Having A Tough Time
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jvezzsb01
Posts: 115 Member
Hi All,
I've been increasing my calories since starting the reset road and it's been months. I've increased slowly. I was at 136-138 when I miscarried last March/April and that was up from my pre-pregnancy weight by at least 6 pounds. Some of you might recall I had the RMR test done over the summer in July and was frustrated because my RMR was 1082, I believe. I threw it away in frustration because their chart basically had me at 800-1000 calories to lose weight and I was already eating 1400-1600 calories a day. I've been strength training, using Strong by Bret for the last 2 months. Before that, last December, I started with Strong Curves by Bret Contreras and worked through that.
I'm currently at 2000 a week average for the last week or 10 days. The previous 38 days my average intake was 1832. So, I've been increasing. However, the weight came on before the increasing and with the slow increasing it has been piling on it seems. I'm popping out of my clothes. I realize some may be muscle. However I tipped the scale at the doctor this afternoon at 151.6!!! I'm crying and upset because all of my work is going out the window, I don't have time to shop second hand(5 kids homeschooling) and my clothes don't fit well. I am afraid to go up to my Fitbit estimation of 2300 because I can't afford to buy new clothes and quite frankly I'm not sure I want to have the Michelin rolls around my middle and my thighs popping the seams of my pants. My stomach has an extra tire when I sit and I can't fit into my underwear without some extra poppage. I'm trying to stay the course but I can't afford the clothes to look cute while piling on weight. I popped my scale out of sight because I was having major issues every time I stepped on. Last time I weighed it was a month ago and I was 6 pounds lighter than I am now. I'm 39, 5'1" and I walk around 5 miles in the morning to have some quiet before the kids wake up. I end up with a lot of steps which is why my Fitbit gives me such a high reading. I strength train 3-4 days a week.
Can someone advise?
Thanks
I've been increasing my calories since starting the reset road and it's been months. I've increased slowly. I was at 136-138 when I miscarried last March/April and that was up from my pre-pregnancy weight by at least 6 pounds. Some of you might recall I had the RMR test done over the summer in July and was frustrated because my RMR was 1082, I believe. I threw it away in frustration because their chart basically had me at 800-1000 calories to lose weight and I was already eating 1400-1600 calories a day. I've been strength training, using Strong by Bret for the last 2 months. Before that, last December, I started with Strong Curves by Bret Contreras and worked through that.
I'm currently at 2000 a week average for the last week or 10 days. The previous 38 days my average intake was 1832. So, I've been increasing. However, the weight came on before the increasing and with the slow increasing it has been piling on it seems. I'm popping out of my clothes. I realize some may be muscle. However I tipped the scale at the doctor this afternoon at 151.6!!! I'm crying and upset because all of my work is going out the window, I don't have time to shop second hand(5 kids homeschooling) and my clothes don't fit well. I am afraid to go up to my Fitbit estimation of 2300 because I can't afford to buy new clothes and quite frankly I'm not sure I want to have the Michelin rolls around my middle and my thighs popping the seams of my pants. My stomach has an extra tire when I sit and I can't fit into my underwear without some extra poppage. I'm trying to stay the course but I can't afford the clothes to look cute while piling on weight. I popped my scale out of sight because I was having major issues every time I stepped on. Last time I weighed it was a month ago and I was 6 pounds lighter than I am now. I'm 39, 5'1" and I walk around 5 miles in the morning to have some quiet before the kids wake up. I end up with a lot of steps which is why my Fitbit gives me such a high reading. I strength train 3-4 days a week.
Can someone advise?
Thanks
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Replies
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As to the TDEE estimate by Fitbit - few reasons it can be wrong and that 2300 may not be right (though it doesn't sound that off anyway).
Have you ever walked a known measured distance (like a track) at your average daily pace (not fast exercise not slow grocery store shuffle) and confirmed Fitbit had the distance right?
That distance determines calories you are assigned for all moving time - and you likely have a lot of moving time daily.
Have you ever looked at your Fitbit daily 5 min graphs to confirm no massive amounts of steps when you really weren't moving around, like sitting doing something?
The calories given to that time matter too - they could be very small so it doesn't matter if bogus steps are seen.
Then again.....
Even though the stress over the weight gain could be enough by itself cause water weight gain, how is other stress in life?
