Looking for new, safe friends!

nineateseven

Hi! I'm kind of new to EM2WL, but I've been heading in this direction for a while. I definitely need some EM2WL friends

The more I read through my newsfeed, the more I realize I probably need to unfriend a lot of people for the sake of my own safety. They're kind, encouraging people, but almost everyone is eating at a severe calorie deficit (most aiming to net 1200) and many are using negative self-talk.

It's getting to me.

I struggled with disordered eating in high school, and those thought patterns are always lurking in the shadows. I really need to steer clear of the "eat nothing, punish my body, earn my calories" way of thinking. I made a resolution this year that I was going to work with my body, not against it, in eating, resting, and getting stronger.

Reading posts in this group - especially seeing photos of strong, healthy people - has been such a breath of fresh air.

I'll be checking in with my numbers and more info in a few days and would appreciate some feedback. I'm pretty sure I'm in between two activity factors, so I'm taking a week to see how my body is feeling with certain numbers to get a better gauge on what my body is saying. I'm also taking note of the number of calories I'm capable of consuming! I like to eat and haven't been on a strict diet or anything, but I'm only 5'3"!!

Also, any runners in this group want to be friends? I'm getting back into running after a hiatus last year and would love to meet a few running buddies

Hope everyone is staying warm!
It's snowing here ❄️
- Michele

aaliceinw

Love your post. After my health assessment, I was put on a low cal diet of 1200. I understand the tiniest bit about dieting and thought that I had to be under that and exercise like mad, because I was constantly told, "calories in = calories out and you have lots to lose".

It just was not working for me at all because I had no energy left at all after 3 weeks. I looked around and found this community and I feel much fitter, more energised and happier because I can eat real meals. It's still a long journey but I do feel it is a safer and more reasonable one.

TasnimEz

Feel free to add me if you like

nicolejo143

Hi,

I know, when I started myfitnesspal the first thing I did was try to eat 1200-1300 calories and then I added a bunch of friends trying to do the same thing. Now I think its really sad to look at a those people's diaries and see that they are under their 1200 calorie goal everyday. yikes! I started increasing my calories in October. I'm eating a little over 2000 calories a day now and I think I'm starting to lose weight finally. I'm only 5'1" and it took me a long time to get up there in cals. It takes lots of patience.

I am also a runner! Lets be friends!

nineateseven

Thanks! Sending friend requests...

I cleaned up my friend list just after I wrote the original post, and then refreshed my newsfeed. I literally felt the stress release all through my shoulders and face. It was absolutely the right thing to do.

So excited to get connected with people in this community!

heybales

Very brave of you. I mean, you'd think shoot, people you really don't know that well probably and now have different goals, who cares.
But some have trouble unfriending, thinking they are being disloyal somehow.

Good job.

mymodernbabylon

Feel free to add me. I've removed people who are under-eating and have posted about doing so, that way people know that I just can't support them at 1200 calories (or eating 1400 but burning a huge amount and then netting even less) so it'd be better for me not to have them as friends - I'll just piss them off by repeatedly asking why they are eating so little. You can do it.

Falcon

I tell those who complain about it not working anymore, and having a deficient when they're at the point where they should be eating back all their exercise cals because they're trying to lose 10 pounds at a quick rate. I tell them they're not eating enough.

I try to eat around 1600 min right to 2000 depending on how intense the exercise was.

Feel free to add me.

Jennbecca33

You can add me. It's very healthy to only have people who support your goals and are doing the same by taking care of their bodies. After all, MFP is for your own health, not socializing in the sense like fb. I love having a newsfeed full of strong, fit women who are not afraid to talk about food or who are not afraid to eat period. I started out MFP with a girl who has continued to log in every single day like I have for a year - neither of us knew about EM2WL at first but when I found the group, I messaged her and asked her to do it with me. She chose not to and continued to eat very low cal. I remained friends with her because I wanted to see how her progress went. We have lost the same amount of weight this last year - around 40 lbs each. I did it working out around 3 times a week for 30 minutes eating 1900-2000 cals average daily (I'm 5'3 too) and she did it eating around 1200 daily - and she's taller than I am and weighed more. We can do it the hard way or the easier way - the easier way takes care of our bodies. I know she has struggled through her 40 pounds and veered away a few times and has managed to maintain so far, but I just wonder how long can someone really maintain eating that low of calories. Not long, from my past 20 years experience. If you are going to start running, you'll have high calorie burns and will need to eat to support that activity.

Great job getting your head wrapped around it - you'll do great!

lovtolaff

I tell those who complain about it not working anymore, and having a deficient when they're at the point where they should be eating back all their exercise cals because they're trying to lose 10 pounds at a quick rate. I tell them they're not eating enough.

