Weight Loss Surgery

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People Piss Me OFF!

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Lobster1987
Lobster1987 Posts: 492 Member
in Social Groups
Someone posted a thread about considering Bariatric Surgery in the Introduce Yourself Forum. I pointed out reasons to look into surgery, etc...and then I someone comes by and was like Oh, Leighbie is in her 20s...why would any surgeon approve surgery for her...blah blah blah. EFFFFF That! I'm GLAD I did my surgery now when I'm young and have my whole life to enjoy ahead of me.

It frustrates the crap out of me when people who have never had surgery, have never done research on the surgery, pass judgement like that. Like they know my history and my dieting issues...etc. Like that jerk knew I was 300 pounds and pre-diabetic, had health issues. She doesn't know ****. Who the hell are they to judge?

I'm such a big advocate of my surgery and want to spread information or show how to get the information themselves when they ask for it...and then I'm just dismissed because "I'm in my 20s." EFFFF That!
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Replies

  • mwc12
    mwc12 Posts: 15
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    I wish I had had the courage to have my surgery in my 20's it took me 20 years to get the courage up and realize my weight was killing me. I let myself miss out on so much life and all because of my weight.good luck in the future and don't let others discourage you. Keep up talking about our surgery.
  • MacMadame
    MacMadame Posts: 1,893 Member
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    I bet they also get a lot of "oh, you don't need surgery. You can do it the HEALTHY way!" as if surgery is unhealthy. Not to mention, diet & exercise alone doesn't work for 99% of the people who have 50 pounds or more to lose. So they probably can't do it the "healthy" way.

    I didn't get to be obese until I was in my late 20s so I can't really say I wish I had surgery in my 20s. But what I wish is that I had never gone on that first diet when I was 13. Because that's what started my yo-yo dieting and put me on the path to being obese. But, of course, everyone was pushing me to "do something" about my "weight problem" (I was 10 lb overweight and going through puberty and growing) and when I lost the weight I got so many positive strokes.

    People's ideas of diet and exercise and being a healthy weight and how to get that are so warped. That pisses ME off.
  • Simona38
    Simona38 Posts: 66 Member
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    As much as I LOVE MFP, I will be honest and say that the main forums are not too WLS friendly. That's why this group was created. It's difficult for people to understand why we'd want surgery. A lot of people dont understand that when you're obese sometimes the "eat less, exercise more" ideal doesnt work.
  • IsMollyReallyHungry
    IsMollyReallyHungry Posts: 15,385 Member
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    As much as I LOVE MFP, I will be honest and say that the main forums are not too WLS friendly. That's why this group was created. It's difficult for people to understand why we'd want surgery. A lot of people dont understand that when you're obese sometimes the "eat less, exercise more" ideal doesnt work.

    When I 1st started MFP I saw it more and it did burn me up too. I even removed any friends who were anti WLS because I was not comfortable having them on my team and they ususally wrote something in their profile page stating they were looking for support from ones who had not had WLS or something would indicate their bias to WLS.

    And most people who have a WLS are morbibly obese, not just overweight and obese. I used to get offended but now I rarely reply to any negative comments about it because it is just igonarance and it is not up to me to go there and get myself worked up about it.
  • IsMollyReallyHungry
    IsMollyReallyHungry Posts: 15,385 Member
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    I bet they also get a lot of "oh, you don't need surgery. You can do it the HEALTHY way!" as if surgery is unhealthy. Not to mention, diet & exercise alone doesn't work for 99% of the people who have 50 pounds or more to lose. So they probably can't do it the "healthy" way.

    I didn't get to be obese until I was in my late 20s so I can't really say I wish I had surgery in my 20s. But what I wish is that I had never gone on that first diet when I was 13. Because that's what started my yo-yo dieting and put me on the path to being obese. But, of course, everyone was pushing me to "do something" about my "weight problem" (I was 10 lb overweight and going through puberty and growing) and when I lost the weight I got so many positive strokes.

    People's ideas of diet and exercise and being a healthy weight and how to get that are so warped. That pisses ME off.

    I know this is your pet peeve MacMadame!! I am so glad you joined us again. I missed you!
  • AdymondNtheRuff
    AdymondNtheRuff Posts: 108 Member
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    I wish they would have giving me my surgery in my 20's... I attempted at 26 and did not qualify. I was 34 but your skin has a better chance for snapping back the younger you are and in my opinion. I know people love to do the work and be judgmental!
  • Kelly_Wilson1990
    Kelly_Wilson1990 Posts: 3,245 Member
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    I do not care what anyone thinks. This surgery saved my life. I have a new lease on life. I am doing things I have not done since I was a kid.