And any disease your body is fighting which is stressful too?
Because if it was literally 30 days for 6 lbs, then if it was truly only fat, the following would be true.
6 x 3500 / 30 = 700 calories eaten over and above true maintenance each and every day.
Could your logging accuracy be that sloppy - while in theory it could be possible, it's unlikely if even attempting accuracy.
Like weighing all foods, not measuring volume. Because calories is per gram, not cupful or spoonful.
It logging accuracy is poor though, some could be in excess, along with stress retained water, causing weight gain.0 -
Thank you heybales, for responding.
I don't have any illness. I'm fairly lucky and don't have any chronic conditions or take medication. We have had some dry, warm weather and when the Santa Ana winds kick up my allergies bother me but that is about it.
I checked the Fitbit graphs and they look accurate. I have 15 minute chunks of no activity or very few steps and I have checked while driving to make sure it isn't logging steps and it doesn't. I have a Zip and I actually wear it to sleep on my shirt and it never picks up steps in my sleep. I haven't hopped onto the treadmill and measured the distance though, so perhaps I should do that. My husband helped me measure my stride length a few months back at the end of summer. The Fitbit has my accurate stride length. We did it outside in the driveway.
I use a scale and measure in grams; my meat before cooking, my potatoes before roasting and my yogurt and my cereal, you name it. I still measure out my half-half in the morning and everything else. I pop my milk glass on there and zero it out to get my accurate milk serving. My husband gave me a hard time for measuring my wine, but I do anyway! So if my logging is inaccurate it shouldn't be by much.
I haven't consistently hit my TDEE, I only exceeded this Saturday because we went out to dinner and I didn't eat much to account for that earlier in the day and I typically only eat half of what I get at a restaurant anyway and I have no idea of the calorie count because it wasn't a chain restaurant.
I'm at a loss as to why I'm gaining. As I said the last 38 days my average daily intake has been 1832. Just these last 10 days I have bumped it up to average out to 2000. My Fitbit gives me anywhere from 2300-2600 a day depending on my walking. I confess sometimes I do end up walking a lot in the morning because I take a different way(we have lots of inclines here which are great for varying it up). So in the morning I've walked 10-13k steps just from trekking around the neighborhood. Technically I have a lot of active minutes but the walking is so pleasant it never seems super difficult. I'm fine if my TDEE is actually 2100 that doesn't bother me. What frustrates me is that I log accurately, I haven't hit TDEE consistently and I have been gaining and popping out of my pants. Everything feels tighter. I saw my profile today in a glass door and my stomach didn't look like this earlier in the summer. My back looks the same, some more definition when I flex but nothing earth shattering. My waist is thicker. My thighs seems thicker and my calves are definitely thicker. My workout pants feel tighter. Last year I sprang for the Athleta pants and had them hemmed and they are tighter everywhere and I have spillage at the waist, which I didn't have while pregnant and going through a miscarriage.
I don't mind if my TDEE is very low I guess I just need some advice on nailing it down so I can cut properly.0 -
Have you considered getting some blood work done - especially your thyroid? I have had controlled hashimotos most of my life - except for this year. I gained 15 pounds in a little over a year while eating around 1800 cal/ day and exercising and lifting 5 days a week. Turns out my thyroid took a nose dive and I'm on my second round of increased medication. Just something to think about. I feel your pain though! I had to buy new pants and it was so depressing.0
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I started increasing my cals from 13/1400 in Aug and hav gained a total of 13lbs and almost 3-4 inches everywhere! working out 3x. i'm at 24-2500 cals trying to find my true TDEE by having a look on the scale.its my fourth week now.i dont hav any thyroid prob and no fitbit or any step counter. i think u need a metabolic reset to recharge your body. i went for a reset coz i used to gain even at 1300 working out 6x!1
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As hard as the gain on the scale may be, as awful it is not fitting well into your clothes, seems to me that your body is trying to hold onto anything and everything it can now that you're is metabolism is starting to increase again. It does take time and consistency to get the body trusting you again. Considering how active you are on a daily basis, your Fitbit seems to be right. Out of curiosity, how are your macros? How is your stress level? Checking your thyroid does not sound like a bad idea.
Two reading homeworks here: http://pin.it/wHIdbQm
http://pin.it/hKVrr31
Make sure to click through the link to go all the way to the full article.
