Starting the Journey - Do I pick Primal or Paleo?

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NordicLifter78
NordicLifter78 Posts: 123 Member
This is a completely new journey for me and I'm looking for advice on which direction I should choose. My biggest barrier right now will be family/friends who see Primal and/or Paleo as a dangerous fad and will give me a lot of grief on starting this.

The question is, how do I get started on this without making it too obvious to people, I don't particularly care what people think of me but the constant comments will get to me after a while. Any advice for a newbie surrounded by people who won't support it?

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  • JessiBelleW
    JessiBelleW Posts: 821 Member
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    This is a completely new journey for me and I'm looking for advice on which direction I should choose. My biggest barrier right now will be family/friends who see Primal and/or Paleo as a dangerous fad and will give me a lot of grief on starting this.

    The question is, how do I get started on this without making it too obvious to people, I don't particularly care what people think of me but the constant comments will get to me after a while. Any advice for a newbie surrounded by people who won't support it?

    I can't help you choose which will fit your life better. Can you eat dairy? As in not dairy intolerant? Then primal might be alright for you. Most people seem to advocate doing a whole30 /30days stricter primal to start.

    I'm still in my first month and I haven't bothered to tell anyone I think will be against it. I tossed out the idea in front of my boss (whom I live with) and he was like "don't go grain free you'll get really grumpy". I did it anyway and wasn't grumpy, but I'm sure loads of folks here have stories about a 'don't do that'
    someone told them that was incorrect.

    I've gotten around some potential nay-Sayers by saying that its something I'm trialing for Ramadan (I live in Abu Dhabi). There fore they see it as just giving it a go, and I think its not as threatening. You could try not labeling it? As in you could just say to your friends and family that you are trying extra hard to eat a variety of veggies this month, or to ensure you hit your protein goals. And then at the end of the month you can say you've felt so great eating this way you might give it a while longer and then after a while it will just be this thing that you do.

    I think another thing you can do is not to say 'I don't eat that'. Like if you do go out for dinner and you order something say stew and it's meant to come on cous cous, rather than say oh I don't eat that just ask the waiter if you can have it without, or can have rice instead. Or if you leave the bread that came with your soup, 'I didn't feel like it' is much less confronting that 'I don't eat bread'. If you don't want to make a scene grilling the waiter about what's in the food or draw attention to the fact, you can always scope out the menu online and call and talk to some in the kitchen ahead of time.

    Going out to eat will always be harder and going to someone's house when they are cooking the hardest as you have no control over the food. Hope this helps
  • keemra
    keemra Posts: 34 Member
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    Question: Do you do your own shopping and your own cooking? If you do, it shouldn't be too difficult - if not, and you are expecting your wife or family to shop and cook for your paleo lifestyle, I expect you might get a lot of grief. I cook for myself and make sure my family gets to eat what they want to eat, and all is well.
  • bluefish86
    bluefish86 Posts: 842 Member
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    It all comes down to personal preference and listening to your own body. A lot of people will cut out dairy for the first 28-30 days, and then slowly add it back (paying attention to how your body reacts). I'd also suggest consuming better quality dairy - grass fed, organic milk products don't contain the same growth hormones and have better omega 3-6 ratios than most commercial dairy products.

    You probably will get comments... but only from close friends and family. Most people wont notice. Best thing to do is not to label it; just tell people you're trying to eat more whole foods. Shared meals are sometimes problematic, but that's why the 80/20 rule exists.

    When I first started eating Primal, I used to stress myself out whenever I went out to eat or when someone else was preparing my food... but I've come to realize that if I truly eat well most of the time, the odd time I have a bit of rice or a potato is not going to kill me.
  • NordicLifter78
    NordicLifter78 Posts: 123 Member
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    Thanks for the advice everyone, I need to take all this information back and see if this is for me. But I wouldn't know if I didn't ask so for that I thank you :)
  • MDAPebbles67
    MDAPebbles67 Posts: 181 Member
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    I would advise reading The Primal Blueprint and The Paleo Solution. Or go on the websites and read the eating recommendations. Then make your own decision. I love the flexibility of Primal with dairy allowed and the 80/20 principle. But, I feel my body is healthier when I eat cleaner Paleo. Either way, I believe a Paleolithic eating plan is the healthiest way to eat for everyone whether they need to lose weight or are just seeking optimal health. Good luck.
  • Akimajuktuq
    Akimajuktuq Posts: 3,037 Member
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    Personally, I would recommend at least a month without dairy. Dairy is so often excused and yet it bothers many, many people but it's hard to determine without eliminating it and reintroducing it and observing results.