    This coming weekend I am getting my Zumba Instructors license. If you would have told me that a year ago, I would have laughed at you. Who knew, I would love to Zumba.
  • Laura8603
    Laura8603 Posts: 590 Member
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    Yeah, they piss me off, too, especially the people who try to scare people out of surgery. I tell everyone about my surgery to try to stop the stigma against it. I still work my *kitten* off to stay in shape. I eat right most of the time and exercise. Weight loss surgery is not "magic" it still takes hard work.
  • erinacarpenter
    erinacarpenter Posts: 9
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    My sister in law calls me a cheater and says I have taken the easy way out! I had WLS its not a "diet" that I can quit for crying out loud! I have worked my *kitten* off since my surgery this has not been an road for me, not one minute. Everyone told me that the paid would be nothing and that I would forget it all. Truth be told I remember every minute from the time I woke up in recovery, every ounce of pain the entire week I was in the hospital and even after I got home. Anyone who tells me I took the easy way out can kiss my *kitten*.
  • MacMadame
    MacMadame Posts: 1,893 Member
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    A lot of times, the people who say WLS is the easy way out are the sort of people who go on every fad diet out there. You know the ones: they promise you can lose weight without counting calories or watching what you eat. Things like Sensa and "no surgery gastric bypass" and the HCG diet. Now THOSE are definitely the "easy way out".

    So, if your sister tells you that you took the easy way out, tell her:

    -it's not the easy way, it's the ONLY way
    -you mean like going on _____ diet (whatever crazy fad diet she's on)
    -since when is easy, bad. You drive to work instead of walk don't you? Oh, if you get a headache, be sure not to take the "easy way out" and take some Tylenol. Do it the hard way instead.

    Depending on your relationship with her you can say this is a jolly teasing way or you can be a B about it. :laugh: But either way she'll either get the point and hush or she'll get tired of feeling stupid and hush.
  • runs4zen
    runs4zen Posts: 769 Member
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    You are singing my song, sistah!

    The ignorance that passes for fact relative to WLS is totally maddening. And the complete lack of logic...OMG...statements like:

    1. Everyone gains all the weight back and then some. (This must be true, right? Because everyone who does it the "hard" way is successful and keeps the weight off forever--hence the reason yo-yo dieting is a myth...)

    2. It's the "easy" way (whatever...I paid cash for my surgery and have dieted and exercised my a** off. Nothing easy there. I'm not a lazy slob and I'm highly educated and accomplished so put that in your pipe and smoke it)

    3. I knew someone who died from WLS (peer reviewed studies and statistics dispute that there is any increased danger from WLS. If you went in to have a tooth extracted, your boobs done, your spleen removed, etc. there are dangers there too. People die from obesity at a much larger rate, every day. Cars are also dangerous at a much higher level than WLS. Should we stop driving and being passengers now?)

    4. The excess skin is worse than the obesity. (not everyone has that issue, and, frankly, it's an unattractive thing but being obese is worse for your health)

    5. All WLS is gastric bypass (no, it's not--take a look at VSG's and Lap Bands)

    In the end, my attitude is this: if you don't pay my bills and if you don't want to step up and take care of my kids until they're out of college and if you otherwise have no connection to what happens in my part of the universe...you and your opinion of WLS can blow off. I also think that people who haven't had the surgery should shut up with their biased, uniformed opinions.

    Harsh? Maybe.
  • IsMollyReallyHungry
    IsMollyReallyHungry Posts: 15,385 Member
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    You are singing my song, sistah!

    The ignorance that passes for fact relative to WLS is totally maddening. And the complete lack of logic...OMG...statements like:

    1. Everyone gains all the weight back and then some. (This must be true, right? Because everyone who does it the "hard" way is successful and keeps the weight off forever--hence the reason yo-yo dieting is a myth...)

    2. It's the "easy" way (whatever...I paid cash for my surgery and have dieted and exercised my a** off. Nothing easy there. I'm not a lazy slob and I'm highly educated and accomplished so put that in your pipe and smoke it)

    3. I knew someone who died from WLS (peer reviewed studies and statistics dispute that there is any increased danger from WLS. If you went in to have a tooth extracted, your boobs done, your spleen removed, etc. there are dangers there too. People die from obesity at a much larger rate, every day. Cars are also dangerous at a much higher level than WLS. Should we stop driving and being passengers now?)

    4. The excess skin is worse than the obesity. (not everyone has that issue, and, frankly, it's an unattractive thing but being obese is worse for your health)

    5. All WLS is gastric bypass (no, it's not--take a look at VSG's and Lap Bands)

    In the end, my attitude is this: if you don't pay my bills and if you don't want to step up and take care of my kids until they're out of college and if you otherwise have no connection to what happens in my part of the universe...you and your opinion of WLS can blow off. I also think that people who haven't had the surgery should shut up with their biased, uniformed opinions.

