MegE_N Member

While this is nowhere near what you're going through, I stayed with one of my ex-boyfriends for longer than I should have because I was afraid to leave him alone. He had so few friends, hardly ever went out, etc. I was afraid he'd just wither away in a depression. I finally bit the bullet, though, and decided that just…

When I work out, I am alone. No other creature exists in the world. It's the only way I can do it. I'm very pro minding my own business. I don't like the idea of someone watching me or smiling at me during my workout. Granted, I won't take offense. But I'm pretending you're not there so I can find my zone and I'm trusting…

All I can say is that it's very good you're concerned. My mother was thin as a rail and my father over 300lbs while I was growing up. He'd clear 3 plates at dinner in the time it took me to clear one. Being an idiot child, I started to 'race' my father in my head, seeing if I could eat as much as quickly. That's been my…

I became fat as a child because I was raised by a single parent and had the freedom to make my own choices. I'd come home from school and he'd be gone until 8 o'clock at night. What's an 11 year old going to cook? Ramen, naturally, so I'd eat a lot of that. Combine that with the fact that I used to silently 'race' my dad…

Feel free to add me - right now my goal is 70 before I can try on wedding dresses, with a final goal of 100 by the time my wedding comes around next October.

I'm on 1200 technically, but I walk to and from work every day which means I usually eat around 1500 a day. I'm not doing as well as I'd like on this plan - only down about 15lbs since April - but it's sustainable and comfortable for me so I know I won't get frustrated and binge or give up. Feel free to add me.

I second the idea that she might not know she's doing it. You're focused on weight loss and food a lot, and she's not. She can't know what you're thinking, what's in your head. She may just be trying to be nice. Trying to reward you, trying to do something nice for you. I think it's a little mean to jump to the 'She's out…

While I have a lot to lose (see below, and I want to lose even more than that before my wedding next year) in my mind I look for small victories. I weigh myself every day for example, which is generally a big no-no here. But I like to see those little 0.X numbers tick downward. Some days upward, but most downward. And I…

I was in Macys a few weeks ago and they weirdly had a little bridal section. My future Mother in Law is super jazzed to take me dress shopping, and there was a lot of pressure on losing weight so we can hurry up and do that. So I said eff it, grabbed the only dress I could find that fit me (and one a size smaller) and went…

I have to lose weight. My future mother in law is desperate to take me dress shopping, but I know I won't fit into dresses in the majority of boutique places around my apartment. If I want to avoid that stress and shame, I have to lose.

I find I'm the same - I think about food far more than I ever did when I was gaining weight. But I find that it helps me. I check my pre-loaded diary throughout the day and jazz myself up - "If I can stick with this, it's going to be such a good day!" sort of thing.

Keep your hands busy. I've been making sure that every night I do housework, as much as possible. Can't eat while I'm ironing, or doing dishes, or sweeping. My house has been so clean since I started this 'diet' trick and I've avoided late night snacking! The other alternative is just to not keep that stuff in the house.…

My fiance more or less leaves me to my own devices on the weight loss front. As long as I'm doing well he lets me do my thing, and if I start to slip he'll drag me out for walks more or make gentle comments like 'We really need to watch what we eat'. That said, he is quick to applaud my successes. I don't think he's too…

If your SO can do it in a way that is supportive and respectful, I say absolutely. It sounds like your SO was both of those things - good for the both of you!

So motivational. I'M SO EXCITED TO BECOME ONE OF YOU SOMEDAY. Right now I'm about 2 months in and 15lbs down.

He calls me his drunk Irish angel, as it happens. :drinker: But I understand your point. However, if he came to me tomorrow and said 'I'm witholding marriage until you meet my standards' with no previous discussion, no attempt at open dialogue, nothing but an ultimatum ... I would have to seriously consider how committed…

Based on that assessment it's a wonder I ever found a date, much less a fiance, at 240lbs.

I guess the difference to me is 'We need to work on this,' and 'Drop and give me 20 to earn my commitment'.

I agree that it doesn't automatically mean this would turn out to be an unhealthy living situation. But anyone who ever put a stipulation on me like that for such a HUGE decision would, I think, deserve a bit of scrutiny. It's not that he mistakenly called her fat in a poor attempt to indicate his concern - he is holding…

This would make me very nervous. I'd feel pressured, always, to maintain a good weight if it meant he would leave me otherwise. What happens if I become injured, or sick, and gain weight as a result? What happens if I'm one of those women that puts on a TON of baby weight? Is he going to go find a skinny woman and say…

OK I'll give this a whirl... Three swimsuits.

I started gaining weight while with my last boyfriend about four years ago (he weighed about 350lbs at the time, I went from 200lbs to 230lbs) and while he wasn't THAT mean about it, he definitely lost a lot of interest in me. He started pulling my hair and making comments about how lucky I was to have a man who was…

I can now shop at Victoria's Secret. I won't, because too expensive and not worth it. But my old VS bras fit again. Not exactly where I wanted to lose the weight from, but I'll take it.

Oh look, the 'concern police' are out again, judging other people because they just "care so much." Go home. A person who loses 100+ lbs is much healthier than they were, even if they are still listed in the 'obese' range. It is a huge accomplishment, and anyone who has succeeded in doing so (I know I haven't) deserves all…

Yes it hurts! Also if your friends say so, why don't you believe them? Is this a joke they made up?

I'm Meg, and I am currently reading General Longstreet's autobiography, published in ~1896, called 'From Manassas to Appomattox'. Reading some of the other posts in this room though, I think I may be the wrong kind of nerd. :P

Holy mother ... what a thoughtful and useful response after all of ten minutes of this thread being open! Thank you! :)

Sitting idle. Idle hands can pick up food or alcohol and put it in your mouth - what an easy and thoughtless way to destroy a whole day of planning!

Yes, to an extent. But if you eat your 1,800 calories in junk, you'll find you're constantly hungry and feeling restricted. Just by logging what you'll eat, you'll find your habits start to change - I only have 600 calories for dinner, so I can't eat candy and ice cream because I know I'll be hungry. But that doesn't mean,…

We go to the gym together sometimes, but I don't want to know he's there. Also, we just have different styles. He likes to gym it on the elliptical for an hour, for me that's hell. I'll go for long walks and do yoga, so we mostly leave our workouts to each other.