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Just Curious

Bikini27
Bikini27 Posts: 1,290 Member
edited November 2024 in Social Groups
How many singles here are totally happy with being single and are just letting life take it's rounds, so to speak?

Not to say there is anything wrong with actively looking to change your relationship status, but I am just wondering if anyone out there feels like I do....

:flowerforyou:
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Replies

  • La_Amazona
    La_Amazona Posts: 4,855 Member
    I am absolutely loving my life right now, single and all! Life is good.

    I've had my moments but in general, I feel so excited towards my future. I'm getting used to being alone now and it's not too shabby!!!

    So to answer your question.. I'm enjoying being single. If I do meet someone that I think is worth going out with, I'll take the shot but I'm not looking, so to speak.
  • catherine4211
    catherine4211 Posts: 944 Member
    When I first got divorced (after being married over 14 years) I hated being single. HATED. Now I have gotten used to it and mostly like it. I miss having sex on a regular basis. I am excited about a new guy in my life. But now I have the mindset if it works great, if not oh well.
  • Bikini27
    Bikini27 Posts: 1,290 Member
    When I first got divorced (after being married over 14 years) I hated being single. HATED. Now I have gotten used to it and mostly like it. I miss having sex on a regular basis. I am excited about a new guy in my life. But now I have the mindset if it works great, if not oh well.

    You know, something as simple as kissing is something I miss.
    But most days? So happy to come home to my pups and just do what I need to in life.
    And really, this is the first time in my life that I have been 100% dependent on me. That in itself is a hard thing to give up. They don't make battery operated version of that. :wink:
  • JanieJack
    JanieJack Posts: 3,831 Member
    I've been single 3 years and I am pretty happy with being single. I was VERY happy for the first year and a half, then went through a phase of 6 months where reality hit that I probably won't find a suitable mate to settle down with (too many guys burned by previous marriage, too picky, etc). This, I have to admit, was triggered by my ex getting engaged to a young college student.

    But I got over it and realized there are worse things than being single: Like being miserably married. Like being trapped ina relationship where your spouse pays you no attention, but you can't go out and get attention. For years.

    I like men, yes, but I'll be ok if I never "settle down" again. That's not to say that I wouldn't mind discovering someone to share my life with, because men are fun! It's just not a necessity.
  • catherine4211
    catherine4211 Posts: 944 Member
    When I first got divorced (after being married over 14 years) I hated being single. HATED. Now I have gotten used to it and mostly like it. I miss having sex on a regular basis. I am excited about a new guy in my life. But now I have the mindset if it works great, if not oh well.

    You know, something as simple as kissing is something I miss.
    But most days? So happy to come home to my pups and just do what I need to in life.
    And really, this is the first time in my life that I have been 100% dependent on me. That in itself is a hard thing to give up. They don't make battery operated version of that. :wink:

    I totally understand about the kissing. I finally kissed someone that I felt compatible with on Sunday and it was SO nice. And with the 100% dependent on myself too. I went from living at home to getting married. I didn't live alone until I was 39. I am not really alone because of my kids but I am their rock. Or I try to be! And yes, of course the puppies!!! I have 3.......I got the 3rd on the day my ex got married in Maui. I love him (the pup) to pieces but really what in the hell was I thinking??? 3 dogs??? I am overwhelmed at times.
  • LMHinson15
    LMHinson15 Posts: 201 Member
    I really love my life, and I'm content being single.

    That said... It does get lonely sometimes. But (this will probably make me sound awful), I don't know if it isn't something a good friends-with-benefits situation couldn't cure! I mean I have great friends and amazing family, so I've got love and companionship... it's the "other" stuff that I think I'm missing :blushing:
  • Lizi19
    Lizi19 Posts: 180 Member
    I've always been single, so I think it's time for a change and I want a relationship. But after a few weeks of dating someone, I get the urge to run...
  • lacroyx
    lacroyx Posts: 5,754 Member
    I get lonely but for the most part I am good. I stay active and busy working on reaching my goal weight wise so I don't dwell on it and get sad.
  • lorro
    lorro Posts: 917 Member
    How many singles here are totally happy with being single and are just letting life take it's rounds, so to speak?