    Harsh? Maybe.

    LIKE!!
  • fbbtaylor
    fbbtaylor Posts: 11
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    Not harsh...realistic! Just like the life threatening issues that led us to make the choice to go with WLS. I tried "the healthy way", and I have really learned to make better choices, and change the way I used to eat. None the less I could only keep it up for short periods because at the amount of calories i needed to consume to lose weight, i was constantly hungry.....and then i would obsess even more about food.

    VSG has changed that for me. Now I eat and feel full on much less food, and don't feel I am starving, or missing out on anything.....

    They just don't get that this is still work, eat right, make healthier choices, exercise we still have to do all the things they do!
  • tncmom
    tncmom Posts: 79
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    I get this ****e from my sister all the freaking time. She thinks that I cheated because I had the surgery. What she does not realize is that the surgery was a tool for me to get turned around and start doing things the right way.

    I love love love to go to the gym now. I love to exercise. Before I had surgery and was at almost 300 pounds, I wouldn't get my fat *kitten* off the couch.

    I think that part of the issue with my sister is that I now weigh less than she does for the first time EVER. This is a combination of me losing weight and her gaining it. She is almost 5 years younger than me and her age is starting to catch up to her.

    I just don't read the crap that other people put out there about WLS not working or being cheating. I know that it was the right way for me and that is all that matters.
  • Steph_Marie29
    Steph_Marie29 Posts: 75
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    I was 28 (I just turned 29 on the 26th) when I had my surgery, I was the youngest one. My surgeon told me that I picked a good time to have it done because I was still young.
  • ngory07
    ngory07 Posts: 194 Member
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    I was 23 and now 24. Best thing I ever did! I enjoy being active now. I've been obese since I was 14. I fear if I would have waited 10 or 20 yrs id be dead. Its not easy but it has been a lot easier than fad diet after fad diet and feeling hungry all day every day. For lunch today I had 2 meatballs and 1/2 cup cotage cheese with some pears. I feel satisfied!!
  • Kylebeth
    Kylebeth Posts: 11 Member
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    Where is the "Like" button?? I had surgery when I was 23... even though mine malfunctioned, i'd do it all over again! People make fun of things they don't care to understand, they aren't worth your time. Only you have to worry about you... not everyone is going to agree with you along the way, and thats ok. People need to mind their own business.
  • trud72
    trud72 Posts: 1,912 Member
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    :drinker: i totally agree with you thats why i am telling NOone! :noway: (ok hubby and the kids lol )

    but i have already lost a load on my own so people will just presume i will be doing it that way,all i can say is i wish i had mine done yrs ago instead of chickening out of it! now on the waiting list again!(should soonish tho) :)
  • IsMollyReallyHungry
    IsMollyReallyHungry Posts: 15,385 Member
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    :drinker: i totally agree with you thats why i am telling NOone! :noway: (ok hubby and the kids lol )

    but i have already lost a load on my own so people will just presume i will be doing it that way,all i can say is i wish i had mine done yrs ago instead of chickening out of it! now on the waiting list again!(should soonish tho) :)

    Congrats!!! You look amazing. I looked at your before and after pictures! Keep up the good work lady!!
  • starrgazerlily
    starrgazerlily Posts: 23 Member
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    I am 28 and just had RNY surgery. You really find out who your friends are. Real friends admire your courage, and support you. Others make snide remarks, question everything that touch your lips, and proclaim that the 5lbs that they just lost is a bigger accomplishment then the 15 that you did.

    My mother-in-law is going to be my biggest naysayer in a under handed way. She calls me weekly for reports (and I'm only a month out) feigning to be supportive yet she says something negative to me every time she calls. Personally I don't want someone who hasn't had the surgery checking up on me every month. When you see me ask how its going or tell me I'm looking great. Don't call me every freaking week and ask how much I've lost and what I'm eating. Only to say "Your not eating any vegetables?! You need the nutrients from vegetables. That's not healthy" especially from someone that is in the medical field and knows better then to believe that some surgeon cut up my stomach rerouted my intestines and then just leaves me to figure things out on my own. Then say "well I haven't heard from you in a while". I wonder why?! You just called me last week. I'm out of work, nothing exciting is happening I don't have anything to say.

    phew...sorry had to get that off my chest. She really got to me this week. My father's sister is driving me up a wall too. I haven't talked to her more then 4 times this past year and she is constantly sending me text messages asking me how much I've lost so far. Believe me when I hit a big mile stone Ill make sure everyone knows.

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