Finding your "style" after losing a lot of weight
garber6th
Posts: 1,890 Member
When I started this whole process, I weighed 386 lbs. My objective when shopping was to find something that fit, and things that would match. I never even considered style, mainly just function, and lets face it, the bigger you get, the less stylish the clothes are. Granted, the plus size clothing industry is trying, but the options are still pretty limited.
When I started becoming a "normal" size, I remember telling my therapist that I was a bit overwhelmed with the amount of options I had when I went shopping for clothes. I didn't even know where to start. He asked me what my style was, and I honestly had no idea. I hadn't been a normal size for over 20 years. I am at an age where I don't want to shop where the teenagers shop, but I didn't want to look matronly either, and I also have a lot of loose skin that I like to camouflage. It can be challenging to shop!
With some trial and error over the past couple of years, I did finally find a way of dressing that I like. This past week was weird, multiple times people stopped and told me they liked my shoes, my shirts, my outfits, and some of these people were complete strangers. It was weird because I never thought I would be "that woman withe the cute outfit", you know?
I guess my whole point of posting this is just to let people know that this is another area of this whole journey where we are "finding" ourselves, learning how we want to present ourselves and how we hope to be perceived. I never really gave any of this much thought in the beginning with so many other things going on! Now I just have to stop buying clothes and shoes :-)
When I started becoming a "normal" size, I remember telling my therapist that I was a bit overwhelmed with the amount of options I had when I went shopping for clothes. I didn't even know where to start. He asked me what my style was, and I honestly had no idea. I hadn't been a normal size for over 20 years. I am at an age where I don't want to shop where the teenagers shop, but I didn't want to look matronly either, and I also have a lot of loose skin that I like to camouflage. It can be challenging to shop!
With some trial and error over the past couple of years, I did finally find a way of dressing that I like. This past week was weird, multiple times people stopped and told me they liked my shoes, my shirts, my outfits, and some of these people were complete strangers. It was weird because I never thought I would be "that woman withe the cute outfit", you know?
I guess my whole point of posting this is just to let people know that this is another area of this whole journey where we are "finding" ourselves, learning how we want to present ourselves and how we hope to be perceived. I never really gave any of this much thought in the beginning with so many other things going on! Now I just have to stop buying clothes and shoes :-)
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I know exactly what you mean. After I had my oldest nine years ago, I started wearing all black 95% of the time. A big reason for this was just practicality; as a single mom, it made getting dressed and doing laundry a hell of a lot easier. Of course, now I can be honest with myself and say that it was also about not wanting to stand out. I still don't particularly love shopping, but it is a lot less painful than it ever was in the past ten or fifteen years.
I'm still trying to find my style. I still wear a lot of black...I travel a lot for business and it is still very practical but I have injected some color too. I have really been mixing it up just because I am working with a lot of hand me downs and thrift store finds. Eclectic. My style right now is definitely eclectic.0 -
This is one area I am excited for. I have saved a few pieces of clothes I once wore, and don't have the heart to toss them., looking forward to wearing them again. One thing I've always wanted is a flat pair of boots, but my calf doesn't fit any...not the ones in my budget. I have prescription glasses, I loved the style and I hope look better on me as I lose weight, cause I don't want to wear them now. I made a Pinterest board of outfits that I thought I might like to try., or ones I think are nicely put together. I too never was able to dress for style, it was more for comfort and practical...mom of 4.0
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I'm excited for this too! At my heaviest I was a 4x but I always made sure I had great clothes. I've worked in a plus size clothing store for the last 6 years so I would always be first to purchase the best items.
But my style at heart is romantic. There are rarely romantic clothing choices in my size. I started sewing clothes 9 years ago in hopes of making the pieces that I wanted...but it turns out sewing patterns are worse than the plus size world - the bigger you are the less selection you have grrrr.
I am down to a 1x and soooo close to getting the styles that are really *me.* I can't wait to get to dress myself as the person I truly am. And I look forward to see how it changes throughout this process!0 -
GREAT discussion.
