Texasgntlman Member

Heck yea! If I was so lucky ;)

8 -at least his back

Wouldn't it have been nice if the bee gees had stayed alive

If Helen Redy had a sex change would she sing "I WAS woman hear me roar...now it hangs down to the floor"

Nope- I see you are all stumped so I will give the answers so we can move on: "I'll kill the *kitten* outta you" is from Lone star state of mind "That's just plain dumb and stupid"is from Support your local Sheriff. Now carry on... We left of at

At Saturday night fever "Well that's just plain dumb and stupid"

What if the guys sister Sam Cooke was introduced to Saturday night had a resemblance to Marilyn Monroe ...would she have helped him spend his dough?

Good one.. Makes me think of: How do Chinese name their kids? ..they go to the kitchen and throw silverware in the air and listen as it hits the floor - "Ching ...Chang.. Chong ..."

If Manfred Mann had some shades on so he wasn't quite so blinded...would his song have made more sense?

What if Johnny Cash got busted smuggling parts before he got his car finished?

What if ELO had really wanted to go down?

Would KC and the sunshine band be singing "twirk twirk twirk your booty" today?

What would have happened if CCR could have gotten out of LODI?

What if the Cornelius brothers had treated her like a slut?

What if the Beatles took the short straight road to her door

Where is Moscow? In the barn next to Pa's cow

What do you call the guy with no arms and no legs at the poker table? -Chip

I like that :-)

There is a whole list of jokes about a guy with no arms and no legs: I'll start it and you can ad too it. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs lying in front of the door? -Matt What do you call a man with no arms and legs floating in the lake? -Bob What do you call a man with no arms and legs beside a hole in…

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter-he won't come anyway

This one is fun to do to people.. Ask if they like a good knock-knock joke.. They say "sure" Then you say "ok- you start it.." They say "knock-knock" ...you say "whose there?" -then laugh :)

How many men does it take to change a toilet paper roll? Nobody knows because it's never been done

I think I started with that one -but it's funnier when you tell it ;)

What do you get when you throw a hand grenade in the kitchen? Linoleum blown apart (Napolian Beuanapart)

A toothless termite walked into a bar and asked "where's the Bartender (bar tender)?"

Did you hear the one about the guy who walked into a bar..? "Ouch!.. That hurt"

So sorry - I got lost in the shuffle. Didn't mean to post twice.... and give wrong quote... And answer what someone else answered... And re use movie line already used--dang yall are hard to keep up with.... now... One of the funniest movie lies to me was: "I'll kill the *kitten* outta you"

The Princess Bride "You can't handle the truth!"

Princess Bride "I'll kill the *kitten* outta you"

The shape of his beard matches the shape on his shirt