    :flowerforyou:

    Yes, that's me! Life has never been more exciting/rewarding :happy:
  • Poetic_
    Poetic_ Posts: 269 Member
    I'm fine with it now, still working on being comfortable with my new self.
  • Steelheart7
    Steelheart7 Posts: 1,056
    Totally fine with it. In fact I kinda like it tooooo! :love:
  • DMZ_1
    DMZ_1 Posts: 2,889 Member
    I don't agree with the previous posters. Not at all happy with being single. Actively looking to change.

    Single life is quite ungratifying for many reasons.

    The sexual component goes without saying. Regular sex is a great thing.

    Single life is quite burdensome. A single person has entire responsibility for cooking, cleaning, laundry and grocery shopping. Doing those tasks, in conjunction with working full time and trying to maintain a social life and develop a new relationship is physically and emotionally draining. I really don't want to have that much on my plate.

    The companionship component has benefits as well. You can't really substitute the companionship of your friends for what you'd get out of a significant other.

    The only thing worse than being single is being trapped in a bad relationship or marriage. But single life is far from what it is cracked up to be, as least for the majority of singles. There are good things about being single, like not being nagged and having freedom. But on the whole, single life pales in comparison to a good relationship.
  • La_Amazona
    La_Amazona Posts: 4,855 Member
    But I got over it and realized there are worse things than being single: Like being miserably married. Like being trapped ina relationship where your spouse pays you no attention, but you can't go out and get attention. For years.

    I like men, yes, but I'll be ok if I never "settle down" again. That's not to say that I wouldn't mind discovering someone to share my life with, because men are fun! It's just not a necessity.

    I completely agree. I feel like my eyes are wide open and I'm super aware of my feelings, the type of men I'm dating etc because I will never settle for 2nd best again.
  • pa_jorg
    pa_jorg Posts: 4,404 Member
    I don't agree with the previous posters. Not at all happy with being single. Actively looking to change.

    Single life is quite ungratifying for many reasons.

    The sexual component goes without saying. Regular sex is a great thing.

    Single life is quite burdensome. A single person has entire responsibility for cooking, cleaning, laundry and grocery shopping. Doing those tasks, in conjunction with working full time and trying to maintain a social life and develop a new relationship is physically and emotionally draining. I really don't want to have that much on my plate.

    The companionship component has benefits as well. You can't really substitute the companionship of your friends for what you'd get out of a significant other.

    The only thing worse than being single is being trapped in a bad relationship or marriage. But single life is far from what it is cracked up to be, as least for the majority of singles. There are good things about being single, like not being nagged and having freedom. But on the whole, single life pales in comparison to a good relationship.

    I could not have said it better!
  • AllanMisner
    AllanMisner Posts: 4,140 Member
    I might just turn out like the male equivalent of the woman with all the cats.
  • Carl01
    Carl01 Posts: 9,307 Member
    I am torn on this one as I do like the freedom to more or less do as I please,whenever I want to outside of work commitment.

    Still though there is just something that seems unnatural about not having someone to share life with.
    I wonder if the the subject was changed from single to alone if the feelings stay the same from everyone.
  • Learning2LuvLindsay
    Learning2LuvLindsay Posts: 1,142 Member
    I don't agree with the previous posters. Not at all happy with being single. Actively looking to change.

    Single life is quite ungratifying for many reasons.

    The sexual component goes without saying. Regular sex is a great thing.

    Single life is quite burdensome. A single person has entire responsibility for cooking, cleaning, laundry and grocery shopping. Doing those tasks, in conjunction with working full time and trying to maintain a social life and develop a new relationship is physically and emotionally draining. I really don't want to have that much on my plate.

    The companionship component has benefits as well. You can't really substitute the companionship of your friends for what you'd get out of a significant other.

    The only thing worse than being single is being trapped in a bad relationship or marriage. But single life is far from what it is cracked up to be, as least for the majority of singles. There are good things about being single, like not being nagged and having freedom. But on the whole, single life pales in comparison to a good relationship.


