Advice on dealing with LCHF haters needed!
Vilzi
Posts: 29 Member
So, on Saturday evening we'd organised to go over to a friend's home for a few drinks, dinner and some games of pool.
My friend had actually noticed my eating habits when we'd been out for dinner in the last few months, and sent a message asking what was ok for me to eat, and what wasn't (which was lovely of her, and she was happy it was an easy WOE to accommodate, and it was really nice of her to check.)
But another person at the dinner, who happened to be a nutritionist, happened to overhear my friend say "you are looking fantastic! clearly this new kind of eating is working well for you - tell me about it?! how much weight have you lost?"
So I thanked my friend, and went into a brief summary of the changes I've made, when the nutritionist pipes up from the other end of the table "Are you diabetic or epileptic? Because there is no point on being any type of diet that involves ketosis unless you are. It's pointless for weightloss." (which had me thinking she was rather ignorant immediately)
I was quite taken aback - calmly explained that plain calorie controlling hadn't been working for me, but since swapping to LCHF I'd lost 8kgs in 8 weeks, and that I feel the best I have in a long time. That I'd done a lot of reading from many journal articles as well as several different nutritionists. Also mentioned that I had heard a lot of nutritionists had differing opinions on this matter, but was content with my WOE for now (keeping my tone VERY friendly - it's a dinner party!) Fortunately several other people at the table then said "8kgs in 8 weeks! That's fantastic! The results speak for themselves!" and the conversation got steered to another topic although it was clear the nutritionist wanted to go on a rant about it.
When we got home, my partner gave me a big hug and said "Well done on not telling her to just pull her head out of her *kitten*!" (which is pretty much what I was thinking the whole time she was talking
) Hehehe.
So my question to you awesome folks is: Have you guys had a similar disagreement? And how did you handle it? Are there particular resources or articles you point people towards frequently?
My friend had actually noticed my eating habits when we'd been out for dinner in the last few months, and sent a message asking what was ok for me to eat, and what wasn't (which was lovely of her, and she was happy it was an easy WOE to accommodate, and it was really nice of her to check.)
But another person at the dinner, who happened to be a nutritionist, happened to overhear my friend say "you are looking fantastic! clearly this new kind of eating is working well for you - tell me about it?! how much weight have you lost?"
So I thanked my friend, and went into a brief summary of the changes I've made, when the nutritionist pipes up from the other end of the table "Are you diabetic or epileptic? Because there is no point on being any type of diet that involves ketosis unless you are. It's pointless for weightloss." (which had me thinking she was rather ignorant immediately)
I was quite taken aback - calmly explained that plain calorie controlling hadn't been working for me, but since swapping to LCHF I'd lost 8kgs in 8 weeks, and that I feel the best I have in a long time. That I'd done a lot of reading from many journal articles as well as several different nutritionists. Also mentioned that I had heard a lot of nutritionists had differing opinions on this matter, but was content with my WOE for now (keeping my tone VERY friendly - it's a dinner party!) Fortunately several other people at the table then said "8kgs in 8 weeks! That's fantastic! The results speak for themselves!" and the conversation got steered to another topic although it was clear the nutritionist wanted to go on a rant about it.
When we got home, my partner gave me a big hug and said "Well done on not telling her to just pull her head out of her *kitten*!" (which is pretty much what I was thinking the whole time she was talking
) Hehehe.So my question to you awesome folks is: Have you guys had a similar disagreement? And how did you handle it? Are there particular resources or articles you point people towards frequently?
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When people give me "the look" I just let it go or change the subject. A LCHF diet is too far out there for most people to understand. No healthy fruits and grains???
If they asl more I'll explain, but I usually throw it the disclaimer that it doesn't work as well for everybody. It just really suits me.
Congrats on the self control. 0 -
I either tell them it's what works for me, or if it's coming from a stranger I say that my cardiologist recommends it. Sends them for a loop. Although most people who have cause to know or who have noticed are just happy that I'm healthy.0
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I don't bother to defend my eating. I really really don't care what other people think. I mean, there are so many different ways of eating, from the woman I know who only feeds sausage rolls and sandwiches to her kids (because that's all they'll eat O.o) to the level 5 vegan (doesn't cast a shadow). I think people need to mind their own business. I don't judge my vegan sister-in-law for sneaking cheese when her husband isn't looking. I don't judge family members who think you need bread or pasta or potatoes with every meal. I just don't care. In fact I don't even mention LCHF or Ketosis. If I need to I'll make some vague comment about being low carb because Type 2 diabetes runs in my family, but that's it. You do NOT have to defend yourself to others for something as individual and personal as what you choose to eat.0
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I've given up explaining. I just say "I watch what I eat". It isn't lying but I won't open myself up to scrutiny and critique. There are some people who seem really serious and want to know and I sometimes open up but not always.0
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I love talking about this stuff, and I'm completely immune to the reactions.