Tereza
Team EM2WL0 -
This is totally when you need to just keep pushing when everything is telling you stop.
Weight gain is just part of this process as your body re adjusts.
This is temporary. The changes you are making are for a lifetime.
I'm hearing a lot of diet mentality and anxiety from you so maybe you need to take a step back.
Lots of us took a few times at getting to TDEE, freaked out and had to step out. That's OK! If you're not ready to keep pushing right now, that's a choice for you to make.
The stress of this alone could be adding on the inches.
I think your TDEE will be pretty near accurate with all the walking you are doing, the 6 pounds in a month is most likely due to added stress.
I don't have any easy answers for you.
You are doing everything right, if you trust the process and just get through this time, you will be so thankful a year from now.
But if you can't, that's ok too.
Ichel
EM2WL ambassador and moderator2 -
I agree with Ichel and Tereza.
This process is not a walk in the park. Its TOUGH. Remember you are trying to undo the damage the diet cycles have done to you. The reset is NOT the cause of the weight gains. The gains would have come back on your next diet cycle. The reset just "hurries" the process of gaining quicker. You have to think back to when you dieted.. You would lose weight, then "go off plan" again and gain it all back plus some. Each and every time you dieted, this cycle would occur. It sucks, believe me we know it sucks as we have all been there before.
If you cant get past the diet mentality, it is perfectly ok to walk away for a bit. Take a step back and evaluate. Concentrate on hitting a consistent number and stay there for a while. Macros are IMPORTANT. If you try to do too much at once, it can become very overwhelming and frustrating when things don't go right. Now that are have hit 2000 for calories. Just stay there for a while since the thought of raising up higher right now is too much. Consistently hit that number. Once the consistency is solid, then concentrate on your macros and get those in line and where they need to be. Those are the only things you need to think about right now.
Stress can play a huge factor in gains on the scale and inches in the clothes. The articles Tereza gave are spot on and definitely something you need to read. It took me a long time to let the stress go about my process.
Its not easy. Its probably the hardest thing you will ever do. But think of your positives. In a few years from now, you will never be on the diet rollercoaster again. You will never be fretting over Holidays and Celebrations thinking about what you can or cant eat. You will never be fearful of eating treats.
Stop for a moment and reread this sentence you posted. You just admitted you see some more definition in your back. That is a HUGE gain! Muscles dont just pop out in a few months. They take YEARS of building to pop through the skin enough that you can see them. If you are noticing you have more definition in your back, Hold on to that. Its Huge! And take a picture of it. Believe me, a year from now you will be shocked to see how much that definition comes out. No one is every going to magically look like The Rock. We will never wake up and be "earth shattering muscular". But those small tiny changes in our bodies are the compound effect at play. Celebrate that. Own It.My back looks the same, some more definition when I flex but nothing earth shattering
Kelly
EM2WL Ambassador and Moderator0 -
Thank you everyone.
I understand what you are saying. I never dieted in the past. I lost some weight twice in my life once in my early-mid 20s and then started almost 2 years ago. My parents are anti-diet, if that makes sense. My mom always had whole milk and butter and generously uses olive oil in everything, it's how I grew up, we ate everything and my mom is a phenomenal cook with a crazy metabolism. As I moved out I gained weight because well---take out and soda, to my heart's content and less activity! I lost that weight walking and following a nutritious meal plan that was about 1900 calories a day. Then I had 5 babies in 10 years and kept some weight each time and was inactive and eating too much for my size. So I buckled down and started walking and joined and followed the MFP guidelines, which for my activity level with my walking was probably too low. I think that's what did it.
I'm struggling only because I didn't think I was undereating, although definitely didn't eat enough protein in my deficit which I'm sure caused muscle loss. Then with the plateau and gain with pregnancy and miscarriage I just have been trying to go up to tdee very slowly so I would offset the gains while maintaining my activity level.
I'll visit the doctor for labs although I have no other symptoms that I would think of that point to thyroid issues.
My macros have been great. I nail my protein daily and sometimes struggle with the carbs and fat but I get them in almost perfectly. Even if means slapping some peanut butter on my plate with whole wheat toast and a glass of milk(oh the sacrifice
).
I'm still hanging out eating more, just a wee bit nervous and stressed about it. Trying not to be.
