ETA: he just commented how he doesn't drink mountain dew anymore because it's too sweet!
My bf of 6 and a half years has active crohns disease. Since we bought our house in 2012 he had been having regular flares preventing him from working a normal job. We have gone to the er at least four times each year. The most recent visit was in February that was after having a fever since before Christmas, that visit lasted 27 days. Due to the flares he developed sepsis, endocarditis, and lung lesions. This past three years of stress is the main reason I gained back all the weight I had previously lost.
A huge factor affecting his disease is his diet. He's never been as sick as he was last time but most of the year he doesn't feel well. I've read every book we have and wrote it a plan for him a couple years ago, but he just can't do it. He won't eat the foods that are recommended and he won't cut out the garbage. The SCD diet has been recommended, my sister follows it for her ibs and sibo and does great.
No matter how much I remind him he shouldn't eat something it never changes. I feel like a jerk always saying something, he agrees with me but doesn't change.
Someone on here recommended just taking care of me, cook what I am going to eat and he can add in his carby sugary junk on his own. So I've been doing that. I make meat and veg if he wants rice or whatever that's on him.
Something happened this week that shocked me.
I made burgers for dinner with bacon and cheese. We had buns from previously in the kitchen. When he came in to eat he put a burger on a plate with some ketchup, that was it. I said there are buns in there. And he said "oh I don't need a bun"
I was stunned, he's never done that.
Then today there was a commercial for some weight loss machine on and the woman said all she did was start using the machine and didn't change get diet at all. He commented "well that's too bad because your diet is what got you there in the first place"
I know it sounds like such a small thing, but I feel it's a sign he is starting to realize how his diet is affecting him and that he can do something about it.
ETA: he just commented how he doesn't drink mountain dew anymore because it's too sweet!
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Replies
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That's great ! It's really a big thing when someone takes that first step. Hope it all goes well, and leads to additional positive change.0
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That's awesome. Hopefully it helps with his symptoms. Sometimes, people don't realize how far from "normal" they are until they start feeling normal again.0
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That's awesome. Hopefully it helps with his symptoms. Sometimes, people don't realize how far from "normal" they are until they start feeling normal again.
Yeah even looking back to last year I didn't even realize how sick he was, I don't think he did either. He went through three months of iv antibiotics, but he finally feels good and can do things like normal. Now he notices when something makes him feel sick, before he felt sick all the time.0 -
We are a good influence even when we think we are not making an impact. Thanks for sharing.0
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That sounds fantastic!!! It's great that he feels good. He will be so much happier and you will be much less stressed.
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Your example is no doubt a significant factor! Great news.0
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That is truly fantastic. Gave me happy goosebumps to read of his change of mind. Hope all goes well on his healing journey. And yours too - I know what your emotional relief must be like.0
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Excellent! I'm hoping he sticks with it. So many people experience an increase in their quality of life from this WOE as it heals some of their health problems.0
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Thank you all for all the advice I've received in this group. It's been invaluable. I'm going to continue this woe for me to feel my best, it's only been about 3 months so I'm thinking in more time he will learn even more and start making better and better choices. It's a gradual process but we will get there. We aren't going back to where we were, I don't think I could do that again, I literally thought I would never be able to sleep again for fear that something would happen during the night.
Thank you all so much, this group and the support and advice truly helps us all change our lives for the better!0 -
That's awesome! I went through something similar with my husband (he had NAFLD) so I completely understand the inexplicable *joy* when they make even the smallest change. Hooray!!!!0
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I have found in my own household that if we fall off the wagon now with this woe, we never fall as far as we did years ago, or even months ago, or even weeks ago. Everything is a learning experience. And I think that if we don't experience the negative repercussions of diverting from our eating plan, then we won't make the connections we need to make in terms of having new behaviours stick.
We also need to be gentle with ourselves and our family members. They may know that what they are eating is bad for them, but may have many different reasons for clinging onto the old routines. And many of us have experienced difficulty especially initially when adopting this woe. It's important to get right back up without beating ourselves up over a fall, and just continuing with the plan.
I have 2 daughters eating in a similar manner, and one is very diligent with her plan and is a normal weight, while the other daughter struggles, especially when stressed. She is much heavier than us and has a lot of weight to lose, but I know that if I push her too hard, she will react by eating further away from her goals. Now at least we never have wheat or processed food or sugar in the house, so the damage is not as bad as it used to be, but I know that when my youngest daughter has emotional difficulty, the gluten free oats and rice pasta and sweeter foods are consumed. So in many ways she is eating much better than a SAD diet, so for now that is great. But she also has us as role models, so I am hopeful that more change may occur down the road.
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What a neat story!! YAY! My husband and I have both lost a lot of weight eating LC. My middle child is vegan. my youngest is about 80 pounds overweight and eats a lot of junk (she is 18). Even though I do not buy carby food, she buys it herself and brings it home. Anyway- she recently said she wanted to cut back on fast food and is considering LC living (which is HUGE because in the past she has always said we were crazy).
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Great to hear!0
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It's so nice to hear that he's making the change on his own! You really can't make a person "hear" what you're saying until they're ready.0
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Awesome. Change will only come when the person is ready to do it. My SO has known he needed to make a change for a long time. Other doctors have warned him. Something clicked this time, this doctor, or just the timing or something. This doctor told him "you want me to keep you alive? Here are the 3 main things": smoking, high cholesterol, and weight, and recommended Atkins for the weight loss. 30 days later, he is 30 pounds down, and hopefully his cholesterol numbers are coming down too. It will be interesting to see what his numbers look like when he goes back in a month or so.0
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This is kind of funny. Last night on the couch, sharing the last of my snickerdoodle crepes I had made for breakfast earlier in the week with my fiance as a sweet treat after his dinner, and a light dinner for me, he looked at me and said, "So are you happy now?" He wasn't being snarky or mean, and I had no idea what the heck he was talking about.
He proceeded to tell me that even though he considers this a whack job diet, that it will make me fat and unhealthy, and all of that jazz, he's coming around. I've never attempted to limit his sodas, bread, or carby junk. He said that he thought all the soft drinks he'd had lately were causing him tummy troubles, he voluntarily put some water in the fridge, and a few other little things. He's loved the omelettes and bacony breakfasts and brunches I've made, and all types of things. He is noticing that I spend less money on just crap... It was just...shocking. I couldn't figure out what on earth he was talking about until he finally said I had him eating my diet crap. I laughed and told him I was just making recipes I liked and offtered to let him try. I made some baked scotch eggs he said rivaled any he had encountered in Scotland, so I don't know if he's on board or not, but he's far less cranky! LOL0 -
Fingers crossed those little good signs keep happening. 0
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