Not "dealing with it", but "rockin' it/groovin' in" role mod
Options
renkath
Posts: 91 Member
In some ways I am lucky not to have a mother or father to tell me what aging has to be like.
I get to pick my role models.
Some things I remind myself these days:
I am actually starting to like the fact that I don't feel a need to compete with other women. Not to say that I am not/don't want to be sexually attractive to anyone, but actually giving up the idea of competing or needing to meet anyone's expectations of physical appearance has been liberating. At the age of 45, I feel like I am more genuine that I have ever been before.
I also feel stronger. I ran in my 20s, but didn't have any upper body strength. I guess I wouldn't be able to drink and party all night and make it to work the next day now, but I honestly don't miss that. I have better balance (physically and mentally) and dare to risk more, push more.
I have never experienced that losing weight was easy. If I watched what I ate and worked out regularly, I was trim... if I didn't, I wasn't. In my thirties, I noticed that I was gaining more - but it was because I wasn't going through periods of activity as often as before. Easy to blame age, but more realistic for me to blame domestic routine than metabolism.
http://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/02/sports/runner-kathy-martin-60-is-speeding-through-records.html?_r=1&ref=exercise
"Recent medical research shows that many of the ravages of aging are not so much inevitable as voluntary. Muscles do not have to shrivel, joints do not have to stiffen. Earlier expectations of physical deterioration were based on studies of sedentary people. But there is a marked difference in durability between the fat and the fit, the layers and the players. People who continue to exercise intensively have a much slower rate of decline."
This isn't to say that I don't sometimes freak out about getting older. Of course I do. I have always looked older than I am. At 10, I looked 14; at 18, I looked 25... and now at 45, people tend to think I am 55. I am no no way thrilled about that. But I have more energy than almost all of my 18 year-old students. I have plans for the next year, plans for the next decade, and for the next half of my life (if I am so lucky)... *and* I have a better understanding of what really does make me happy. I pretty sure I'd rather people think I am a happy and exciting 55 year old, rather than an unhappy 40 year-old trying to be 20.
And I am hoping that it will be like watching my kids grow up. When they were infants I couldn't bear the thought of them going to school. When the time actually came, I was okay with it. When they were 12, I couldn't bear the thought of them leaving home. My oldest will be off to college this fall. I am surprisingly okay with that ...
I am hoping that, as the signs of aging appear, I will always be ready to accept them, too. At least on good days.
So who are your role models for people who are living the great life, and not just posing for pretty obit picts.?
I get to pick my role models.
Some things I remind myself these days:
I am actually starting to like the fact that I don't feel a need to compete with other women. Not to say that I am not/don't want to be sexually attractive to anyone, but actually giving up the idea of competing or needing to meet anyone's expectations of physical appearance has been liberating. At the age of 45, I feel like I am more genuine that I have ever been before.
I also feel stronger. I ran in my 20s, but didn't have any upper body strength. I guess I wouldn't be able to drink and party all night and make it to work the next day now, but I honestly don't miss that. I have better balance (physically and mentally) and dare to risk more, push more.
I have never experienced that losing weight was easy. If I watched what I ate and worked out regularly, I was trim... if I didn't, I wasn't. In my thirties, I noticed that I was gaining more - but it was because I wasn't going through periods of activity as often as before. Easy to blame age, but more realistic for me to blame domestic routine than metabolism.
http://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/02/sports/runner-kathy-martin-60-is-speeding-through-records.html?_r=1&ref=exercise
"Recent medical research shows that many of the ravages of aging are not so much inevitable as voluntary. Muscles do not have to shrivel, joints do not have to stiffen. Earlier expectations of physical deterioration were based on studies of sedentary people. But there is a marked difference in durability between the fat and the fit, the layers and the players. People who continue to exercise intensively have a much slower rate of decline."
This isn't to say that I don't sometimes freak out about getting older. Of course I do. I have always looked older than I am. At 10, I looked 14; at 18, I looked 25... and now at 45, people tend to think I am 55. I am no no way thrilled about that. But I have more energy than almost all of my 18 year-old students. I have plans for the next year, plans for the next decade, and for the next half of my life (if I am so lucky)... *and* I have a better understanding of what really does make me happy. I pretty sure I'd rather people think I am a happy and exciting 55 year old, rather than an unhappy 40 year-old trying to be 20.
And I am hoping that it will be like watching my kids grow up. When they were infants I couldn't bear the thought of them going to school. When the time actually came, I was okay with it. When they were 12, I couldn't bear the thought of them leaving home. My oldest will be off to college this fall. I am surprisingly okay with that ...
I am hoping that, as the signs of aging appear, I will always be ready to accept them, too. At least on good days.
So who are your role models for people who are living the great life, and not just posing for pretty obit picts.?
0
Replies
-
Great posting!!!
My aunt who is 80 years old this year. She cross-country skiis, hikes, camps, gardens, volunteers. Age did not slow her down that's for sure.
I work with a bunch of 20 year old girls and I can certainly see myself in them when I was that age. I too enjoy that I have gained the self-confidence through my life experience and learned to be humbled and learned that clawing my way to get what I want isn't going to make me happy.0 -
"Ravages of aging". Wow, that's pretty much how I feel. When I was my young, 50 year olds were OLD. I, however, refuse to go gracefully into stretchy pants and one-piece bathing suits with little skirts on them. You are so right about the domestic routine being at fault. I'm just not as active as I used to be. Not because I can't, it just turned out that way.
My girlfriends are my role models. Because of our friendly competitive nature being a great incentive we are all turning 50 and rocking it. We're beginning to see our mother's in ourselves which is a giant slap of reality. I'm doing all I can to stay away from girdles and botox but I sure wish the elasticity of my skin would react like my muscles do when I lift weights and exercise!0