    Eating unprocessed foods is no fad. The processed junk we eat now is a dangerous experiment indeed and I think the epidemic of illness and obesity is a clear indicator that it's not working well.
  • mountainrun73
    mountainrun73 Posts: 155 Member
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    Glad you posted this question. I am restarting a paleo/primal/low carb journey and it's particularly helpful to see the suggestions about eliminating dairy. Will do that! And will miss cheese.
  • KombuchaCat
    KombuchaCat Posts: 834 Member
    edited July 2015
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    newmeadow wrote: »
    This is a completely new journey for me and I'm looking for advice on which direction I should choose. My biggest barrier right now will be family/friends who see Primal and/or Paleo as a dangerous fad and will give me a lot of grief on starting this.

    The question is, how do I get started on this without making it too obvious to people, I don't particularly care what people think of me but the constant comments will get to me after a while. Any advice for a newbie surrounded by people who won't support it?

    They will notice it and they will comment on it. Often. Most probably won't be supportive and some will be obnoxious. And on top of that, it's quite hard in the beginning and you will have cravings.

    It's hard, but for those of us with a significant amount of weight to lose and chronic inflammation, chronic low mood, chronic pain and/or autoimmune problems, it's a Godsend and a blessing.

    You look young, very fit and healthy.

    Why do you want to do it?

    CICO/EverythingInModeration wasn't working for you? I'm not saying Don't Do It, but it is hard and requires a lot of sacrificing and a lot of keeping your mouth shut and staying patient with the people around you. It requires planning ahead and bringing along your own home prepped food.

    If you want to know what you're up against, peruse any paleo thread on the main forums to see how people will react to your paleo idea.

    I am not loving this response, newmeadow. This is not just about weightloss. Weightloss is one of the many healthy things that happens when one eats ancestrally. Even if one can moderate junk it doesn't mean they should not try to do better. And we all known someone who looks thin and healthy on the outside but is a ticking time bomb inside. I wish I had started this when I was younger and in great shape so that I could have more easily maintained my health rather than having to do to painstaking clean up I'm doing now.
  • KombuchaCat
    KombuchaCat Posts: 834 Member
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    newmeadow wrote: »
    This is a completely new journey for me and I'm looking for advice on which direction I should choose. My biggest barrier right now will be family/friends who see Primal and/or Paleo as a dangerous fad and will give me a lot of grief on starting this.

    The question is, how do I get started on this without making it too obvious to people, I don't particularly care what people think of me but the constant comments will get to me after a while. Any advice for a newbie surrounded by people who won't support it?

    They will notice it and they will comment on it. Often. Most probably won't be supportive and some will be obnoxious. And on top of that, it's quite hard in the beginning and you will have cravings.

    It's hard, but for those of us with a significant amount of weight to lose and chronic inflammation, chronic low mood, chronic pain and/or autoimmune problems, it's a Godsend and a blessing.

    You look young, very fit and healthy.

    Why do you want to do it?

    CICO/EverythingInModeration wasn't working for you? I'm not saying Don't Do It, but it is hard and requires a lot of sacrificing and a lot of keeping your mouth shut and staying patient with the people around you. It requires planning ahead and bringing along your own home prepped food.

    If you want to know what you're up against, peruse any paleo thread on the main forums to see how people will react to your paleo idea.

    Sorry if my response was a little harsh. I understand what you are saying. However Paleo is only as hard as one makes it and it's right for everyone, no matter what your current health status is. Paleo is about thriving and being our most human selves aligned with nature.
  • KombuchaCat
    KombuchaCat Posts: 834 Member
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    newmeadow wrote: »
    newmeadow wrote: »
    This is a completely new journey for me and I'm looking for advice on which direction I should choose. My biggest barrier right now will be family/friends who see Primal and/or Paleo as a dangerous fad and will give me a lot of grief on starting this.

    The question is, how do I get started on this without making it too obvious to people, I don't particularly care what people think of me but the constant comments will get to me after a while. Any advice for a newbie surrounded by people who won't support it?

    They will notice it and they will comment on it. Often. Most probably won't be supportive and some will be obnoxious. And on top of that, it's quite hard in the beginning and you will have cravings.

