Reaching out...

RebeccaMaunder

Hey everyone,

So you have all been so amazing so many time and so I am reaching out again. I basically messed up my woe around Christmas and then we were moving and the stress of that and some of the relationship issues that my dh and I are having means I have done a lot of the I don't care eating, except I do care. I am hating myself and struggling to get my feet under me again. NIcely I haven't really gained much weight, I think a total of 5 lbs, but still that is more than I can afford. My dh is not being overly supportive with my woe and we seem to be having a lot of relationship issues. Tonight we got into a fight and all I want to do is eat. So I am hoping that I am not the only one who has gone through times like this. I am wondering how you overcome it. How do you just do it? I know this needs to be for me I am just not sure how to make it happen and deal with the fights and frustrations.

Thanks guys

Christine_72

Keep your eye on the prize, don't let excuses derail you.

FIT_Goat

I used to go biking when upset. I haven't this year, and that probably has hurt my resolve at times. That or walking my dogs. I just need to get out and move to get away from it. The food just makes it worse.

macchiatto

I'm sorry things have been rough.
I have been known to comfort-eat at times. A few things that help me:
* Come up with a whole list of "comfort" options besides food. Whatever that might be for you (calling a friend, going for a walk, listening to certain music, taking a bath, etc.) When you're under stress and you're starting to turn to food out of habit, think through some of those options and try a different one.
* Come up with some "comfort" food or drinks that are LCHF-friendly so if you do go that route (or you're honestly hungry or thirsty but also stressed), it's not derailing you as much. This might be tea or low-carb hot cocoa with heavy whipping cream, a cup of hot broth, or some salty, spicy or savory snacks that are LC. For me, focusing on the things I can have helped me get past feeling deprived or the "I don't care, forget it; I'm just going to eat [insert carbage of choice here]."

LowCarbInScotland

I'm sorry to hear about the difficulties you're experiencing, it's hard to focus on taking care of yourself when there are so many negative external influences. Stress is the number one reason my weight is out of control and I've struggled to maintain a healthy woe, so I definitely understand. Though I'm pleased to say that eating LCHF has seriously diminished the battle.

When I'm dealing with an ongoing long term issue, I try to lose myself in as much routine as possible to take the thinking out of the equation. So I'll eat the same thing for breakfast and lunch every day for a while, with slight variations when I can't take the monotony. Even though it's boring, at least I don't have the added pressure of meal planning, which isn't a big deal when life is good, but can be stressful when your world is collapsing around you. Or I may just find that I can reclaim my mornings, I get up a little earlier so that I'm the only one awake and I enjoy some alone time in the kitchen preparing my breakfast and eat a little more slowly just to find some solace in that quiet time when I don't have to worry about anyone else.

I wish you all the best as you work through this unpleasant time in your life.

sault_girl

I can say, you are not the only one. When I get really stressed out or upset, my eating goes off the rails... and down a cliff and bursts into a firey inferno and lands in the bottom of the ocean.

Lately I've been trying to cope by sticking a piece of gum in my mouth and then getting my hands busy with something else... like a crochet project or colouring; those things kind of make time stop for me and clear my head a little bit.

Keeping active and getting as much fresh air and daylight helps a lot, too. I try to spend an hour a day in nature... that helps a lot.

Hang in there!

RebeccaMaunder

Thank you everyone, those are some great tips I am going to try and implement. I love eating lc. I feel so much better and not as sick or crazy sometimes I just find that there are triggers for the crap you know. You are all so awesome though. Thank you for the support once again.

ambergem1969

I'm so sorry you are having such a challenging time! I think you've gotten a lot of great tips for helping manage cravings here!

I might also suggest an appointment to see your doctor and talk about whether you can get counselling? I only suggest this because during such stressful times, it might help to get some perspective and take proactive steps to deal with the issues head on, rather than eating. So strategies to cope with the food, and some support to deal with the psychological stuff.

And keep posting here - we're here to help and support you!

KarlaYP

Wonderful advice here! Life stress leads us to the cookie jar (bread box, bakery....insert kryptonite here). Finding other way to deal with stress, besides food, is huge! Go for that walk, when you can. Read a book. Go visit a friend.

I used a psychologist a few years ago for this very reason. I allowed others to stress me in ways that led me to eat! He made one comment that stuck, "You are giving others control over your health when you run for food." This has made a difference for me! I took control of my health, and quit giving it to others, no matter how much they stress me out! It did take a little time, but has helped me! I also learned that I am deserving of self love! The same way we admire others for being such great people, we need to feel about ourselves too! We are those people we admire, and we are deserving! Again, this didn't come overnight, but has been a process! While I'm at it I want to cover negative self talk! We all do it! Our brain believes what we think (I'm so stupid, I can't do anything right.................on it goes)! Work to turn those into positives, as much as possible! Think, "Yes, I made a mistake, but so does everyone! What can I learn from it?" Or "It may not have been right this time, but I know better for next time!" instead, for example (I will send you my bill, lol! )! Hang in there!! You CAN do this!! Hugs!

RebeccaMaunder

Lol I'll be waiting for that bill. You all are so helpful and things are starting to go better. Thank you all!

WIChelle

I'm sorry your going through a rough patch. Of things are really getting to me I go walk with loud music on the treadmill and sing at the top of my lungs. Go take a nice soak in the tub with a raunchy novel and pamper yourself a bit. Your worth everything you do to take care of yourself.

KarlaYP

So glad things are better for you!

SamandaIndia

Great advice here. Comfort eating is like any habit. Helpful if you can find alternatives that you enjoy and can substitute in as replacement habits. Love @Karlottap psychologist's comment

"You are giving others control over your health when you run for food."

What a brilliant perspective. Good luck with changing habits and your relationship. Thanks for sharing too. Likely many other folk in similar situations who are appreciating words of wisdom shared here too.