I was talking about ketosis to my BIL, who is a chemistry prof. He listened politely, but declared it a fad.
About a month later, he asked me for a book recommendation on ketogenic diets. 0 -
I just say my diet mostly consists of protein, vegetables & healthy fats. I try to focus on what I DO eat versus what I don't eat.0
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It's just funny how different people handle new information, or information that conflicts with what their current school of thought is. My brother is a nutritionist, and when I told him about my new WOE, he was a little skeptical at first. But also intrigued, he looked at it as an opportunity to do some research and learn about something he wasn't taught at university. And after seeing my results so far, plus having done a LOT of reading on it himself, he's now a supporter! And actually thanked me for giving him some new knowledge and expanding his horizons.
Most peoples reactions have been positive and curious about my experiences and results with LCHF. It was the first time I'd had an openly hostile/negative response to it.0 -
I actually wish someone would say something stupid like that to me. Lol
It would be quite fun to say "While I'm not T2D or epileptic, and I don't believe it's necessary to eat this way to lose weight, I DO want to eat in a way that I can sustain and will bring me the best possible health in the long run and you just can't beat a "diet" that doesn't leave you hungry, eating bland foods 6 times a day, fighting off carb cravings and that boosts mental and physical energy, reduces inflammation and pretty much eliminates any risk of developing metabolic syndromes. So, I'm pretty happy with it and I don't want to wait until I get ill to start eating better."0 -
If you think the reactions to LCHF/keto are fun, imagine the reactions I get when people find out that I refuse to eat any plants at all, including vegetables. Especially when they see me cutting off big, thick, white hunks of pure fat and eating those in preference to the lean meat, or when I drink butter or melted beef fat.
I am mule-headed to a point that few others ever can achieve. I just don't care what wrong opinions people want to share with me. I'll listen, but I don't argue. My default reaction is something along the lines you, "That's neat." I get told all about how horrible the effects will be on my body. I usually don't bother responding. This can be really fun when there are others around who know what the actual results have been (both physical and with regard to medical tests). Those people love to jump in and point out how I actually have improved my health dramatically.
But, I see no point in arguing with most of them. Do you really think you're going to change the mind of anyone who is so convinced they're right that they want to argue about diet with you? Those who might see some sense in what you say are those who aren't the type to debate it. Smile, nod, and let them worry about their own concerns.0 -
I usually just smile and and walk away in my skinny jeans 0
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I've gone through various cycles in my thinking regarding this issue. At first , I was so gung ho and wanted to rave about LCHF to anyone who would listen. I noticed changes in my health and wanted to share my excitement. But I didn't get the reception I figured I would. Most times other people just wouldn't believe me. I could see them tune out before my eyes. And other times people would be rude. When I first started to eat this way, I think I wanted someone I knew to be happy for me and maybe someone who needed to lose weight would want me to show them how I do it. Well, I ended up giving up.
But now, I don't need to say a word. I walk into a room at work, and several people ask me what I am doing to lose weight. They come to me now, so I typed up a one page LCHF tip sheet and hand out copies to staff who ask for help. They say I inspire them. I am just doing what feels natural. My results speak for themselves and I'm not even done yet. It's so cool, and I'm so happy to help point people in the right direction. I also tell them that I'll answer any questions they have. Impromptu conversations happen all throughout the building as I walk through work, so cool!0 -
I've gotten past caring what other people think about how I eat. When someone asks, well what can you eat on the diet. I respond, I can eat whatever I want, I choose to eat things that make me feel the best.
Is this person a nutritionist or registered dietician? She doesn't sound very knowledgeable on the topic. Also a nutrition degree is only two years i off schooling at best or a 200 dollar online certificate program at worst. Only the very basics in nutrition are taught. An rd would be more knowledgeable though many may not understand all the benefits of lc either.
I wish someone would say that to me in the mood I'm in right now, I could really use the opportunity for a little verbal punching bag.0 -
dulcitonia wrote: »I usually just smile and and walk away in my skinny jeans
Hahahahaha!! I think I will embrace your attitude, and just know what I am doing is right for ME.auntstephie321 wrote: »I've gotten past caring what other people think about how I eat. When someone asks, well what can you eat on the diet. I respond, I can eat whatever I want, I choose to eat things that make me feel the best.