My male roommate started a "diet" this month and feels like eating anything over 700-1000 calories is TOO much. He usually eats once a day and it's something like a salad (with very little meat) or a wrap. I have tried telling him that he is not eating enough over and over but have given up b/c it can lead to some heated discussion and my blood pressure can't take it lol Not to mention the fact that he can really be quite a diva at times, especially if he feels like you are questioning him on the right way to do things. So sadly, I have had to let it go and just keep doing what I'm doing b/c I know that it works for me. No I may not drop 10 lbs as quickly as him but I feel good and I am not exhausted from not fueling my body like I am supposed to. I also feel like I can stick to this way of eating/exercising b/c I really don't feel deprived.

When he's around at meal time I have to remind myself that I do not need to justify to anyone what or how much I'm eating b/c I know I'm doing the right thing and feel like I can sustain this plan for the long term. I could very possibly be projecting my feelings onto him and he may not be silently questioning my choices, but I kind of doubt it. lol

Anyways - just wanted to chime in and let you know you aren't alone and heck I LIVE with THAT person that thinks you can't eat anything good if you want to lose weight. The struggle is real! lol

leooftheyear

I recently found this page as well and it has been a huge help mentally switching from eating 1700-1900 calories/day to 2200-2400/day. I has been a struggle for me because it has always been drilled into my head to eat less calories and exercise more. I remember being in high school and college going to bed HUNGRY because I was eating the tiny portions my mom felt were good and then binging on the candy I had stashed away in my room and then wondering why my weight wasn't budging.... I've tried EVERYTHING I can possibly think of (low calorie/high exercise, low calorie/weight training, weight watchers, etc). But it wasn't until I started reading New Rules of Lifting for Women and found this group that everything start clicking for me.

Feel free to add me as well

nineateseven

You guys are amazing. Thank you so much for the encouragement! Friend requests have been sent

I wrote a blog post this morning because I realized I lost an inch off my waist and hips between yesterday and today. And I ate 2187 calories. Lost an inch overnight and the scale dropped 1.5 pounds. I'm not expecting that kind of result on a regular basis, but it was so encouraging. I went to bed feeling completely full, and all of my workouts had been low-level cardio. But the numbers were right, and my body burned off fat where it had the most to spare. I love that I can say that kind of thing here, and ya'll don't think I'm crazy!

leooftheyear wrote: »

...it wasn't until I started reading New Rules of Lifting for Women and found this group that everything start clicking for me.

I keep hearing about this book, and will definitely check it out!

Soybeaner

Hi! Long time lurker here

I run 3 days a week over lunch for exercise & for fun. I am also doing Jillian Michaels Body Revolution as I do not have much for weights at home. I have small kids, a traveling husband, & a full time job. Trips to the gym do not happen.

I want to be fit & healthy. Eat sensibly for the long term. Feel free to add me. I have logged in for almost 200 days!

heybales

nineateseven wrote: »

You guys are amazing. Thank you so much for the encouragement! Friend requests have been sent

I wrote a blog post this morning because I realized I lost an inch off my waist and hips between yesterday and today. And I ate 2187 calories. Lost an inch overnight and the scale dropped 1.5 pounds. I'm not expecting that kind of result on a regular basis, but it was so encouraging. I went to bed feeling completely full, and all of my workouts had been low-level cardio. But the numbers were right, and my body burned off fat where it had the most to spare. I love that I can say that kind of thing here, and ya'll don't think I'm crazy!

Well, I'm going to help you stay realistic too, lest you get too discouraged when things don't always go the same way.

For any big loss or gain in weight, always do the math if you think it's fat.

Change in weight x 3500 / days of the change = difference between eating and TDEE if you think it was fat.

So 1.5 lbs x 3500 / 1 day = 5250 difference.

So obviously you didn't eat 5250 calories below your daily burn, so it wasn't fat.

But when you gain that fast, you also know you didn't eat that much above daily burn for it to be fat.

What does change that fast, and in size, is water weight and volume.

Stressed body increases cortisol, which retains water, starting in belly.

You just unstressed your body likely. Or normal fluctuation.

But great realization of what is more important anyway.

nineateseven

heybales wrote: »

Stressed body increases cortisol, which retains water, starting in belly.

You just unstressed your body likely. Or normal fluctuation.

I'm sitting here laughing because I was just on my soapbox about the stress-cortisol-water retention thing to someone else the other day.

Stress release absolutely makes sense, and I'm 100% happy with that. In fact, I think I may be more happy with that than I would be with fat loss because I know how damaging persistent stress can be.

Valtishia

I am new to EM2WL but I am in love with it!! I am 5 weeks in with results that have me jumping up and down. I did not expect that at all.


Feel free to add me.