Hi there. I was diagnosed with rapid cycling bipolar disorder. Up and down. Up and down. Sometimes within hours, or days. Mine tends more to the depressive side. I've actually been hospitalized twice. (Not proud of that, but putting it out there.) I also have social anxiety and SAD. I'm on Lamictal as a mood stabilizer, Wellbutrin as an antidepressant, and Klonopin for anti-anxiety. I was on Adderall to help with some of the lack of concentration and motivation I've been dealing with until they took it off the market. A lot of my eating has been emotional eating when I'm stressed, which is far too often. I want to fix that. I also gained 80 lbs. in one month when a psychiatrist put me on Abilify. It took me a year to take that weight off. I now insist on weight neutral drugs. But since I took that 80 lbs. off, I think I can do even more with the support of a place like MFP and its members!

Hi everyone. I'm Terri. I've been diagnosed with depression and anxiety. I've been dealing with it for about 5 years now. I've been on and off antidepressants over that time. I'm off now, but not sure if it's a good thing. I really want to be able to feel my true feelings without medication. Problem is, what I'm usually feeling is pretty crappy. I have moments of happiness and laughter, but then the heaviness hits hard again with just a few minutes. I put on a happy face and try not to let anyone see. Why should I ruin all of their days just because I feel so miserable. I'm not a whiner. I'd rather just keep things inside and let everyone assume I'm fine. After all, most people don't really care to hear it anyway. They either get bored with it or think you are just looking for attention. I have felt suicidal from time to time. My father killed himself when I was 13, so I know the devastation that causes. Still, there are times when I feel like such a failure and so useless that I can't help but wonder if everyone I love wouldn't be better off without me.
Being depressed makes it almost impossible to have the energy to work out. I feel like it takes all the energy I have just to get out of bed and try to act normal all day, every day.
How do you do it? How do you find a way to make yourself work out? Food isn't much of a problem, I only stress eat once in a blue moon. I smoke, and I've been known to drink a bit more than I should. Nothing quite as attractive as an old, out of shape depressed drunk, lol.
So I am hoping to find others who struggle like I do and can help me get my saggy old butt moving again.

Hello. New here as well. My name is Jenn, I'm 27 and a mess. PTSD (I am a sexual abuse survivor), depression, anxiety... you get the idea. Mental ilness runs in my family and it scares the hell out me that I could be heading down that same road that my mom and my brothers are on.

Both of my brothers are schizophrenic and my mom is bi-polar with some sort of disassociative disorder. All of them are on disability benefits due to their illnesses. I have been told by my doctor that I am WAY too hard on myself and I need to understand that my accomplishments in life are direct proof that I will not end up like them. I was the only one to graduate high school (sad, I know), graduate collge, hold down a job, and just generally function and contribute to society. I get all that, I really do, but my inner critic (which is quite cruel and OVERLY critical) will always find something wrong with my success and negate it. Which then leads to me beating myself up over things,depression, etc... it's a vicious cycle.

Anyway, that's just the tip of the iceberg. I am trying so hard to balance my mental health and physical health. It seems at times that I can only have one or the other. I am either fat and happy or skinny and depressed/moody etc.

So glad I finally joined this group. Hope to get some coping strategies and whatnot from you folks!