I have had this EXACT same issue (super stressful!!) but then one time went to a dinner after recovering from a bad flu/stomach virus and didn't eat at all...and no one noticed or said anything. I think in my head, I felt like all eyes were on me and what I eat at parties and dinners, judging me for eating less or eating oddly....but the fact is, unless you make a spectacle of yourself, normal people don't care what you consume.

So now, I often eat first before going to a party and hold a drink, or have one drink. I don't eat the party food because it's not that special and I can enjoy my little keto-friendly dinner more without the anxiety of whether there's potato starch hidden somewhere, anyway.

I tend to actually have more fun and enjoy people more when the food issue is completely off the table.

If anyone asks, I tell them I am doing keto and they sometimes ask some questions, but usually they just turn it on them, "Ugh, diets are so hard for me, I wish I had your willpower" and then I change the subject to something not weight related and all is good with the universe. :-)

The only time this was hard was on my actual birthday. My friends ordered me chocolate cake while I was in the bathroom! I took a bite and passed it around the table and they all enjoyed it, but also teased me for not even eating dessert on my birthday!

Discomfort over what I eat and don't eat is/was self imposed. People don't care. The only time I feel uncomfortable not eating something is at a sit down dinner at someone's home and they have purposely planned a meal that would be eaten and pleasing to all. But then, when I was eating strict MTKD, my friends were aware of this so no comment was made about me not eating the scalloped potatoes (as an example).

If you're worried about being tempted by the food, step away from the food table. I quickly learned that if I've not put the food in my sight and at my fingertips, I don't eat it. Eat beforehand if you must. I've rarely found that there was nothing I could eat at parties.

In regards to alcoholic beverages if that is what you mean by "drinks", other people don't care about that either except for that random person who likes to be around other "drinkers" because it somehow makes them feel OK about their excessiveness. If someone happens to ask what I'm drinking to perhaps start a conversation, my answer is usually the same. Caffeine Free Diet Pepsi. Do you live in the neighborhood? Or Caffeine Free Diet Pepsi. Do you have all your Christmas shopping done? Or Caffeine Free Diet Pepsi. Now that bowling season (or hockey season) is over, how will you be filling your time? I redirect the conversations about both my choices of drinks and food when I feel it might be appropriate to do so.

FANCY1977 wrote: »

This always seems to be my dilemma, strict keto all week long, and everything is going great – in comes the weekend and it all goes to hell. How do others manage the weekend when, say like in my case this weekend, this Friday night I have a work hockey party which will involve drinks and a junky diner, then Saturday I have a bowling party which involves drinks and junky diner, etc etc. How can I pull it off without drawing attention to myself I guess is my question? Does anyone have any tricks??

Here's something to think about. Seems a bit gloomy but there is truth in it. do you really care what other people think about what you eat? How important is it?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F_icRVSG2D4

My go-to items for happy hour are wings or burgers (no-bun)...some places will have meatballs or cheese or tuna or something like fish/chips or hand made chicken tenders...if the breading is light I can usually manage them with no ill effects, but if it's one of those places that just has the frozen-covered-in-tons-of-breading version, then I skip it, and I always skip eating the fries, but generally if I'm in a group others will snack on them so they don't go to waste...or I'll take them home to the kids...

Most of it just depends on where you are and what is available - sometimes where will even be like a chicken caesar salad - so yum.

I always try to read the menu and pick my food in advance. Then don't even look at the menu while I'm there...so I'm not tempted by the bad food, I have a plan, I follow it, WIN.

For drinks I usually go with wine or whiskey and diet soda.

Drink wise you can pull the old trick, if there's a bartender or bar "fixings", of getting a sparkling water or club soda, a straw and a wedge of lime or lemon in it. People will think it's a vodka/gin mixture of some kind and not pressure you. I've done that a few times and it works. Same for cola, get a diet cola of some kind in a mixed drink glass with a straw and garnish and you'll be covered.

Just uh, don't slam 8 or 9 of those really fast. People will notice that then think you have a legendary alcohol tolerance or be worried about you.

I find 'junky diners' tend to have more keto friendly food than the 'healthy diners', lol. I think its because they tend to focus on fatty meats, cheese, etc and not on plain salads or low fat options. Have a big cheese and mushroom burger (lettuce wrapped) - hold the ketchup if any - sub out more fried mushrooms for the fries (or a green salad if they do it - with bleu cheese dressing.) Hard liquor and soda or diet drinks do the trick if you aren't choosing to be the DD. If it's a wandering or stand around event, holding a drink always works.

I have to admit that I have total social anxiety when it comes to going out on weekends. I've been pretty much a total recluse because of it. Not that I'm afraid of any one thing, nor am I the type to go out and party it up every weekend, because I'm totally happy to sit at home, binge watching a favorite TV show drinking my Grey Goose on the rocks. I just know how people are, especially when you live in a small town. Peer pressure at 35 shouldn't exist, but it does. And it's annoying, but a total reality for me.

That being said, I have so owned my keto lifestyle that I broadcast it to everyone via Instagram and Facebook, just so I don't have to keep explaining myself over and over. And to the stragglers I get questions from, what's keto? Why are you doing it? You look healthy! Because I'm tired of being diabetic, and this diet has gotten me off of injecting insulin, is always my answer.

My work had a huge potluck just the other day, but I never once was tempted to go into the breakroom. Instead, I offered to clean up the mess afterwards because if nothing else, the mess keeps me from wanting to eat any of that junk and reinforces to myself that I don't need any of it any more. (Potlucks at my work are ALWAYS chips/cookies/dips/chips/muffins/and more chips.)

But going out to dinner/lunch with my husband has been a real joy! I look at the menus ahead of time and plan out what I'd like to eat, plug it into my food diary and can eat anywhere! I still can go to Red Lobster and order the swordfish New Orleans I love. I still can go to Red Robin and eat a fat juicy cheeseburger with jalapeno relish! There are no limits except those you place on yourself. Get creative! You can do it!

Good thread, and I loved the motivational video too.

I find at those finger food gatherings it is good to keep moving around.

That way no-one sees whether you've eaten yet or not. I often fast, and this moving trick works very well. I'm also gluten and chocolate intolerant (for digestive, and migraine reasons respectively) and it's surprising how often nibbly foods have one or both of those involved.

Keep moving.

Don't worry about bringing attention to yourself, maybe parties like this need to rethink "junky" meal options in place of something healthier. You can lead by example and just say you are trying not to eat so much junk. I do that all the time and if there is nothing for me to eat at a gathering I eat before I go or bring something along for myself. The gathering should be about getting together and being social not getting communal carb bloat or sugar crashes.

Honestly, if I can manage eating out at most places, everyone else here should have no problem. I don't really worry about drawing attention to myself. I used to worry about that, but it's just something that I am comfortable with these days. I get some looks, LOL, but then again how many people order only burger patties, a cup of ice, and hot coffee?

If there is drinking, I might have some bourbon, scotch, or whiskey. But, usually I will have nothing. I'm way past the point of caring if people think I am a stick-in-the-mud. I just say that I'm the designated driver or that I have to drive. My occupation and volunteer activities are both things that would be destroyed by a DUI. I don't get behind the wheel even after a single drink.