    I agree! I hate being single. However, I got out of a HORRIBLE relationship four months ago and that was by far way worse than being single. I think the biggest thing for me is all my friends are either married, engaged, or in a relationship. That always makes me the third wheel. :grumble:
  • Steelheart7
    Steelheart7 Posts: 1,056
    Single life is quite burdensome. A single person has entire responsibility for cooking, cleaning, laundry and grocery shopping.

    Yeh .. I did all this while I was married taking care of a child and working full time .. so, being single to me means that I also don't have to take care of his **** too.
  • garnetsms
    garnetsms Posts: 10,018 Member
    I don't agree with the previous posters. Not at all happy with being single. Actively looking to change.

    Single life is quite ungratifying for many reasons.

    The sexual component goes without saying. Regular sex is a great thing.

    Single life is quite burdensome. A single person has entire responsibility for cooking, cleaning, laundry and grocery shopping. Doing those tasks, in conjunction with working full time and trying to maintain a social life and develop a new relationship is physically and emotionally draining. I really don't want to have that much on my plate.

    The companionship component has benefits as well. You can't really substitute the companionship of your friends for what you'd get out of a significant other.

    The only thing worse than being single is being trapped in a bad relationship or marriage. But single life is far from what it is cracked up to be, as least for the majority of singles. There are good things about being single, like not being nagged and having freedom. But on the whole, single life pales in comparison to a good relationship.

    You hit the nail on the head, my friend!!!

    For me, its not that I can't handle doing all those things alone...I don't have to like it. People tell me I have my sons, but its just not the same thing!!!Granted, they do keep me busy, but I miss having someone there to do those things with me.
  • jenbit
    jenbit Posts: 4,252 Member
    I like having my freedom to do what I want.... But I wouldnt mind dating someone again. Really I dont think about it much .....
  • DMZ_1
    DMZ_1 Posts: 2,889 Member
    I don't agree with the previous posters. Not at all happy with being single. Actively looking to change.

    Single life is quite ungratifying for many reasons.

    The sexual component goes without saying. Regular sex is a great thing.

    Single life is quite burdensome. A single person has entire responsibility for cooking, cleaning, laundry and grocery shopping. Doing those tasks, in conjunction with working full time and trying to maintain a social life and develop a new relationship is physically and emotionally draining. I really don't want to have that much on my plate.

    The companionship component has benefits as well. You can't really substitute the companionship of your friends for what you'd get out of a significant other.

    The only thing worse than being single is being trapped in a bad relationship or marriage. But single life is far from what it is cracked up to be, as least for the majority of singles. There are good things about being single, like not being nagged and having freedom. But on the whole, single life pales in comparison to a good relationship.


    I think the biggest thing for me is all my friends are either married, engaged, or in a relationship. That always makes me the third wheel. :grumble:

    That is a quite unpleasant feeling. I can count the number of couples on one hand and have fingers left over when I was hanging out with them & things flowed well and it all had a natural feeling to it.
  • garnetsms
    garnetsms Posts: 10,018 Member
    I don't agree with the previous posters. Not at all happy with being single. Actively looking to change.

    Single life is quite ungratifying for many reasons.

    The sexual component goes without saying. Regular sex is a great thing.

    Single life is quite burdensome. A single person has entire responsibility for cooking, cleaning, laundry and grocery shopping. Doing those tasks, in conjunction with working full time and trying to maintain a social life and develop a new relationship is physically and emotionally draining. I really don't want to have that much on my plate.

    The companionship component has benefits as well. You can't really substitute the companionship of your friends for what you'd get out of a significant other.

    The only thing worse than being single is being trapped in a bad relationship or marriage. But single life is far from what it is cracked up to be, as least for the majority of singles. There are good things about being single, like not being nagged and having freedom. But on the whole, single life pales in comparison to a good relationship.


    I think the biggest thing for me is all my friends are either married, engaged, or in a relationship. That always makes me the third wheel. :grumble:

    That is a quite unpleasant feeling. I can count the number of couples on one hand and have fingers left over when I was hanging out with them & things flowed well and it all had a natural feeling to it.

    OH Yes, know that third wheel feeling all to well! This does not only include friends but my family...
  • JanieJack
    JanieJack Posts: 3,831 Member
    Single life is quite burdensome. A single person has entire responsibility for cooking, cleaning, laundry and grocery shopping.