    It's hard, but for those of us with a significant amount of weight to lose and chronic inflammation, chronic low mood, chronic pain and/or autoimmune problems, it's a Godsend and a blessing.

    You look young, very fit and healthy.

    Why do you want to do it?

    CICO/EverythingInModeration wasn't working for you? I'm not saying Don't Do It, but it is hard and requires a lot of sacrificing and a lot of keeping your mouth shut and staying patient with the people around you. It requires planning ahead and bringing along your own home prepped food.

    If you want to know what you're up against, peruse any paleo thread on the main forums to see how people will react to your paleo idea.

    Sorry if my response was a little harsh. I understand what you are saying. However Paleo is only as hard as one makes it and it's right for everyone, no matter what your current health status is. Paleo is about thriving and being our most human selves aligned with nature.

    No need to apologize. Civil disagreement is very okay and is great to open up interesting discussions. Speaking for myself, I have a history of a very maniacal relationship with food and eating. I didn't get so fat and sick from eating a few too many spoonfulls of oatmeal at breakfast and an extra handful of grapes for my evening snack, lol. I was consuming between 4,000 and 6,000 calories a day, with about 75% of those calories coming from starchy carbs, high fructose corn syrup and concentrated cane sugar.

    Paleo is saving my life, literally. But I'm not 80/20 due to my wildly addictive and compulsive history with these poisons. For me these things are poison. So I find paleo to be hard but totally worth it.

    I combine my paleo food plan with face to face meetings in a 12 Step food fellowship. We're all doing paleo in the fellowship, but we call it something else. I follow the fellowship's structure, which is rigid and uncompromising. All food weighed and measured and logged. Food called in to a sponsor. Meetings attended. Phone calls. 12 Step literature read. No skipping meals unless illness calls for it. No playing around with portions or eating outside exactly what's committed to the sponsor. All meals home cooked, home prepared. I bring all my meals everywhere I go.

    In this fellowship, we call eating paleo "abstinence." Abstinence is 24/7, with no exceptions. The most popular slogans in the program are "Don't Eat no Matter what (and) Die...but don't Eat (and) Abstinence is the Most Important Thing in my Life. (Eat, in the program, means eating anything which is not on our paleo food plan in weighed and measured amounts at agreed upon meal times.)

    I know not everyone does it this way and doesn't have to. But I do think giving up all desserts, grains, legumes and potatoes really is going to be hard for anyone who has gotten used to eating these things and likes them.

    But that's paleo for ya :smile: Abstinence from compulsive overeating is the most important thing in my life and Paleo is the Way.

    Oh my, I defiantely see where you are coming from! Paleo makes it much easier for me to make better choices as well. It's better if I just abstain most of the time so I totally get it. That's actually what really bugs me about most of the IIFYM crowd on MFP. If you can moderate there's no way you can really understand someone who can't. I didn't get fat from one treat/week either :blush:
  • Kimberly_Harper
    Kimberly_Harper Posts: 409 Member
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    newmeadow wrote: »
    newmeadow wrote: »
    newmeadow wrote: »
    This is a completely new journey for me and I'm looking for advice on which direction I should choose. My biggest barrier right now will be family/friends who see Primal and/or Paleo as a dangerous fad and will give me a lot of grief on starting this.

    The question is, how do I get started on this without making it too obvious to people, I don't particularly care what people think of me but the constant comments will get to me after a while. Any advice for a newbie surrounded by people who won't support it?

    They will notice it and they will comment on it. Often. Most probably won't be supportive and some will be obnoxious. And on top of that, it's quite hard in the beginning and you will have cravings.

    It's hard, but for those of us with a significant amount of weight to lose and chronic inflammation, chronic low mood, chronic pain and/or autoimmune problems, it's a Godsend and a blessing.

    You look young, very fit and healthy.

    Why do you want to do it?

    CICO/EverythingInModeration wasn't working for you? I'm not saying Don't Do It, but it is hard and requires a lot of sacrificing and a lot of keeping your mouth shut and staying patient with the people around you. It requires planning ahead and bringing along your own home prepped food.

    If you want to know what you're up against, peruse any paleo thread on the main forums to see how people will react to your paleo idea.

    Sorry if my response was a little harsh. I understand what you are saying. However Paleo is only as hard as one makes it and it's right for everyone, no matter what your current health status is. Paleo is about thriving and being our most human selves aligned with nature.

