Advice re: sister?
mrs_dwr
Posts: 189 Member
This Sunday, we'll be heading 'home' to visit family and I'm wondering about talking to my almost-20 year old sister about losing weight. Part of me says 'no way, she won't want to hear it, you should just not broach the subject in case you hurt her feelings' but part of me says 'I care about her and want her to be healthy, especially with her whole life still ahead of her.' I know she has a couple reasons/excuses for her weight, like potential PCOS (it hasn't been totally confirmed by the dr, though they've checked for it) and the fact that she just started working a 2nd job and lives at home (no time to exercise and eats what my mom cooks).
Thoughts??
Thoughts??
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Replies
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you probably know how your sister will react - good or bad.
i have 2 younger brothers and i am ABSOLUTELY sure that i know whats good for them (hahahaha!) , but when i start yappin', i can literally see their eyes glaze over. my new strategy has been to just talk about it to someone else with them in earshot...
you could talk AROUND her aboput how great you've been feeling lately and the great support system here and hope that she tunes in and gets interested on her own. b/c as most of us know, no body will make a real change till they're good and ready!0 -
Honestly I wouldn't say anything direct unless she asks. She probably knows she needs to lose weight but for whatever reason just isn't there yet. If she brings it up then definitely say something. Or you could say something in passing about EM2WL and about how good you feel, etc.0
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Honestly I wouldn't say anything direct unless she asks. She probably knows she needs to lose weight but for whatever reason just isn't there yet. If she brings it up then definitely say something. Or you could say something in passing about EM2WL and about how good you feel, etc.
I agree but only because I know how I would have reacted. I would see if she notices you've lost any weight, or if she asks how you've been you can maybe mention EM2WL, etc. I think the big thing with losing weight is that you have to be ready. But if you can somehow slip in info about EM2WL, she might see it's not so bad!0 -
I agree with the others...just be an example, talk about it, but not directly to her about it perhaps unless she specifically asks and only give as much info as she's ready to hear. Just plant a seed for now if that's all you can do...she'll come back for more info when she's ready.
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I would take the "lead by example" route. Let her see you eating as wonderful as I am sure you do and she will take mental note of that.
I have family and friends ask me questions about what I eat and I am glad to answer them. I know for a fact that if I were to aproach the subject with my twin sister who is overweight, she would not take it too well.
GOOD LUCK!!0 -
You know your sister best, if you have done many things in the past together and she has sought out your advice in the past or taken unsolicited advice from you with no problems then I would say yes, but I suspect that because you are asking here it is something you are unsure of. If you are unsure of her reaction I would say no. Weight, even if it is only a small amount, can be a very touchy subject for most people. You can set a good example by eating well, eating healthy and if you are asked you can share your knowledge. It is a tough one for sure!0
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encourage her to join you in some sort of exercise..
then maybe talk about it while you brag just a little bit about how great you feel and are doing..
might make her want some results too..0 -
Honestly I wouldn't say anything direct unless she asks. She probably knows she needs to lose weight but for whatever reason just isn't there yet. If she brings it up then definitely say something. Or you could say something in passing about EM2WL and about how good you feel, etc.
I agree with this.0 -
I guess the main thing is I can't really be 'an example' to her for *amazing weight loss, how'd you do it??* since I've never really been overweight. I'm a size 10 with an aim for 4-6ish. My biggest goal is to try to lose/tighten up everything from my recent twin pregnancy. My main concern is that she simply doesn't eat enough. Her jobs keep her on her feet (Disney and retail) and she once told me she eats a piece of toast for breakfast, if she eats anything at all. :frown:
So okay, I'll just try to mention it in her presence and hope she asks for more info or something. The hardest thing is that I rarely see her (we live in different states) and never talk on the phone (my family isn't big on phone calls for some reason) so if she has questions later, I won't know about them. And I'm afraid that she'll try a VLCD because they 'work' short-term.0 -
encourage her to join you in some sort of exercise..
That's a good idea, too. :flowerforyou:0 -
And I'm afraid that she'll try a VLCD because they 'work' short-term.
but we all had to see that for ourselves to believe it
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encourage her to join you in some sort of exercise..
That's a good idea, too. :flowerforyou:
Yes! I was amazed that when I asked my mom to come to a zumba class with me - she did! Now she goes once a week! Sometimes people are afraid to try new physical activity on their own, so if you bring it up, she might wanna join. Make sure you tell her she can go at her own pace or that you won't kill her :-)
And don't say it's for eight loss, just say you think it'd be fun for both of you. Zumba is really fun - or a walk or hike can be nice depending on the area.0 -
Bsinno: very true.
Thanks, everybody, for the advice! Now I'll just hope for a miracle and she comes right out and asks, lol! :laugh:0 -
Be sure to be very careful when talking weight. My husband has been talking lately about how he hates his pop belly (we don't drink beer) and his little man boobs. I mean he gets downright depressed. So I got him some Tae Bo tapes the other day. He lit up like a christmas tree when he saw them, but he won't use them. I know he eats poorly but doesn't want to change that either. Tried to talk to him about it this morning and we got into a fight. I ended the fight by taking his hand, looking in his eyes and saying that when he was ready he can join me at the table and the work outs. He said no promises, but ok.0
