Figuring out an appropriate goal weight

cincysweetheart

I've lost 161 pounds and 40 pounds away from my goal. However, I've been significantly overweight my entire life. I'm only 36 years old and I'm already smaller than I've been in over 20 years. I don't have a reference point to go to (example: the last time I was at a healthy weight or when I looked the best or felt the best) when setting my goal weight. My only reference points are my oldest sister (who is my same height and the smallest in our family… she weighs 195). And the BMI scale. The goal weight I've chosen is 180 (I'm 5'10"). It's still considered "overweight" by BMI standards, but only by about 5-10 pounds. I chose that number for two main reasons. 1) I expect I'll probably lose a little more as I transition into maintenance. 2) I'm dealing with loose skin. I expect I'll have 10-20 pounds of loose skin by the time I get to that point.

However… at this point… I'm starting to get the well-meaning "You may want to stop. You don't want to lose too much. You'll look like a stick figure. You'll look gaunt" from my family. My personal opinion is that my family is just so used to seeing me big. That this drastic of weight loss is going to be a shock to them. But once they get used to seeing me at that weight… They'll stop seeing me as gaunt and just start seeing me as me. 180 is far from stick figure even on a 5'10" frame!

At this point… they think I'm looking great. But they get nervous when I say I want to lose 40 more pounds. I don't know what to do. If I'm right… I can handle the comments. I can deal with my family. What I don't know is… are they right? Is my goal too much?

How do you go about figuring out what a good weight is for you when you've never been there?

ScrAgnX

They are used to seeing you obese, and it will take some time to adjust to the new "image" of you. I'm essence their vote of you healthy is how they are used to seeing you.

You have to do what you feel is right, and they may have your best intentions at heart but be looking through rose colored glasses. Consider talking to a physician for their opinion maybe?

There is quite a few posts similar to this in the weight loss general, and I think another forum... but I can't remember where.

What I'm considering when I get to that point is: switching to maintenance for a few months at 50l lbs out, working on muscle building to give your body shape, then proceeding with the weight loss. That should help some with lose skin, give time to build up some muscle (not bulky necessarily, just toned) and give everyone time to adjust.

But that comes with the risk of getting a few months down the road and never getting back to losing again.

HLaR79

I think people who try and stand in your way are often scared or jealous of your success! Keep working on you. your doing awesome

For my weight loss goals I actually am working closely with my doctor and diabetes team, but in the end you only have you to please so do what feels best for you

craftscout

Even though I have a target number, my true endpoint is going to be related to how I feel, how I look, and what I can do. In the end, the number on the scale is just a way to measure your progress. You have to decide what you want to be capable of and when you are done.