I struggle with this as well. I've been having fun being able to get younger-styled items, especially for workout clothes, but I'm also 41 years old so I'm trying to maintain that line where I get things that show off my new body while keeping them age-appropriate. That said, I've had at least two people tell me lately that I'm covering up too much, that I'm "dressing like a fat person in a skinny body" (their words, not mine).
Where's the line? I don't want to be that creepy old lady who doesn't know she shouldn't be wearing "that," especially since I actively work with a nonprofit group geared toward mostly teenage kids. Or is this just masking insecurity behind trying to be age appropriate? It's tough.0 -
This is the fun part. I always said, "I'll never wear a suit, they are too hot and uncomfortable". I was always a t-shirt and cargo shorts guy. Now I have a few suits, and most of my shirts have buttons.0
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Still losing, but loving clothes. My hospital support group just hosted a clothing sale and I got a bunch of cute jeans! I went out this weekend and wore a pair with a top I haven't fit into for about 8 years, and even then it didn't fit right. When I first pulled it out of my closet a few months ago I thought no way at 41 can I pull this off. (black tope, sequined burnout butterfly, big long sleeves that are solid under but strappy on top) My 16-year old niece told me I was crazy, I could pull it off. So I tried it on with the new jeans and OMG, I rocked it! It's definitely not an every day top, more of a going out top, and it felt great. I see pieces that I want to wear and can't wait to fit in, but have to wait and see how they fit my personality once I get there. Fun, but a little daunting, for sure!
Now, I need shoes! The one pair I had for Saturday are so old the soles are coming apart, lol! Gotta get things for the Spring/Summer! My shoe size has changed by a full size and a full width, so I'm hesitant to get anything too nice for now, but I need something more than what I have.
@cmchandler74 I totally get it, same age. It's interesting and definitely a fine line to walk. Dress so you're comfortable. What I've learned to do is get the size I think I'm in and a size smaller. I always try the smallest on first. I've been shocked, and even had to go back for a smaller size a few times. Don't show skin because someone tells you to, show skin if you're comfortable, but showing your figure is different and empowering. I hope that makes sense!0 -
I have always been a short sleeve and shorts guy when I can get away with it. Now I am much more comfortable in long sleeves and long pants. The drastic reduction in "Sweaty Fat Guy" syndrome has affected my fashion choices a lot.
It has been twenty or so years since I last played golf in long pants. Golf season starts next week and it is likely to be in the 40s. I'm pretty sure I will still wear shorts, but it will likely not be as much fun!
Still, it's golf, and that makes it good!0 -
I made a Pinterest board of outfits that I thought I might like to try., or ones I think are nicely put together. I too never was able to dress for style, it was more for comfort and practical...mom of 4.
Yes! I have a whole pinterest board of dresses that I think look cute because I have never been able to wear dresses. My thighs rub together way too much and besides, I know any dress I thought looked good on the rack would look bad on my body.
I have a feeling that when I get down to a more normal size I will be adding a lot of dresses to my style.0 -
Today the Value Village ran a 75% off jeans and casual dress pants. I picked up 2 for myself...but mainly shopped for the family. I hope others got that deal...it was only for Canadian Stores. $1-4 is what I paid today. I sure was tempted tho to pick up smaller sizes., but decided to make sure I get approved for surgery first.
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It's funny, the number on the scale or on the tape measure tells me mathematically that I am getting smaller, but it isn't until I try on new clothes that I really believe it. After I saw the first photo of myself, I got rid of the bright colors that I loved to wear and stuck to mostly black for years. The second photo is me feeling surprised to be back in a bright color and wearing white pants!
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I was mostly a t-shirt and jeans gal. While I still wear mostly jeans I'm finding I'm branching out to more then just t-shirts for tops. I still shop mostly at second hand stores since buying clothes is very expensive but I'm finding a lot more cute and interesting options at the size I'm at now (med to large depending on cut). I'm hoping some day to have calves small enough for tall boots.0