Is this person a nutritionist or registered dietician? She doesn't sound very knowledgeable on the topic. Also a nutrition degree is only two years i off schooling at best or a 200 dollar online certificate program at worst. Only the very basics in nutrition are taught. An rd would be more knowledgeable though many may not understand all the benefits of lc either.
I wish someone would say that to me in the mood I'm in right now, I could really use the opportunity for a little verbal punching bag.
Pretty sure she was a nutritionist.0 -
Ignore them works for me if they really bug me.
Better yet is to stay calm and use it as a teaching time for the others that can hear the conversation. Those of us who were obese and at death's door but now are visibly in much better health can have very high credibility with most lay people.
When we can make our case to a dietician, etc in front of others it really can open minds. Until 15 months ago I really did not give a rip about nutrition and it showed from head to toe. I expect the masses today currently are where I was two years ago on the subject.
Yes I find it easy to go off on some but that does our cause harm.
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If you think the reactions to LCHF/keto are fun, imagine the reactions I get when people find out that I refuse to eat any plants at all, including vegetables. Especially when they see me cutting off big, thick, white hunks of pure fat and eating those in preference to the lean meat, or when I drink butter or melted beef fat.
I am mule-headed to a point that few others ever can achieve. I just don't care what wrong opinions people want to share with me. I'll listen, but I don't argue. My default reaction is something along the lines you, "That's neat." I get told all about how horrible the effects will be on my body. I usually don't bother responding. This can be really fun when there are others around who know what the actual results have been (both physical and with regard to medical tests). Those people love to jump in and point out how I actually have improved my health dramatically.
But, I see no point in arguing with most of them. Do you really think you're going to change the mind of anyone who is so convinced they're right that they want to argue about diet with you? Those who might see some sense in what you say are those who aren't the type to debate it. Smile, nod, and let them worry about their own concerns.
Why do you not eat vegetables at all? No judgement, just curious.
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I don't bring it up, unless someone asks. It is part of me, but it doesn't define me. If someone feels the need to press the matter, I just say "It works for me". Honestly, I haven't been met with that much resistance. People usually look at my plate and comment on how healthy it looks. I do eat plants, though.0
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Lucille4444 wrote: »
Anything is an achievement... as long as it's achievable.0 -
Lol. I think it depends on the situation. I see lots of mule heads in life who could benefit from some flexibility in their thinking. Everyone has the right to eat how they see fit, but everyone has the right to be pissed off by what they see others eating/doing too. My girlfriend's dad pisses me off because he's super unhealthy and every time I see him eat, it's just total crap. Ugh! It's mean and over-stepping your boundaries to say something though unless they really need an intervention and you can gently talk to them about your concerns - ultimately up to them, though.0
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If you think the reactions to LCHF/keto are fun, imagine the reactions I get when people find out that I refuse to eat any plants at all, including vegetables. Especially when they see me cutting off big, thick, white hunks of pure fat and eating those in preference to the lean meat, or when I drink butter or melted beef fat.
I am mule-headed to a point that few others ever can achieve. I just don't care what wrong opinions people want to share with me. I'll listen, but I don't argue. My default reaction is something along the lines you, "That's neat." I get told all about how horrible the effects will be on my body. I usually don't bother responding. This can be really fun when there are others around who know what the actual results have been (both physical and with regard to medical tests). Those people love to jump in and point out how I actually have improved my health dramatically.
But, I see no point in arguing with most of them. Do you really think you're going to change the mind of anyone who is so convinced they're right that they want to argue about diet with you? Those who might see some sense in what you say are those who aren't the type to debate it. Smile, nod, and let them worry about their own concerns.
Why do you not eat vegetables at all? No judgement, just curious.
Check out his "interview" thing:
http://zerocarbzen.com/2015/03/19/my-first-8-months-on-zero-carb-by-kevin-fenderson/Lucille4444 wrote: »
When it comes to diet and dealing with people's reactions, mule-headed is the way to go for him. If he allowed for any "give and take" with his diet, he'd still be sick and at least several pounds heavier. So, his end of that give and take is the "nod and smile, while letting it go in one ear and out the other" approach.0 -
Ya know, it helps being "the weird one" in the bunch. My friends, or even strangers after a few minutes of conversation with me, don't know if I am being sarcastic, joking, or being absolutely serious, and doing bizarre things is an expectation now. So me eating butter instead of bread at a fancy restaurant is just par for the course - oh, that Lillith, she's just strange like that. I can always be counted on to say, with a straight face, things like, "I eat bacon because eating babies is frowned upon in our society" or "Butter is marginally more delicious then tears of my enemies". Stops the conversation pretty quick.0
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I'll talk about it to anyone, how I eat. If they start getting all wacky, I tell them that my endocrinologist "put" me on this eating plan. Not 100% exactly the truth, but he did want me around 50 carbs or less. My PCP also harped on at my for a couple years about dropping my carbs to help manage my cholesterol.