    Um..yeah...so...? I had to do all that, and bring in all the income, with a non-contributing partner.

    So from my perspective being single is a lot more fun, a lot less work, and much easier on my finances.
  • AllanMisner
    AllanMisner Posts: 4,140 Member
    The sexual component goes without saying. Regular sex is a great thing.

    There is nothing preventing a single person from having sex regularly.

    Single life is quite burdensome. A single person has entire responsibility for cooking, cleaning, laundry and grocery shopping. Doing those tasks, in conjunction with working full time and trying to maintain a social life and develop a new relationship is physically and emotionally draining. I really don't want to have that much on my plate.

    I hired a housekeeper so the laundry and cleaning are done. I cook when I want to (go out when I don't want to cook). Since I started using MFP, I'm enjoying grocery shoppng more as I try to find foods I see my friends eating (i.e., Greek yogurt vs what I was eating). And when I do these things, I can do them when and how I choose. No offense to the women, but many of them don't understand waiting until the game is over to wash dishes or take the trash out.

    The companionship component has benefits as well. You can't really substitute the companionship of your friends for what you'd get out of a significant other.
    I have some really good friends that I talk, chat, and email regularly. I have plants I tell my troubles to. I'm a very fortunate man to have both.

    The only thing worse than being single is being trapped in a bad relationship or marriage. But single life is far from what it is cracked up to be, as least for the majority of singles. There are good things about being single, like not being nagged and having freedom. But on the whole, single life pales in comparison to a good relationship.
    I completely agree. A bad relationship is worth taking your time and remaining single until the right time/woman comes along. I'm focused on loving myself first. If/when it happens, great. But I'm not rushing in or thinking I'm missing something. And my plants agree with me.
  • Bikini27
    Bikini27 Posts: 1,290 Member
    I am torn on this one as I do like the freedom to more or less do as I please,whenever I want to outside of work commitment.

    Still though there is just something that seems unnatural about not having someone to share life with.
    I wonder if the the subject was changed from single to alone if the feelings stay the same from everyone.

    I understand. I guess I don't consider myself alone, but then when I get a touch lonely, I boot up the computer and see what's cooking.

    I think it is easy to say we prefer it because there has not been that one great person to enter our lives and make us go, "Wow, this is what I have been missing."

    And no matter how I say I love being single, for all of the superficial and deep reasons that it may be, I still hold out hope of finding that man that stands beside me and shares his life with me, and vice versa.
  • Bikini27
    Bikini27 Posts: 1,290 Member
    Single life is quite burdensome. A single person has entire responsibility for cooking, cleaning, laundry and grocery shopping.

    Yeh .. I did all this while I was married taking care of a child and working full time .. so, being single to me means that I also don't have to take care of his **** too.

    When I was married, it all fell on my shoulders any how, but now I only have to cook for one :wink:
  • Bikini27
    Bikini27 Posts: 1,290 Member
    The sexual component goes without saying. Regular sex is a great thing.

    There is nothing preventing a single person from having sex regularly.

    Single life is quite burdensome. A single person has entire responsibility for cooking, cleaning, laundry and grocery shopping. Doing those tasks, in conjunction with working full time and trying to maintain a social life and develop a new relationship is physically and emotionally draining. I really don't want to have that much on my plate.

    I hired a housekeeper so the laundry and cleaning are done. I cook when I want to (go out when I don't want to cook). Since I started using MFP, I'm enjoying grocery shoppng more as I try to find foods I see my friends eating (i.e., Greek yogurt vs what I was eating). And when I do these things, I can do them when and how I choose. No offense to the women, but many of them don't understand waiting until the game is over to wash dishes or take the trash out.

    The companionship component has benefits as well. You can't really substitute the companionship of your friends for what you'd get out of a significant other.
    I have some really good friends that I talk, chat, and email regularly. I have plants I tell my troubles to. I'm a very fortunate man to have both.

    The only thing worse than being single is being trapped in a bad relationship or marriage. But single life is far from what it is cracked up to be, as least for the majority of singles. There are good things about being single, like not being nagged and having freedom. But on the whole, single life pales in comparison to a good relationship.
    I completely agree. A bad relationship is worth taking your time and remaining single until the right time/woman comes along. I'm focused on loving myself first. If/when it happens, great. But I'm not rushing in or thinking I'm missing something. And my plants agree with me.

