Red Flags

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Replies

  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
    Any sentence with ..."Well just so you know ahead of time, no girlfriend of mine would be allowed to ___________ because I wouldnt want to have to explain that to my friends."

    Also - leaving something important at your house and saying - "this is very important to me, im leaving it here so you cant bail without talking to me and seeing me at least once more to return it."

    Also - "dont talk to me live on twitter, i dont want my followers to think im not single anymore"

    Also - early tendencies to get you to do anything via a guilt trip

    Also - if he ever grabs your arm and pulls you back toward him as you walk past him for any reasons other than to kiss you or keep you from getting run over.
  • j4nash
    j4nash Posts: 1,719 Member
    Talking about how hard her job is. It's your job. You should be good at it. And hate to break it to you, but if you leave the world isn't ending.
    Saying she wants someone to support her financially
    Apparent lack of direction in her life
    Talking about her exes. I don't care. I never will care. They're an ex for a reason.
    Asking why I'm divorced. I hate that. This applies to online dating.
    Women that only have guy friends. If you only have guy friends that signals that you're not good at dealing with conflict as it is typical in a group of females setting. Plus you're hanging out with guys all the time. It's awkward.
  • Carl01
    Carl01 Posts: 9,307 Member
    Consistency,I know everyone will have bad moments and days but there needs to be some level of reacting the same way to the same thing on a regular basis.

    Moodiness,if one day she is bubbly and almost silly and the next day sullen and withdrawn then back again to giddy it will be torment eventually

    Playing mind games,a continual version of "Does this make my butt look big" either looking for some unknown validation or insecurities.
    Take me as I am and do not try to test me,it is not cute,it is annoying.

    Being self centered,wanting it all is human,understanding that having it all only comes if you are willing to give yourself first is maturity.
    If you can tell me in detail what you want from me then you should just as easily tell in equal detail what you will give and how you will treat me.
  • Lizi19
    Lizi19 Posts: 180 Member
    What are some of your red flags in online and in person dating???

    One of mine is when a guy talks nonstop about himself and doesn't ask any questions about me.

    I definitely agree with you. I also hate it when guys spend 15 minutes(or longer) talking nonstop about a subject I am obviously not interested in, like Steve Jobs.
  • AnnaPixie
    AnnaPixie Posts: 7,439 Member
    Asking why I'm divorced. I hate that. This applies to online dating.


    That's an interesting one. I think I would ask most guys at some point why their previous relationship broke down. I think its to do with not wanting to make the same mistake? Like one guy said that his wife didnt get dressed till 3pm and I thought, "oh great, I always get dressed in the morn".....or he might say he didnt like her getting drink, I'd think "uh oh, I like my wine"

    So, its just a gauge to compatiblity, I think. Why do you hate it, if you dont mind me asking?? :flowerforyou:
  • AnnaPixie
    AnnaPixie Posts: 7,439 Member
    Massive red flag: small boobs.

    Seriously?

    - People whose head is being eaten by a fish on their profile pics.

    :laugh: yeah, those fin type people are really scaly!!

    - People who snore.


    you're funny! :yawn:
  • AnnaPixie
    AnnaPixie Posts: 7,439 Member

    Moodiness,if one day she is bubbly and almost silly and the next day sullen and withdrawn then back again to giddy it will be torment eventually

    yeah, I hate miserable people.......booo! I know we can't be happy all the time, but Jeez, share some love most days :flowerforyou:
  • Jules0336
    Jules0336 Posts: 137 Member
    Complaining about an ex, or talking about the amount of support you have to pay. That really bothers me and sends me in the other direction.
  • Nerple
    Nerple Posts: 1,291 Member
    Talking about how hard her job is. It's your job. You should be good at it. And hate to break it to you, but if you leave the world isn't ending.
    Saying she wants someone to support her financially
    Apparent lack of direction in her life

    Agree on these 3, especially the first two. I'll run the moment I hear the second one (Usually in the form of wanting to be/expecting to be a stay at home mom)

    The first one when I hear I just check out of the conversation. Almost everyone thinks their job is hard, and I dont ook forward toa future of complaining every night.
  • JanieJack
    JanieJack Posts: 3,831 Member
    Asking why I'm divorced. I hate that. This applies to online dating.

