I have been having a rough week and am really frustrated. I was doing such a good job for a while and this week has been a struggle to not over eat at every sitting. I think I might have been too strict with myself as I seem to be lashing out against the structure. I am feeling more and more like I need to find a less stringent way to deal with my need for food. I am just so afraid of getting into old binging patterns and not turning them off. I have swung in the opposite direction and need to get back to the middle ground! So frustrating. I am the only one suffering or benefiting from all of this so my binging is just self sabotage...which is so disappointing. I guess I just don't know how to maintain the weight I want AND be able to let myself have things when I want them. I so fear opening the flood gates and totally losing control.

So, last night was bad, today will be better. I am trying to not hate and punish myself. I will now go to the gym and burn off some frustration and calories...I just needed to vent first:)