I think the important part is the analysis. And the decision about which list is more resonant. Because that clarifies your reasons for losing weight and allows you to move forward knowing what’s important and what you’re willing to give up to get what’s important.


I have mentioned this approach on the Motivation and Support Board, but have never seen anybody respond to the idea.

I was never very good about saving this stuff. I have one of Cindy's I wish I had saved about things she had learned along the way. I hope someone has it or is in touch with Murple

Hey folks -- I think you've got the gist, but I'd offer a nuance, which is that the two lists are "Why I want to lose weight" and "Why I don't want to lose weight". The distinction being: the inclusion of the word "want" implies that its a choice, and forcing you to acknowledge that NOT losing the weight is also a choice. This side of the paper also includes the concept "Why I don't want to do the work required to lose weight."

It is vital that you are honest, in making the lists. No one else is going to see them, just you. So be honest about it. And as specific as possible. Sure, we all want to look better... but be specific. I want to look better than my ex's new GF (for example).

Be honest in making the list of reasons not to lose weight, too. Because of course there are reasons. If there weren't, it would be easy to be thin. You may think there aren't any reasons, but there are. Maybe you don't have the energy right now for all the work it entails. Maybe right now, your energy is focused on a sick family member, or your job, or whatever. Maybe you're afraid of the attention you'll get if you lose weight. Maybe you can't picture what you'll look like, so its just fear of the unknown that's holding you back. Maybe you don't know who you'll be in the family, if you're not "the fat one". Maybe you aren't yet comfortable with putting yourself and your needs ahead of your kids. Whatever it is (and its likely several things, we are complicated beings), write it down.

Then take a long look at the two lists, and choose where you want to live.

Its ok if you choose not to pursue it now. But if its a reasoned, considered, conscious choice, it gives you permission to let go of the guilt. You are making the best choice you can, given your current circumstances, as opposed to beating yourself up for "trying" to lose weight and wondering why you just can't get it together. Because that's what happens when you don't face the "why not" list. It sneaks up from your lizard brain and sabotages the efforts of your conscious brain that thinks you want to lose weight.

The conscious choice also helps when you are ready to lose weight, too. Because you've made a decision to do this, you've aligned the lizard with the conscious brain and everyone's in agreement that this is the goal. Then, when you are faced with an extra 5 slices of pizza, even the lizard knows that giving in would be tantamount to saying your decision was wrong, and the lizard really dislikes being wrong. So even he will agree that 5 slices more is not a good idea.

So its all about the self-reflection that goes into the list, and making a DECISION.

Murple

Nice to see you, Murple!!