-
What Day Is It?
https://youtu.be/xos2MnVxe-c
-
Surgery today.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q7vtWB4owdE
-
Surgery
Got the word from Loyola. Be there 5:30 AM Monday for the carving. So after Monday, I'll be gone for a while. For those who don't already know, I have esophageal cancer and they will be removing 2/3 of that and 1/3 of my stomach.
-
This week is
Elvis' Birthday Celebration Week. He'll be 85 this week. National Lose Weight/Feel Great Week. It's as easy as losing part of your stomach and esophagus. Someday We'll Laugh About This Week. Said the cop helping you into the back seat.
-
What Day Is It?
National Cuddle Up Day. Ready. Apple Tree Day. Have you finished decorating it yet? National Shortbread Day. Just one word: Nabisco Lorna Doones. National Bean Day. https://youtu.be/fEGiLUJoN7U Birthdays: Kathryn McKinnon Berthold, 35 Daryl Dixon, 50 Nigella Lucy Lawson, 59 Mr. Bean, 64
-
What Day Is It?
Fruitcake Toss Day. I thought we did this already, but, like heartburn, they keep coming back. National Keto Day. Stop killing ketos for sport. If you spot someone wearing a keto coat, splash him/her with organic paint. National Bird Day. Flip one to everyone today, especially to that slow guy in the Volvo wagon in the…
-
What Day Is It?
I decided to celebrate Festival of Sleep Day this morning.
-
What Day Is It?
Festival of Sleep Day. Today's schedule: 6:30 AM, wake up and have your coffee and breakfast. 8:00 AM, nap Noon, wake up and realize you're still in PJ's, try to get to the bathroom dry because you haven't gone yet, eat lunch. 1:00PM, nap 4:00 PM wake up and realize you're still in PJ's, go back to sleep 5:30 PM wake up to…
-
What Day Is It?
National Cream Puff Day. The ones with a filling are calorie free if you only eat just one. Take my word for it. National Buffet Day. If you eat from the salad bar first, you can do this in one trip, if the plates can handle the load. National Motivation and Inspiration Day. Aim Low, Reach Your Goals, Avoid Disappointment.…
-
What Day Is It?
Commitment Day. A good lawyer can get you out of it. Polar Bear Plunge Day. Today in Chicago, it's more like beach party day. Hot Toddy Day. Why hot? And what the hell is a toddy? I've never seen one at the zoo or growing on a toddy farm. Euro Day. How's that workin for ya Bulgaria, Croatia, Czech Republic, Denmark,…
-
What Day Is It?
Make Up Your Mind Day. Or just put it off til next year again. One Voice Day. Boy, would that make cartoons boring. Leap Second Time Adjustment Day. Midnight will be late tonight. Banished Words List Release Day. Wrap my head around, wheelhouse, in the books, grapple, yeet, collusion, anything “OTUS”. No Interruptions Day.…
-
What Week Is It?
It's About Time Week. Finally!!! Christmas Bird Count Week. 2 Tie One On For Safety Campaign Ends. Beginning January 2 we can get back to our stupid human tricks. Celebration of Life Week Begins on the First. Get outside and enjoy the bitter cold of January, the kind of cold that makes noses runny and eyebrows frosted.…
-
What Day Is It?
International Bacon Day. The holiest of holiest days. Bow your head when you approach a slab. Falling Needles Family Fest Day. No matter how you try taking a dead Christmas tree outside, you will still step barefoot on a sharp needle in June. National Bicarbonate of Soda Day. The duct tape of food additives. Festival of…
-
What Day Is It?
National Pepper Pot Day. Peter Puck picked a peck of pepper pots and threw up. Still Need To Do Day. You've successfully put it off for 362 days so far. Don't stop now. Tick Tock Day. One more reminder that it's almost too late, but then, your spouse won't let you forget. Yodel in the Shower Day. Turning on the hot water…
-
What Day Is It?
National Call a Friend Day. You know that friend you only call when you're drunk? Scare the hell out of her/him and do it sober. Dyzemas Day. Don't start. National Chocolate Candy Day. Cindy! The cocaine of candies. National Card Playing Day. Watch your back if you're dealt aces and eights. Return a Gift for the Cold Hard…
-
What Day Is It?
Make Cut Out Snowflakes Day. If you live in the God-forsaken Midwest, it's the only way you will see a snowflake this December 27, and that's just fine with me. Visit the Zoo Day. Of course, the only animals out there in the cold will be Polar Bears and Penguins. So bring a big picnic lunch because you'll have substantial…
-
What Day Is It?
