It took me while to get the courage to take these pictures. I hate looking at my body knowing how fit I used to be. When I go into the bathroom, I make sure I don’t look in the mirror. I can’t even look people in the eyes when I talk to them because I’m so ashamed of what I’ve become. Friends always want to hang out but I make excuses so they won’t see me. Could’ve been in relationships, but because of how I feel about myself I avoid them. Army career could’ve been much longer if it wasn’t for my weight gain after coming back from Haiti and Afghanistan. PTSD, Alcoholism and anxiety. Alcohol is the only thing that helped with the pain. I would wake up and go straight to the liquor store. Get drunk, pass out and wake up to drink again. I tried to deal with my problems on my own. I was stubborn and didn’t want to ask for help. I just hid in my apartment all day. Signed up at my local college for classes. That didn’t last long. I got anxiety attacks thinking about having to leave my apartment. Then sitting in a class around a bunch of people I didn’t know, wouldn’t work at all. Tried working. The longest job I’ve had since getting out of the military was 2 months long. I actually liked that job, but my PTSD messed it up and had to work 12 hour shifts five days a week.

I walked in the bathroom a week ago and looked at myself. I was not happy with what I saw and decided it was time to make the changes for me to be happy. I’m here now and am ready to take on the challenge. Feel free to contact me and become friends. We can all do this together. We can all use the motivation. Lets Do It!