Miscarriage

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gingermary82
gingermary82 Posts: 12 Member
Hi guys

I wanted to start this board for those of us that have been affected by miscarriages. I feel that it's not spoken about, despite being so common and heartbreaking. It's sad that the moment you start telling people how many women share their own stories, but not before. It's like we are some secret club.

So it would be great if we had somewhere to share our stories, ask for advice and hear other peoples paths.

My story:

I'm 35 going on 36, married 2 years. We've been trying for both our firsts. Got pregnant after about 5 months of trying (and loosing 10kg before). Found out at our 12 week scan that the baby had no heartbeat and measured 9 weeks. This is after getting a strong heartbeat at 7 weeks. Confirmed 3 days later and had a D&C a day later. We elected to do genetic screening and it was found that it was a girl that had had Mosaic Monosomy X/Turner syndrome.

D&C was three weeks ago, we are thinking of trying again after my first period. Currently on a course of estrogen and progesterone that is supposed to prevent adhesions and start my period again (not 100% sure, forgot to ask detailed questions). I have mixed feelings about trying again; scared of another MC, scared it takes months/years to fall pregnant again.

What has been your experiences?

Replies

  • WifiresGettingFit
    WifiresGettingFit Posts: 1,773 Member
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    @gingermary82 I appreciate you sharing your story with us, I'm very sorry for your loss.
  • arendiva
    arendiva Posts: 177 Member
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    I'm sorry for your loss. I know it can be difficult to get back into the TTC spirit after miscarrying. My cousin and his wife miscarried about 9 months ago and they are still grieving the loss. Don't let anyone tell you how to grieve or how much time it takes. Do what feels right for you and your partner.
  • VeryKatie
    VeryKatie Posts: 5,950 Member
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    I'm sorry for your loss too! I haven't been through it myslef, but my sister and several friends have. I wish it wasn't so taboo to speak about, or downplayed by society as much. It doesn't matter if it's common or not, it is still tragic! No one would downplay the loss of a family member to someone (which is something that happens to 100% of all people), and this is exactly that.

    While I don't have much emotional wisdom to share, I have heard it can be easier to get pregnant again right after an MC, so if that's what you want, I say go for it. Honestly, I think you will probably feel anxious no matter when it happens for you :( . Your body will know when it is ready to become pregnant again (quote from my sister's doctor).

    My friend got rings that she wears on her right ring finger for each of her miscarriages, engraved with her baby's name. I think that's so sweet, so if something like that would be helpful you could try that. I've also heard of the Japanese Jizo statue, if that might be an option for you (or something similar).

    https://www.nytimes.com/2017/01/06/well/family/the-japanese-art-of-grieving-a-miscarriage.html
  • gingermary82
    gingermary82 Posts: 12 Member
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    Thanks everyone, and thanks Katie, it's a very touching article you linked.
  • Kfrase83
    Kfrase83 Posts: 42 Member
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    This was great to read today. Thank you for the link!