National Candy Cane Day. Are you tired of them yet? National Whiner's Day. I didn't get what I hinted at for a month. I gained too much weight. I ate too much. I'm tired. Now I have to clean this place again. Uncle Oswald stayed too late. It snowed. It didn't snow. National Thank You Note Day. It's time to start hand…
-
What Day Is It?
No "L" Day. Please...don't tell me you don't get it. https://youtu.be/IxvMkSKRWOA Birthdays: Florian Cloud de Bounevialle Armstrong, 47 Ann Lennox, 64 Mary Elizabeth Spacek, 69 Barbara Ann Mandrell, 70 James William Buffett, 72
-
What Day Is It?
National Eggnog Day. Milk punch, Ian Simkins. Remember to Read the Instructions First Night. Googling this one produces unexpected fun results. Mistletoe Time. "In Anglo-Saxon, “mistel” means “dung” and “tan” means “twig,” hence, “dung-on-a-twig.” So let's kiss under the *kitten* on a stick. Feast of the Seven Fishes.…
-
What Week Is It?
What Week Is It? It's About Time Week. Finally!!! Christmas Bird Count Week. 1
-
What Day Is It?
National Pfeffernusse Day. If you can pronounce it, you can eat it. Human Light Celebration. Only skinny people allowed. that hardly seems fair. Metric Conversion Day. How many liters of gas in nine-tenths of a Euro go into your Volvo? Festivus. https://youtu.be/LTGuhioB9ZE Birthdays: Robert John Burck, 48 Edward Louis…
-
What Day Is It?
National Cookie Exchange Day. The ones you made suck? Here's your chance. Super Saturday. Or Christmas Eve Eve. Time to panic because you forgot someone. Forefathers’ Day. The day that keeps on giving Maury Povich a reason to live. Birthdays: Meghan Elizabeth Trainor, 25 Lord Voldemort , 56 Lila Diane Sawyer, 73…
-
What Day Is It?
Don't Make Your Bed Day. Or, in my place, Friday. National Flashlight Day. Because it'll be a year before you need one this early. National French Fried Shrimp Day. The best ones come in brown paper bags turned shiny by all that grease. Short Girl Appreciation Day. Short girls are always looking up, and they can nap with…
-
What Day Is It?
National Oatmeal Muffin Day. Fantastic idea! Take all of the health benefits of oatmeal and destroy them with sugar and lots of butter. Look for an Evergreen Day. When we've managed to chop them all down, what are you going to decorate for Christmas? A Corpse flower plant? National Hard Candy Day. Sponsored by the AGDA (1)…
-
What Day Is It?
National Sangria Day. Screw Driver for wine drinkers. National Re-Gifting Day. Not making note of who gave it last year can be embarrassing. Dot Your I’s Day. I don't think there is a way to write this correctly because that's an uppercase I, and if you do this with a lowercase I your grammar is out of whack, and if you…
-
What Day Is It?
Answer the Telephone Like Buddy the Elf Day. "John the elf, what's your favorite color?" This might be a challenge at work today. Flake Appreciation Day. You must appreciate me today. It's the law. National Wear a Plunger on Your Head Day. You have to cant it to the right side in your car, or just open your sunroof.…
-
What Day Is It?
National Maple Syrup Day. How many trees have to suffer wounds hideous scars for your damn pancakes? International Day to End Violence Against Sex Workers. Stop spanking your hooker. Sorry, friends, that's all for today. Anything else is serious and we don't need that. Birthdays: Milica Bogdanovna Jovovich, 43 Sarah…
-
What Weel is It?
Gluten-free Baking Week. Let's all avoid gluten because we all believe that we are in that 1% with celiac disease. Cookie Exchange Week. Your corner bakery won't mind if you walk and trade him some Lorna Dunes, for his $1 each sugar cookies. Halcyon Days Begin. The most peaceful days of the year...unless you shop til you…
-
What Day Is It?
Man Will Never Fly Memorial Society Annual Meeting. So far, they are right. Barbie and Barney Backlash Day. This is the day you can tell your kids they are not real, Barney and Barbie, that is. Your kids are real, very real. National Chocolate Covered Anything Day. Whoever first coated bacon with chocolate sits at the…
-
What Day Is It?
National Wear Your Pearls Day. Who doesn't love a beautiful pearl necklace? National Cupcake Day. Use of that term of endearment today will land you in chauvinist sexist pig prison and a $10,000 fine. National Lemon Cupcake Day. That fine just doubled. Cat Herders' Day. https://youtu.be/m_MaJDK3VNE Birthdays: Sonny…
