Motivating my family
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ChrystalJADE94
Posts: 11
Hi. I'm new to this FitnessPal program. I have a question. I'm 20 years old. I live with my family: Mom,Dad,twin sister,oldest sister and her 1 year old daughter. I've noticed over the years that my family is ADDICTED to butter and sugar. My cabinet is filled with sugary cereals, fake junk foods and sweets. I swear my sister is THE WORST grocery shopper. She usually comes home with M&M ice cream sandwiches,Doritoes, oreos, bakable cookies, Digiorno pizza,Kool-aid, frozen breakfast sandwiches ANYTHING THAT COMES PREPARED IN A BOX!THE FAKEST FOOD EVER! She'll buy a bag of grapes but I bet she thinks that these grape will balance out everything else. She "secretly" hides tons of king-sized candy in her room. Shes a closet eater.She has the worst diet. She just recently went to the hospital. ALL OF HER INTESTINES WERE INFLAMMED! ALL- OF-THEM.She constantly hurts her back and breaks her ankles(due to her weight) She has ALOT of health problems. SHES ONLY 24! My mom is addicted to butter. When we make homemade cookies or something she wants to add more butter than usual. My dad is an absent-minded eater. He will pick up anything and eat it. I'm trying to motivate my family into eating healthier because not only do I want to loose weight but I'm trying to help everyone else,but no one is listening( especially my sister. She is already feeding my niece tons of sugar. God shes 1!) My mom usually blows me off because me and my twin are the thinnest in the family.(I'm size 11-12 shes size 8-10). My dad wants to loose weight but he kinda forgets about it by the end of the day and just blames others for his weight gain. My older sister just continues to buy fake food. I know she wants to loose weight but my sister doesn't want to do anything about it because she kinda survives on the pity of others. As long as people feel sorry for her she feels content. I'm desperate to live a healthy life. I workout, I eat better but I feel like my mom is annoyed that I do that. When I told my mom that I was on a diet she bought Oreos. SHE NEVER BUYS OREOS! I want to encourage my family desperately. My parents are getting older and I'm scared for their health. My mom is going through something personal now and my dad has acid reflux.I'm scared for them. I know they both need to live healthier lives but no one is listening. How can I motivate my family to eat better? I don't want to over step my parents authority but how can I tell them respectfully? I want to push my parents but I don't want to be a drama queen and clean out the cabinets. I'm not trying to be disrespectful.
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Perhaps re post this with some paragraphs? It's pretty tough to slog through. Good luck though.0
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Sometimes people don't listen because they don't want to face their problems. Eating poorly can be a coping mechanism as well as a bad habit. I would say, for the moment, don't say anything, but instead, lead by example. Its definitely more difficult to do when all this crappy, but yummy, food is lingering around the house all of the time, but if you can resist that temptation and live a healthy lifestyle then you will become a great example of what is possible for the rest of your family.
After your family has quietly been watching your actions awhile- and the results of those actions- I would appeal to them on an individual, private basis. Tell them calmly that you, who love them very much, are worried for their health. Maybe suggest a trip to your family doctor to have a reality check-up and get some info on taking better care of themselves. Know though, that sometimes, people will not listen and you have to let them walk down their paths. They may not be able to see how much it could hurt you, but all you can do is make your feelings known. They have to choose to make a change for themselves. Perhaps when you are more financially stable, make some space by moving out. It seems that you could be in a much more positive environment.0 -
I would honestly write your parents and your sisters a letter, all individually, expressing your concerns. I think if they read it in a letter, they will feel less attacked or more like, oh okay, she is just worried about my health. Just make sure if you do do that, to make it not attacking at all, because if they get defensive, it wont do anyone any good. Good luck to you, and to your family.... This is a tough situation, and I hope it gets better for you. Just know that if they decide not to live healthier lifestyles, you at least did what you can do... Maybe one night for dinner, you can announce to your family that you will cook for them and make a nice homemade organic meal with real food ingredients, and when you guys are all eating just casually bring up that its all organic and healthy and maybe that will also reinforce that healthy food is not only good, its better tasting AND better for you.0
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THANK YOU all for your advice.0
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amanda091990 wrote: »I would honestly write your parents and your sisters a letter, all individually, expressing your concerns. I think if they read it in a letter, they will feel less attacked or more like, oh okay, she is just worried about my health. Just make sure if you do do that, to make it not attacking at all, because if they get defensive, it wont do anyone any good. Good luck to you, and to your family.... This is a tough situation, and I hope it gets better for you. Just know that if they decide not to live healthier lifestyles, you at least did what you can do... Maybe one night for dinner, you can announce to your family that you will cook for them and make a nice homemade organic meal with real food ingredients, and when you guys are all eating just casually bring up that its all organic and healthy and maybe that will also reinforce that healthy food is not only good, its better tasting AND better for you.
That's a great idea. I remarried in 2009 when I was at my heaviest and married into a family of very overweight people who eat out constantly and snack on all the wrong stuff. I changed my habits and have been working out and eating healthy trying to be an example and motivation for them. Sometimes seeing how far I've come does the opposite however. Writing a letter will let us all get our cares and concerns down on paper and let us try to put ourselves in their shoes reading it. It may take a few versions before we send it but it's a great idea for getting those thoughts across without others hearing it and making it an awkward situation.
So I'm guessing we shouldn't give this letter at Thanksgiving or Christmas right before the mashed potatoes, stuffing, and pie are handed out?
Just sayin'.0
