RAF_Guy Member

"oooo, what a coincidence! Before my operation I was called Bob too"

Zombieland

No t quite as funny as my fav joke of all time: A snail is at the police station. He's telling the officer on duty about how he was just mugged and robbed. "It was these two slugs!", the snail sobs. "They beat me up and took my money! "The officer asks, "Did you get a good look at them?" The snail says, "No! It all…

Funniest thing I have read since "Agent Picolax".

I run around country lanes which are used by quite a few drivers as shortcuts too and from Cardiff and always wear something bright and reflective as the come flying around some of the corners. I also have a head torch for winter evening runs, I would definitely recommend reflective gear if you are running on roads

http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Avenue-Newcastle-Backstreet-Boyhood/dp/0752468863/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1345557987&sr=8-1 Everybody I know who has read this story has said how great it is

50 Shades Generator: http://www.fiftyshadesgenerator.com/ Quite funny

The Bacon Redemption

28 Bacon Later

short-fiction.co.uk A great selection of short stories which will appeal to a wide spectrum of personalities.

The evolution of Homer!

With legs like yours, I don't blame you!

If you follow these rules form the Good Wife's guide published in 1955, then you wont be too far off the mark :tongue: Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have be thinking about him and are concerned about…

What are you like!!!

Sky + already set, I am looking forward to seeing this. I dont use any supplements, drinks etc, the only thing I do is drink a glass of milk after a session.

Well done with your running, it is brilliant. If you fancy another challenge in October, I am taking part in this in Cardiff: http://www.mhsurvival.co.uk/page1.asp

Turkey enchiladas Ingredients For the sauce 1 tbsp olive oil 1 onion, chopped 1 garlic clove, crushed 200ml/7fl oz passata 1 tsp chopped fresh oregano ½ tsp freshly ground black pepper For the turkey 1 tbsp olive oil 1 garlic clove, crushed 1 red onion, chopped 1 red pepper, seeds and core removed, finely chopped 1…

The Green Mile

My wife has one that says: "Warning, 0 to ***** in 0.6 seconds"

Got to be better than bingo wings :tongue: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=bingo%20wings

21 minutes is absolutely worth it, in fact there is a school of thought that says that after 20 minutes of exercise, the benefit you gain drops exponentially (no doubt I will get shot down for that one!) There is nothing wrong at all with adding an extra day, and why not try a bit of HIIT in there towards the end. Try…

You are a real inspiration, you have done so well, it is incredible.

Winners never quit and quitters never win

I don't think you can go too wrong with Asics: http://www.sportsdirect.com/running/asics-gel-innovate-2-mens-running-shoes-212095

In Dec 11 I was 116kgs, 255lbs or 18 stone 3lbs. I am now 102 kgs, 224lbs or 15 stone 6 lbs. 3 kgs, 6.6lbs to go until I am no longer classed as obese.

Being an England supporter is like being the over-optimistic parents of the fat kid on sports day You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.' So that was nice." "Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are 5 people…

A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He sidles up to the bar and says: "I'm looking for the man who shot my paw A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a train load of terrapins. What a turtle disaster. A man entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in 10 different puns, in the hope that at least one…

”How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F word? Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell ‘BINGO!’” “When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.”

So I met the bloke who invented crosswords today. I can't remember his name, it's P something T something R. I was reading this book today, The History Of Glue and I couldn't put it down. I phoned the local ramblers club today and this bloke just went on and on. My mate asked me "What do you think of voluntary work?? I…

"So I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss rang up, and he said 'You've been promoted.' And I swerved. And then he rang up a second time and said "You've been promoted again.' And I swerved again. He rang up a third time and said 'You're managing director.' And I went into a tree. And a policeman came up and…