You all are fantastic!2 -
@jvezzsb01
No YOU are fantastic!
It takes a lot to even admit openly that you are struggling through this.
Your honesty and openness will help others more than you know.
We've got you.0 -
My husband helped me measure my stride length a few months back at the end of summer. The Fitbit has my accurate stride length. We did it outside in the driveway.
This isn't long enough, unless your driveway is at least 1/4 mile and flat.
If you can do a high school track, much better, just confirm if they re-painted it for metric. 1/2 mile better.
Note steps shown on Zip, start walking avg daily pace, not too fast!
When 1/2 mile reached, note steps again. Now you have steps for 1/2 mile.
2640 ft / steps = decimal feet.inches.
Record the feet in Fitbit stride length.
Take the 0.inches x 12 = decimal inches to record in Fitbit settings.
If your stride length is just 5% longer than reality, but you have a whole lot of movement during the day, it really exaggerates the problem. Me being 5% over with my otherwise sedentary life outside exercise - no big whoop.
You as busy mom - could be big deal.
The other kicker is if your past diets really did cause muscle mass loss slowly but surely - then current methods to estimate your BMR and TDEE based on average body composition can be over by 150-250 calories daily. I've seen that easily.
And all the extra eating in the world won't magically change the body comp.
But, you'd need to be about 7-10% higher BF% at your weight than average for that to matter, and since you are shorter, who knows, could be possible.
Just throwing some other possibilities out there. Anitra has good write up link at top of group on the realities of honing in on TDEE as you work up.
And I may have missed if doing a progressive lifting routine - if so you need to manually log that on Fitbit as Weightlifting if doing sets and rests and very hard for you. Zip has no clue on that calorie burn, especially on stuff not moving steps - like most lifting is.0 -
Thanks heybales- I will try that out. Although I am still a little stumped because I haven't hit TDEE technically and I'm gaining.
FYI: I went to the doctor today and got in(a new practice) for a dandruff prescription and to talk about the weight gain and she told me to eat no more than 1200 calories and to stop walking so much. She said 1200 calories was a lot of food for someone my height and that if I wanted to kickstart the weight loss she would put me on some stimulants(!) and a liquid only diet for a week to stoke my metabolism and kick up my weight loss. That worries me.
She said that 1800 calories was way too much food for someone my height. I'm 5'1" and I'm very active. I didn't even bother telling her I've worked up to 2000 this last week on average.0 -
Wowzers.FYI: I went to the doctor today and got in(a new practice) for a dandruff prescription and to talk about the weight gain and she told me to eat no more than 1200 calories and to stop walking so much. She said 1200 calories was a lot of food for someone my height and that if I wanted to kickstart the weight loss she would put me on some stimulants(!) and a liquid only diet for a week to stoke my metabolism and kick up my weight loss. That worries me.
She said that 1800 calories was way too much food for someone my height. I'm 5'1" and I'm very active. I didn't even bother telling her I've worked up to 2000 this last week on average.
The only part that has truth in it is the "kickstart the weight loss" part. She is right in saying that you would lose weight on 1200 calories....but she's not reading you the fine print - "weight" loss would be short term....including fat, muscle, tissue, tendons, ligaments, bone. No one wants that sort of weight loss.
The part she's got really REALLY wrong is the "stoke your metabolism" part on 1200 calories. More like destroy your metabolism.
Keep pushing UP! and you will find your TDEE. Then you'll be able to say to her on your next visit: "1200 calories is a lot of food for someone my height?! Ha! I eat 1200 for breakfast" 2 -
Thanks heybales- I will try that out. Although I am still a little stumped because I haven't hit TDEE technically and I'm gaining.
FYI: I went to the doctor today and got in(a new practice) for a dandruff prescription and to talk about the weight gain and she told me to eat no more than 1200 calories and to stop walking so much. She said 1200 calories was a lot of food for someone my height and that if I wanted to kickstart the weight loss she would put me on some stimulants(!) and a liquid only diet for a week to stoke my metabolism and kick up my weight loss. That worries me.
She said that 1800 calories was way too much food for someone my height. I'm 5'1" and I'm very active. I didn't even bother telling her I've worked up to 2000 this last week on average.
Ditto's to above.
