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Having Children When Young vs. Older

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macpatti
macpatti Posts: 4,280 Member
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I had my first baby when I was 19. I was a sophomore in college and totally not prepared. I finished school and had my second one at age 24. I was super busy with them during my 20's, and we were constantly on the go. I now have 3 step children who live with us and our youngest is 9. I find myself having less energy to do things with her than I would have done in my 20's. I'm 44, and I have some friends from high school who still have toddlers because they started much later than I. I give them props for being able to do that at our age.

So, anyone have a child when you were young and another one when you were older? Do you feel the same way?

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  • amybell68
    amybell68 Posts: 275 Member
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    I was married for 10 years before I had my daughter, (I had two miscarriages) I was 32 when I had her. I look back and I am really glad that I had her later in life! I think I was/am a better mom. She is 11 now and we are having so much fun with her!! I too can't imagine having a small child I don't know that I could keep up!!
  • NashvilleShelley
    NashvilleShelley Posts: 238
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    Yes! I had my first at 30 and my last at 40. Not as much energy but when I don't have the energy for my 6 year old, I have a 16 and 13 year old with lots of energy so they play with him. I am hoping with every pound lost that I get more energy.
  • smadrigal04
    smadrigal04 Posts: 72
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    I had my first child at 17 and had al three children by the time I was 24. I didn't get to do a lot of things, but I did get to grow up with them...I am lucky that my son thinks he has a "cool mom!"
  • macpatti
    macpatti Posts: 4,280 Member
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    I had my first child at 17 and had al three children by the time I was 24. I didn't get to do a lot of things, but I did get to grow up with them...I am lucky that my son thinks he has a "cool mom!"

    That's what I say about my ex-husband........he grew up with our kids and I was the only adult most of the time! hahahaha
  • cpegasus01
    cpegasus01 Posts: 400 Member
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    I had my first one at 23, second at 25 and the twins at 35. I had more energy for the first two, but much more patience for the second two. But now that I have lost weight and get more sleep, eat better etc. I have almost as much energy now as I did when my girls were born.
  • Irish2002
    Irish2002 Posts: 17 Member
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    I had my first one at 33 and followed at 34 with the last. I just had to find the right guy. I am so glad it worked out this way becuase my first husband and I would not have been good parents. So I met the man of my dreams and well the girls came very quick. It is funny all my very close friends are at least 10 years younger than me with girls the same age. So I have to stay young to keep up with my girls and my friends. Plus now I can be a stay at home mom and only work part time. I love watching my girls grow and I am there to see it.
  • wndlady
    wndlady Posts: 70 Member
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    I had my first at 24 and my last at 37. A total difference in energy and life focus for the girls (oldest and youngest--i have boys in between). I wish I could spend more time with the youngest, but she has lots of brothers and sisters to hang out with and she gets to be a kid longer than the oldest did.
  • DietPrada
    DietPrada Posts: 1,171 Member
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    I am 42. My kids are grown and out of the house. I'm stable both personally and financially, I am fit and healthy, and my hubby and I can do pretty much whatever we want. I have a 3yo grand child, which is fun. I would not chose to do it the other way and "get everything in order" before having kids. We managed to have jobs and buy a house and pay our bills AND have kids - and much as I love them it's so nice to have MY life back while I'm still young enough to enjoy it.
  • Shana67
    Shana67 Posts: 680 Member
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    My first was at 23, 2nd at 26 and last at 31. BIG difference in my maturity, experience level and patience with my last daughter. I was pretty overweight when my first two kids were born, and lost 90 lbs before my youngest was born. Soooo.... I actually had and have far more energy as an older mom than when I was 23.

    If I had it to do again, I would have waited until about 30 to have my kids. It was just THAT much better of an experience when I was older.
  • DietPrada
    DietPrada Posts: 1,171 Member
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    Everyone's different, I have much less patience than I did in my 20s. I had 2 kids 16 months apart (2 in nappies) and it was never a hassle. I worked, I parented, I did all the things. I struggled, I made ends meet, I cooked, I bought a house, I took my kids to sports and friends places and the shops. I read them stories and played games with them and taught them how to ride a bike and a horse.

    Now, at 42 there's no way in hell. 2 hours with my grand daughter is enough. I can't tolerate her screaming or her mess. The very thought of having kids still living at home makes me shudder. I can barely tolerate people in general - going to the shops even without kids these days is almost more than I want to deal with.

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