And if people get really obstinate, I offer to share my blood work results with them. Aside from total cholesterol/LDL (which we all know the debate on), every single other health marker I have had tested has improved!!! I'd say that's hard to argue with.
My fiance still calls it my "whacked out diet," but it's just because it goes so against the grain of how he believes. He isn't willing to give up his soda or bread, but he's lost a few inches off his waistline just by eating most of the same I do otherwise... He's warming up to it more and more, but he's also not as carb sensitive as I am, so I don't push him to change, you know, being an adult and all.
I just keep sending pictures and health updates to my diabetic family members, hoping they'll get on this part bus sooner or later... Even at the uppermost end...but alas, it is what it is. I can't force anyone to change...I just have to give the best example I can. 0 -
Yes. I said as much, in saying that one should stand up for some things. But being generally muleheaded can cause a lot of conflict in relationships one wants to keep.Dragonwolf wrote: »When it comes to diet and dealing with people's reactions, mule-headed is the way to go for him.
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I don't like to quote kids movies, but in the words of the Penguins of Madagascar "Smile and wave, boys. Just smile and wave."0
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robosphere wrote: »I don't like to quote kids movies, but in the words of the Penguins of Madagascar "Smile and wave, boys. Just smile and wave."
Love it!
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I tell them that I'm not eating this way just to lose weight but because I feel great. The weight loss is just an added benefit 0
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@Vilzi - It sounds like you already know how to deal with difficult people. Well done.0
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dulcitonia wrote: »I usually just smile and and walk away in my skinny jeans
Exactly. If people genuinely want to know real details about how I've lost the weight I tell them. And if they act ridiculous about it I hold up a cookie or the dessert pan or the biscuits and say: "because I don't eat this. I look like this" and point to my body. Nobody usually has anything to say after that point. I proceed to eat a big plate of meat and veggies with butter, and they stare at me and look confused. I'm not sure what is confusing. Vegetables are generally assumed to be healthy by conventional wisdom for everyone. Is it all because of the butter? I dunno. These are the same people who have 75% of their plate in starchy carbs, drink full-sugar Dr. Pepper, and then have a big dessert. What a disconnect... Maybe it's because I look so darn happy while eating all those veggies?
Haters gonna hate.
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baconslave wrote: »dulcitonia wrote: »I usually just smile and and walk away in my skinny jeans
Exactly. If people genuinely want to know real details about how I've lost the weight I tell them. And if they act ridiculous about it I hold up a cookie or the dessert pan or the biscuits and say: "because I don't eat this. I look like this" and point to my body. Nobody usually has anything to say after that point. I proceed to eat a big plate of meat and veggies with butter, and they stare at me and look confused. I'm not sure what is confusing. Vegetables are generally assumed to be healthy by conventional wisdom for everyone. Is it all because of the butter? I dunno. These are the same people who have 75% of their plate in starchy carbs, drink full-sugar Dr. Pepper, and then have a big dessert. What a disconnect... Maybe it's because I look so darn happy while eating all those veggies?
Haters gonna hate.
They don't want to admit that what they believe is wrong, that the "fat" butter and the "fat" red meat could possibly be good for you, contrary to what they have been taught for years.0 -
I see no problem with being muleheaded when it is my health on the line. I have been known to change my mind when the evidence exists to support it. I mean, come on, you're talking to an ex-vegetarian who only eats meat. Surely I am not immune to change. But, I don't welcome unsolicited opinions on what I should or should not be eating, especially from people who are sicker or fatter than I am. You take three prescription medicines a day and want to tell me that *my* eating is unhealthy?
I have tried a variety of approaches to weight loss and healthy eating. In the end, this is what I have found works for me. If someone wants to insist otherwise, despite all evidence, then I don't have any inclination to listen.
As for the fruits and veggies, someone already posted my interview. But, the short answer would be that it was a "what if" experiment that had substantial unexpected health benefits. I no longer suffer from many chronic issues that I believed were just normal parts of my life. Returning to eating vegetables and fruits offers no benefits in exchange for the decreased health and quality of life. Even my wife, who originally hated this idea, prefers that I stick with it because of how much better I feel and act. Plus, the almost complete loss of my ability to fart is an extra bonus for her. 0
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