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Thank you everyone for your responses. It is a relief to know I'm not kidding myself.
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It's not that I have to, but that I want to. 5 years ago I was thin and energetic and even a little adventurous. Since then I have gained a LOT of weight and I am not happy with myself anymore. I have a lot of wonderful things going on in my life but how I feel about myself is not one of them and I want to feel good about…