    Just at first? or always? I'm curious because I think it's a very important question to eventually ask. It's how I found out one guy I'd gone out with a couple times had had a series of affairs.
  • j4nash
    j4nash Posts: 1,719 Member
    Asking why I'm divorced. I hate that. This applies to online dating.

    Just at first? or always? I'm curious because I think it's a very important question to eventually ask. It's how I found out one guy I'd gone out with a couple times had had a series of affairs.

    On the first date. Has happened on 90% of dates stemming from on-line dating. I don't mind after a few dates because it's a relevant discussion but I don't ever ask someone why their last relationship failed on date #1.
  • j4nash
    j4nash Posts: 1,719 Member
    Asking why I'm divorced. I hate that. This applies to online dating.


    That's an interesting one. I think I would ask most guys at some point why their previous relationship broke down. I think its to do with not wanting to make the same mistake? Like one guy said that his wife didnt get dressed till 3pm and I thought, "oh great, I always get dressed in the morn".....or he might say he didnt like her getting drink, I'd think "uh oh, I like my wine"

    So, its just a gauge to compatiblity, I think. Why do you hate it, if you dont mind me asking?? :flowerforyou:

    I don't mind it, as stated earlier, it comes up on the first date. "So.... why are you divorced". argh.
  • DMZ_1
    DMZ_1 Posts: 2,889 Member
    Massive red flag: small boobs.

    Why are small boobs a red flag?
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,329 Member
    online :
    - people who have 1 sentence devoted to telling you about themselves and 8 paragraphs about the type woman they are looking for
    - anyone who says "no drama, no cheaters or liars" or anything like that. i'm a firm believer that like attracts like. anyone having trouble with liars, cheaters and drama queens are more than likely the same themselves
    - guys who seem to relish not owning a TV or have a bunch of obscure likes. it just screams that they are trying to make themselves more interesting than they already are. especially since after you meet them and you realize within one date that they watch more reality tv than anyone you've ever known.
    - anyone clearly using a picture several years old and claiming to be the age in that photo. it's like yeah dude, you were 40 years old 15 years ago.

    offline :
    - guys who have clearly lied about their height or age. neither are necessarily important to me, but the way i see it, if someone is going to lie about something so stupid and so easily caught on date 1, i'm going to think what else is he lying about that i don't know about
    - guys who are rude to the wait staff or any other service people
    - guys who check their phone or text while on the first few dates
    - guys who say things like "i'm very busy" or "i'm always on the go". IME, this has just been a way to lay a foundation down for a quasi "there when i want it but only when i want it" relationship
  • AnnaPixie
    AnnaPixie Posts: 7,439 Member
    Asking why I'm divorced. I hate that. This applies to online dating.


    That's an interesting one. I think I would ask most guys at some point why their previous relationship broke down. I think its to do with not wanting to make the same mistake? Like one guy said that his wife didnt get dressed till 3pm and I thought, "oh great, I always get dressed in the morn".....or he might say he didnt like her getting drink, I'd think "uh oh, I like my wine"

    So, its just a gauge to compatiblity, I think. Why do you hate it, if you dont mind me asking?? :flowerforyou:

    I don't mind it, as stated earlier, it comes up on the first date. "So.... why are you divorced". argh.

    ah ok, thanks for clarifying :flowerforyou:
  • MissingMinnesota
    MissingMinnesota Posts: 7,486 Member
    Red Flags in guys
    - Always saying how ugly they are when you complement them
    - Wears Ed Hardy/Affliction clothes (even worse when it is skin tight)
    -Says they hate a certain type of music (this makes me think they are close minded)
    -Always talks about partying/drinking (I am a social drinker but there is a point where it seems that is the only way they can be happy is to be drinking)
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