How not to be discouraged by the numbers
lyo4ma
Posts: 14 Member
So today I gained a few hundred grams on the scale even though I stayed under my calorie total intake yesterday. My brain knows this can be due to a lot of things that have nothing to do with what I’ve eaten and does not mean the numbers will keep going up. Unfortunately I still feel discouraged. So I’m looking to get any tips on how to change my thinking or things I can do to not let it get me down. At the moment I still want to weigh myself everyday I wanted to do this for a month to get data to see how my body reacts to different foods etc.
I just really want to avoid being so discouraged that I sabotage myself and undo what I’ve achieved in the past few weeks.
Thanks for any help or support you can give.
I just really want to avoid being so discouraged that I sabotage myself and undo what I’ve achieved in the past few weeks.
Thanks for any help or support you can give.
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Replies
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I track daily too. Helps me be accountable. What if you tried tracking other numbers daily besides the scale? Number of positive choices, days tracking, energy level, even days weighing in consistently. Anything that contributes to the journey and the goal. No need to go overboard but data beyond the scale may help. Good luck !!2
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I hear you. The goal for me has been to detach myself from the number on the scale. I tell myself "I am still on this journey" to remind me that this is really a lifelong journey and is not determined entirely by the day-to-day.
Undoing "black and white thinking" has been really key. Like, the situation is not only one extreme. Breaking that way of thinking is also a journey. But you can move toward that goal each day.0 -
I kept telling myself that too, that as long as I keep logging my food and staying on or below my calorie count per day it would be ok. As I want to lose quite a bit of weight to I have to keep reminding my impatient self that this is a matter of years and not weeks or months. I try to not be discouraged by this and hope that with time my habits will have changed enough that it won’t be so much about the numbers and I can eat intuitively and enjoy my food. Have you found anything especially useful in undoing the ‘black and white’ thinking?1
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I have been having a hard time with the black and white thinking, but moving slowly but surely. Been mad at myself for binging before a weigh in when I do so well. I am learning new habits and realizing that food is not for entertainment or soothing me. We can do it!1
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I’m in the same boat. Progress has been really slow for the past few months. I have to constantly remind myself this a lifelong journey, it didn’t take a short amount of time to gain the weight, and I need to be patient and forgiving with myself. It’s hard not to get discouraged though and I too hold so much self worth in the numbers on the scale. I only weigh myself every one to two weeks or I would drive myself nuts. It’s frustrating and you’re not alone. Just keep going and you’ll eventually get there. Slow and steady wins the race (and staying in that “gray area” of thinking is the key).1
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. Have you found anything especially useful in undoing the ‘black and white’ thinking?
@lyo4ma I think that understanding why you gravitate toward "black and white thinking" is a good first step to undoing it. For me, it's always fear: fear that when things are gray they are unstable, uncontrollable, unclear.
Black and white thinking offers me what I would consider an easy way out. It allows me to pretend that there is a line and that when I cross it I no longer need to be responsible. This feels, in the moment, really good. An example is, like, I eat a sweet treat in the morning. I've crossed a line from white into black so now I live in black and should eat sweets for the rest of the day or week. It's as if there is no way back to white once you cross the line (the black/white dichotomy is of course problematic but it's used commonly so you know what I mean).
Black and white thinking creates a polarity. Polarities are harmful, I think. It's like an "us" vs. "them" situation within yourself.
I try to practice walking in grayness in many aspects of my life so that I can undo the harm of black/white, all-or-nothing thinking. Like, what if I try to settle in to not being perfect but also not feeling like if I'm not perfect I am also not necessarily sucking at everything in life? Perfectionism is often part of dichotomous thinking. Just knowing that is a useful tool. Then you can try to examine where this tendency comes from for you.1 -
ladyzherra wrote: ». Have you found anything especially useful in undoing the ‘black and white’ thinking?
@lyo4ma I think that understanding why you gravitate toward "black and white thinking" is a good first step to undoing it. For me, it's always fear: fear that when things are gray they are unstable, uncontrollable, unclear.
Black and white thinking offers me what I would consider an easy way out. It allows me to pretend that there is a line and that when I cross it I no longer need to be responsible. This feels, in the moment, really good. An example is, like, I eat a sweet treat in the morning. I've crossed a line from white into black so now I live in black and should eat sweets for the rest of the day or week. It's as if there is no way back to white once you cross the line (the black/white dichotomy is of course problematic but it's used commonly so you know what I mean).
Black and white thinking creates a polarity. Polarities are harmful, I think. It's like an "us" vs. "them" situation within yourself.
I try to practice walking in grayness in many aspects of my life so that I can undo the harm of black/white, all-or-nothing thinking. Like, what if I try to settle in to not being perfect but also not feeling like if I'm not perfect I am also not necessarily sucking at everything in life? Perfectionism is often part of dichotomous thinking. Just knowing that is a useful tool. Then you can try to examine where this tendency comes from for you.
I completely understand what you mean with the perfectionism. Like if you can’t be perfect then what’s the point in trying anyway. So that’s what I keep reminding myself of this time around. It’s not about being perfect it’s about feeling good about and within myself and about being kind to myself. Eating to the point of being unhealthy and generally not feeling good is not being kind to myself, but at the same time depriving myself and telling myself no no no is also not kind. In that way the app really helps because I have control and most of all accountability of what I eat and how much. Whereas before it was more denial and guilt. So far this feels much better. I still have a part of me that’s scared it will all go back to the way it was and I won’t ‘keep it up’ but I’m trying to also be nice to that voice and tell it everything will be ok 😂
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