Article on self-image following weight loss

Someone posted this link on the Rock's Kitchen facebook page and I found it to be so incredibly true for me.

Comments?

Phantom fat can linger after weight loss

Replies

  • bcedl1982
    bcedl1982 Posts: 139 Member
    Excellent article! Rather sobering. I am at the beginning of my journey, so it's good to be aware of what may be ahead. Thanks for sharing!
  • ki4eld
    ki4eld Posts: 1,213 Member
    It's true for me, especially the "doesn't understand the new image in the mirror" issue. I go through this all the time. We have no full-length mirrors in my house. It's just never been a thing I wanted/needed, so we don't own a single one. Except that it's de rigeur for a bathroom, there wouldn't be any as I can do my makeup without a mirror. So when I see my reflection, I pause. For a split second, I'm confused as to who that is. My own skinny shadow sometimes startles me, because I think there's a slim person walking very close behind me. I just don't see a new me at all. I see differences, but I can't put them into a cohesive picture in my head that has "me" as a caption.

    I knew this might be an issue, as it's addressed pretty well by the bariatric psychologist and I'm a former psych geek, so I studied it even more. But yes, I have a hard time buying clothing. I've been practicing, which is what I did all day today. I shopped and didn't look at sizes. I picked up what looked like the right size. I was always at least 3 sizes off, sometimes as many as 6. I see a size 24-26, not a 12, and it's going to take time to get used to the new me.

    So I just tell my mind to shut up, trust that a 12 will be close to fitting, try it on and see if I'm close. Except for 1 Jones NY piece and 1 Calvin Klein piece, a 12 (14 if it's fitted to accommodate the girls) fits just fine. So I'm back to "trust the process" except I'm telling myself that now. The process is to accept that the number is the number with some variation for manufacturers and to STFU about it!
  • cabennett99
    cabennett99 Posts: 353 Member
    I would agree - the mental part of adjusting my self image, as well as key relationships, has been perhaps the most profound experience of my 13 month journey. The pre-surgery psych visits did help me anticipate this ... But it's still real. For the most part it's a positive; but still have to work on giving myself permission to feel good about all the changes, and believe they're permanent.
  • AngieViolet
    AngieViolet Posts: 230 Member
    Thank you for posting this article. It was weird the other day when I realized that my collar bone was showing a bit. I tapped it so often with my fingers that I actually bruised. I just kept checking to make sure that i didn't imagine it. When I went to buy holiday clothes after 100lb weight loss, I was way off on size. My friends have to tell me what size to wear. I have NO IDEA how I'm going to handle this after another 100lbs. I'm glad that I have all of you to ask for advice! Exciting but scary!!!!
  • cmchandler74
    cmchandler74 Posts: 507 Member
    The clothes thing really is intimidating, isn't it? It gets progressively more strange for me clothes shopping the smaller I get. Just yesterday, I was walking through Target. Something caught my eye and I stopped to look at it and then realized that I was in the plus-size section and none of those items would fit me. My brain just can't adjust to it. Maybe when I'm a few more months down the road...
  • Tawnykakers1
    Tawnykakers1 Posts: 206 Member
    Interesting article. I have already focused on some of the loose skin I have, especially on my neck. We are are our worst critics. On a positive note I was shopping yesterday and walked past a full length mirror stopped and walked back to look again. I thought wow is that really me! I still have a long way to go but it did make me feel good! Maybe I'll buy a full length mirror for the house now. lol
  • RENAEJAE
    RENAEJAE Posts: 1,135 Member
    Still working on retraining my brain to see myself at nearly half my body weight. Phantom Fat is a great term for it. Going through my day as a fit person is an amazing gift, but it's easy to forget that I'm a small person now and the fear of gaining it all back plays into my psyche every day. Great article. Thanks for sharing.
  • gldngrl7
    gldngrl7 Posts: 13 Member
    I was told to expect this during my pre-surgery psych sessions. It was suggested that I take a lot of pictures because it might be easier for my brain to accept this transition if there are progression photos to view.

    The interesting part is that I seem to be having the exact opposite experience. I've lost 115 lbs and I feel like I'm physically becoming the person I always thought I was in my head. That person who weighed 344 lbs wasn't the real me, apparently. Though I still have to lose 60 lbs to reach an acceptably healthy weight, I'm having a lot of fun buying smaller clothes (from 28 down to 16) -- but I do look at size 16 pants and think "these are too small", so I'm surprised when they fit.

    I can easily see the change when I look in the mirror, but the funny thing is that it is more difficult to see the difference in the photos I was advised to take.