    No need to apologize. Civil disagreement is very okay and is great to open up interesting discussions. Speaking for myself, I have a history of a very maniacal relationship with food and eating. I didn't get so fat and sick from eating a few too many spoonfulls of oatmeal at breakfast and an extra handful of grapes for my evening snack, lol. I was consuming between 4,000 and 6,000 calories a day, with about 75% of those calories coming from starchy carbs, high fructose corn syrup and concentrated cane sugar.

    Paleo is saving my life, literally. But I'm not 80/20 due to my wildly addictive and compulsive history with these poisons. For me these things are poison. So I find paleo to be hard but totally worth it.

    I combine my paleo food plan with face to face meetings in a 12 Step food fellowship. We're all doing paleo in the fellowship, but we call it something else. I follow the fellowship's structure, which is rigid and uncompromising. All food weighed and measured and logged. Food called in to a sponsor. Meetings attended. Phone calls. 12 Step literature read. No skipping meals unless illness calls for it. No playing around with portions or eating outside exactly what's committed to the sponsor. All meals home cooked, home prepared. I bring all my meals everywhere I go.

    In this fellowship, we call eating paleo "abstinence." Abstinence is 24/7, with no exceptions. The most popular slogans in the program are "Don't Eat no Matter what (and) Die...but don't Eat (and) Abstinence is the Most Important Thing in my Life. (Eat, in the program, means eating anything which is not on our paleo food plan in weighed and measured amounts at agreed upon meal times.)

    I know not everyone does it this way and doesn't have to. But I do think giving up all desserts, grains, legumes and potatoes really is going to be hard for anyone who has gotten used to eating these things and likes them.

    But that's paleo for ya :smile: Abstinence from compulsive overeating is the most important thing in my life and Paleo is the Way.

    Oh my, I defiantely see where you are coming from! Paleo makes it much easier for me to make better choices as well. It's better if I just abstain most of the time so I totally get it. That's actually what really bugs me about most of the IIFYM crowd on MFP. If you can moderate there's no way you can really understand someone who can't. I didn't get fat from one treat/week either :blush:

    Yeah, they commonly point out that fruit sugar from fresh fruit is chemically identical to any sugar, including the sugar in frosted chocolate cake. I once asked the eat-everything-in-moderation-or-you're-a-lazy-weak-slob crowd if anyone ever got hugely obese from eating too many oranges or if a lot of people have overwhelming and compulsive cravings for fresh apples. I also asked them how many people show up at MFP complaining that they're having trouble moderating their intake of salad, broiled chicken breast and steamed broccoli. Of course, the questions were met with ridicule, but I'm sure a lot of people lurking got what I was saying. :smile:

    I saw that conversation go down yesterday before they took down the moderation thread. You are right, there was never a real answer to the "overeating grapes v oreos" question.

    To the OP's question of choosing Primal or Paleo, I also think it is personal preference and research. I started and pretty much stick to Paleo, but only because that's what I learned and that is how I feel great.
  • Akimajuktuq
    Akimajuktuq Posts: 3,037 Member
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    I can OD on grapes.... just sayin'.... lol
  • kjwalker2014
    kjwalker2014 Posts: 17 Member
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    I can't tell you which is better; I swing back and forth myself. I do notice that if I start gulping down milk like I used to the pounds creep back. But here is my advice on how to deal with stupid people:

    Just don't talk about it. My Husband tried telling his fat friends at work about what he was doing and got nothing but uninformed ridicule. It was relentless to the point that he ended up eating alone. "You know, that apple has a lot of sugar in it." "Isn't the big truck you drive something your ancestors would not have used?" These people were his friends! Then he started losing weight. A lot. Fast. And THEN people started asking questions and were a little more open to the idea that is was a good thing.

    Based on our experiences, I would recommend that you just don't say anything about it until you are ready to deal with that. When people start asking questions (they will) just be vague and tell them that you have made some changes to your diet. "I just cut back on unhealthy stuff." It is unfortunate that so many people have to hide their "crazy" diet from people who are supposedly friends and family. But if you ease them into it and let your body be the proof it will be a lot easier on everyone!
  • AmyDuprie
    AmyDuprie Posts: 48 Member
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    I can OD on grapes.... just sayin'.... lol

    me too especially the fermented kind :wink: