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Lets make this a reality.
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I laid my eyes on a sweet piece of eye candy at the gym. Too bad I didn't get to talk to him this morning.
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But a little flabby *butt slap*
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Keep teasing me with peanut butter and I'll knock out those pearly whites Tiffany just cleaned.
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He did. I can't imagine being trapped in a car with your dead girlfriend for 3 days.
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On New Year's Eve several years back, a couple ran off the road and down an embankment near my house. The woman died instantly and the man was trapped down there for 3 days before they were found. I always think about that when I'm driving in bad weather. I keep a knife in my pocket so I can cut myself out if I need to and…
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Its true, I see everyone naked.
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Beansssss
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I need a new head, this one hurts too much.
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Less is more.
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Chili
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I'm beginning to wonder if going to Meet Ups are worth losing sleep over. Getting home at 10:30 sucks.
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Where do babies come from?
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https://youtu.be/_Yhyp-_hX2s
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I don't mind pumping my own. The gas station is where I find the classy hookers.
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Fresh. I had my weekly shower this morning.
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I'm glad you asked :smile: Leave behind written instructions of what you want when you die :burial or cremation, service or no service, music preferences, clothes you want to wear, where your family can find important documents, or a letter to those left behind would be comforting. Please don't die with a beard if you…
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Are unicorns real?
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Yesterday, we had a funeral for a man who shot himself. His wife gave us a list of songs to play during the visitation and service, one of the songs was 45 by Shinedown. I'd never heard it before and I was horrified when it started playing. "Staring down the barrel of a .45" aren't the lyrics anyone wants to hear at the…
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Whatchoo talking about Willis? You are the snack.
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I'll be at the Walmart gas pumps in the Mystery Machine.
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Welcome to the family!
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You don't smell it. You eat it.
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Being a medical examiner seems interesting, but I don't think its worth the hassle of getting my doctorates. When I get really stressed I go through periods when I have nightmares about loved ones dying or someone trying to murder me. I do the make-up and the deceased's hairdresser or barber usually comes to do their hair.…
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As long as your packing, size doesn't matter around here. All the ladies will tell you "Oh my gosh, its so much bigger than I expected."
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Are on aisle 7.Thank you for shopping at Walmart.
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No, but there great places to go for a walk and unwind.
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The Nightmare Before Christmas
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I heard it may be acceptable to date your cousin. There IS hope for me after all!
