I hope it's alright that I post this here. I like having an account of changes I make in my diet and those I consequently see in my body.
Some background: I'm 30 years old and have been on a diet since I was 5. I have yo-yoed most of my life, suffered with 3 eating disorders (currently in recovery for BED!), and have gotten as high as 179 (though I am sure I was larger but stopped weighing) at the height of my BED and as low as 100 at the height of AN. I'm 4'9", but I have a large frame and build muscle easily, so my prescribed healthy range is 118-131. Since I like to lift weights, I am aiming for 135 for now.
I started at 179 in November 2016 and got down to 159 by November 2017. I tried A LOT of "diets" and different exercise regimes in that time. There were also lots of weeks where I did nothing, and I was still binging at least 2-3 times per week. Frustrated, I recommitted to HIIT, weight training, and calorie counting at the beginning of this year and got down to ~148 at the beginning of last month. Unfortunately, I regained 6 pounds over the course of the rest of the month due to the stress of breaking off a two-year relationship and engagement and essentially estranging myself from my parents. I didn't binge (which is amazing for me, as binging has ALWAYS been my reaction to stress for the past 8 years), but I ate a lot of crappy foods at my meals.
Knowing I am a sugar/food addict, I decided to get back to intuitive eating without added sugar or sweeteners of any kind. I also minimized as many processed foods as possible (I continued to drink a glass of wine daily, and I also had gluten-free rice crackers, gluten-free oats, and sugar-free bottled salad dressings). I also began a gentler daily exercise program because I knew my cortisol levels were sky high. I began last Saturday at 154.2 lbs, and I am 6 pounds lighter today at 148.2. I know these were pounds ripe for losing as I had lost them before, but I feel a huge difference in my body that I didn't feel in February, which I can only attribute to this new lifestyle change. I haven't counted a single calorie or logged a single meal.
I want to continue to clean up my diet as the year progresses, and I will note any changes here. I'm so happy to find a space for those of us who do care about the content of our meals and not just the macros. I know calorie counting works very well, but I believe that this path is the healthiest for me given my tendency towards food obsession and will likely be the most sustainable for me for the rest of my life.