If this is general Dr - they get 1 semester in nutrition, and the info being recent that they studied even then was probably very iffy.
And unless they've had a personal focus on it and doing that mainly in their practice - they should be passing you on to specialist.
Would you expect your Dr to have a depth of knowledge about your feet, or ears or nose, or cancer?
Or would they send you to specialist if beyond simple questions?
But sadly even there - dietitians may have studied old info and not kept up with current research.
And the reason why I'm mentioning possible inaccuracy in Fitbit - is because you haven't hit an estimated TDEE.
That estimate is either based on your best guess of activity level, or Fitbit having some accuracy.
But if you have an inflated stride length set for exercise pace, that may indeed be accurate for that 30 min walk on some days.
But what about the other 10-12 hrs of the day you may be constantly moving, but not at that stride length and pace?
Getting a bigger calorie burn reported than reality.
Inflated TDEE.
Merely mentioning it as possibility - I've seen others do it too.1 -
Any doctor who tells you to walk *less* to lose weight has no freaking clue.4
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Ugh, and its doctors like that, that end up sending people into disordered eating.
Good for you for knowing what is right instead of listening to the doc.
And yeah on the walking less... WTF??
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Ugh.
Here in the U.K., I learned that general practitioners have a two week unit of study on nutrition out of a five year course. And it's optional.
Seriously? So many diseases and ailments could be cured with a change in nutrition and lifestyle but docs are taught how to prescribe, not find the root cause.
Sucks. Big time.
And that's the first time I've heard you're walking too much! Kinda laughable really. But worrying that some would take the advice quite literally.
Ichel
EM2WL ambassador and moderator0 -
So, do you all think that in light of a possible Fitbit error with my stride length I should dial down calories to 1950 until I have a chance to get to a track to nail it down and measure properly?0
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Your fitbit is close to accurate, even with a possible stride error, the difference would not amount to a 400+ calorie difference.
You have to be honest with yourself. If you are not willing to commit to the reset process, and really and truly believe the numbers are correct, then you aren't going to help yourself by changing things up every time something happens. It is perfectly ok to not be ready. its perfectly ok to need to take a step back an reevaluate. This process is hard as hell and many many of us don't want to believe our TDEE is as high as the numbers say.
If you are comfortable eating at 1950 cals right now, then consistently hit that number and get your macros in line. Nothing will come of you zigzagging around, eating the cals, but macros are out of whack (especially protein) and you stressing over the scale.
Take a breather. Take a step back and work on one thing at a time. Reread the posts Tereza gave you about stress and metabolic reset. Those are critical to your success.
Kelly
EM2WL Ambassador and Moderator0 -
Oh, I'm ok eating more food I just was worried about the possible error.
I haven't had a problem hitting 2200 calories lately!
I'm getting too used to the extra calories 
and wondering how I can live on a cut, lol! I've entered cut numbers and kind of gone 
to myself.
I weighed myself in the morning and come out 2-3 pounds lower than the doctor's scale. So in total it's probably closer to 7 pounds since my initial increase in calories and I'm wondering if perhaps my bump in calories this week and last has helped push the scale up. Either way I'm plugging along. Not really interested in giving up I just didn't want to overestimate and out extra weight on for no reason. Does that make sense?0 -
I think it's totally normal! I feel the same way, but I'm starting to change slowly as I use the apps / programs recommended by other EM2WL peeps.
I've put on some weight through this process (I'm still trying to find TDEE) and have just started using trendweight to graph the process. I've been using Happy Scale for a month or so, but trendweight gives a prediction which helps see and prepare myself for what's coming up!
I was just talking about it with my partner, and we agree that using these graphing programs has helped me to emotionally step back from the angst of "dieting". I am curious every morning about what the scale will say and which direction the little line will go. It's fascinating - it's like seeing my body as separate to me. It is my scientific experiment!
I can see that after the weekend I had a HUGE night on the alcohol, the weight dropped back a bit over time, but not to the beginning weight. Then, when I had another BIG night (I tracked this time -3700 calories!), this happened again. So I haven't burnt off the extra energy my body took in, because the calories I'm in now, in my search for TDEE, is slightly higher than I need.
If I hadn't held steady and watched with curiosity, if I'd have dumped and run like I usually do in situations like this, I'd have missed out on all the learning about my body. It's kinda fun!0