    Ok, responded to that *so* much better than I could have.
    Thank you!
  • pammbroo
    pammbroo Posts: 550 Member
    I joke about becoming the Crazy Cat Lady or teasing my 18 year old son that I hope his future wife likes me b/c I am SO his problem!! lol Have always been single and will say that I enjoy my independence for the most part. I've raised a healthy, happy kid, have a great job/home and have made huge strides both mentally and physically for myself. All great stuff but...

    I will admit that I do get lonely. Most of my friends are married and although they don't ever make me feel like the odd man out, I do feel it sometimes. Dating for me is challenging in that I get one of three things....only wants to be friends OR only wants to get laid OR spend some enjoyable time together and *POOF* gone (my latest chapter). So with that said...

    I enjoy my life, my pets (2 cats and a big goofy dog), and the wonderful circle of friends I have, continue to work on my goals and hope that one day I will be surprised. And if it doesn't happen, I know that I will be A-OK. :happy:
  • garnetsms
    garnetsms Posts: 10,018 Member
    I joke about becoming the Crazy Cat Lady or teasing my 18 year old son that I hope his future wife likes me b/c I am SO his problem!! lol Have always been single and will say that I enjoy my independence for the most part. I've raised a healthy, happy kid, have a great job/home and have made huge strides both mentally and physically for myself. All great stuff but...

    I will admit that I do get lonely. Most of my friends are married and although they don't ever make me feel like the odd man out, I do feel it sometimes. Dating for me is challenging in that I get one of three things....only wants to be friends OR only wants to get laid OR spend some enjoyable time together and *POOF* gone (my latest chapter). So with that said...

    I enjoy my life, my pets (2 cats and a big goofy dog), and the wonderful circle of friends I have, continue to work on my goals and hope that one day I will be surprised. And if it doesn't happen, I know that I will be A-OK. :happy:

    One of my favorite lines that I say is "If I can not find a good man, at least I raised one, my future daughter in law will thank me someday (although I do not take all the credit, that goes to God).

    Although I do not like being single, I know I'm gonna be okay too. All in all, I am thankful for what I do have.
  • DMZ_1
    DMZ_1 Posts: 2,889 Member
    The sexual component goes without saying. Regular sex is a great thing.

    There is nothing preventing a single person from having sex regularly.

    Single life is quite burdensome. A single person has entire responsibility for cooking, cleaning, laundry and grocery shopping. Doing those tasks, in conjunction with working full time and trying to maintain a social life and develop a new relationship is physically and emotionally draining. I really don't want to have that much on my plate.

    I hired a housekeeper so the laundry and cleaning are done. I cook when I want to (go out when I don't want to cook). Since I started using MFP, I'm enjoying grocery shoppng more as I try to find foods I see my friends eating (i.e., Greek yogurt vs what I was eating). And when I do these things, I can do them when and how I choose. No offense to the women, but many of them don't understand waiting until the game is over to wash dishes or take the trash out.

    The companionship component has benefits as well. You can't really substitute the companionship of your friends for what you'd get out of a significant other.
    I have some really good friends that I talk, chat, and email regularly. I have plants I tell my troubles to. I'm a very fortunate man to have both.

    The only thing worse than being single is being trapped in a bad relationship or marriage. But single life is far from what it is cracked up to be, as least for the majority of singles. There are good things about being single, like not being nagged and having freedom. But on the whole, single life pales in comparison to a good relationship.
    I completely agree. A bad relationship is worth taking your time and remaining single until the right time/woman comes along. I'm focused on loving myself first. If/when it happens, great. But I'm not rushing in or thinking I'm missing something. And my plants agree with me.

    1. True, there is nothing that prevents a single person from having frequent, casual, unattached sex, but it is a statistically improbability. What is frequent? A subjective term.
    2. Not all of us can afford a housekeeper.
    3. I have good friends as well, but it's not the same. I don't have plants though. Maybe that is the secret! :laugh:
This discussion has been closed.