Let It Out Room

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  • loobe1066
    loobe1066 Posts: 206 Member
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    I have come to the conclusion I am fed up with my life. I am sitting here feeling sorry for myself. The reason I am feeling sorry for myself is not due to hubby or work. It's partly due to pain in knees stopping me from doing what I want but mainly because I am a woman and my hormones are a moaning making me feel miserable and I don't like feeling this way. I have reached peri menopause and just hope it doesn't go on for years and years and years. But Murphy's law and my luck I have 5 to 10 yrs of this to look forward too. I am unable to have HRT due to previous DVT and an already increased risk of DVTs. That's it rant over
  • cjdsign
    cjdsign Posts: 202 Member
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    @loobe1066
    "I have come to the conclusion I am fed up with my life. I am sitting here feeling sorry for myself. The reason I am feeling sorry for myself is not due to hubby or work. " @loobe1066 I do think it is much due to the menopause, sadly, it has been 11 years so far and I still have the hot flashes and mood swings. I am currently reading a book called, "Life on the Rock" it is good and has wonderful "changes" that help get you & hubby through tough times. But, that being said, Yesterday, I ranted, and I ranted loud. Hubby broke some of my boxed photos (glass) and knocked over a bunch of boxes in the garage and I blue a gasket!!! Or a half dozed!!! And I was so upset that my bp was out of this world at 145/101, when I went to the dentist a few hours later. It was awful! B) Mostly due to the fact that I have this brace on my hand and a sprained acu joint and then can't to anything!!! I can't cook, clean, type...it's ouchie, do laundry, can my veggies or fruits, do any "normal" activity!!! AHHHHHH!!!! And then the back pain, neck pain and sciatica... I'm a mess and yeah, yesterday it all came to a head. I then went to cut my meat, and it slid off the plate.... not a great time of it! So dear Lou, enjoy ranting, letting it out, and don't bottle it in. I hope things work out with hubby and work and you take care of yourself. Sorry it took so long in writing back, ouchie hand is making that difficult!! Gentle hugs, CJ <3
  • rce884
    rce884 Posts: 47 Member
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    Loobe1066, i am approaching the time of peri menopause and my partner is just starting hers. it is a tough road to hoe. i have been reading about it ( as i am sure you have too) it is just part of that magic we call life. but i will be sending you hugs (not a great reassurance) but i will be thinking of you and know that you are valuable even if you cant see it right now. you have purpose and love in your life. you are worth it. worth getting up for worth striving for, worth fighting the good fight for.
    you go girl
  • cjdsign
    cjdsign Posts: 202 Member
    edited December 2016
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    OK! So here it is...
    I was due to have this great pain inhibitor implanted in 2014 in my hip. So, what are the Dr.s goals for me? Loose weight, get stronger. I start loosing weight, walking 30 mins per day, dropped 35 lbs. Then I fall, sprain the right wrist, separate my shoulder, and hit my neck into a box, revealing my sever arthritis in the whole of my neck.2015 Gain all that weight back. 2016Again in PT. & water PT. get better, then I fallnow my left wrist and elbow are sprained. Back in water PT. get better. Then I have teeth pulled,fixed and face pain... Then I have chest pain, heart tests, the angina is back, Dr says "NO PT, no walking". This is crazy.
    So then...I had a bad fall and sprained my knee, tore ligaments and a possible fracture . I am ok. God is good and no bones broke so I will just need to heal. I know that the closer I get to God, the more the devil hates it. But I will not blame God, as He did not do this to me. And He will help me heal quickly.
    I am a bit battered and bruised, nothing that won't heal. I fell when my right knee gave out and my right foot slipped off the landing step. My left knee was inside the door bent and could not take the weight. It bent to the left with my foot and the knee went to the right. I got wedged inside the door frame. I screamed for 5 mins till dad herd me and came to save me. We went to the hosp ER I just have a metal wrap.and I will go again on tues. I am requesting MRI for my knee. I have a black eye with having hit the door frame on the left of my face and bruised ribs from falling into the wall with my right back. bruises and scrapes will heal. God is good and gracious and I am His living testimony!2017 I'm looking for my new body that is stronger for all that it has been through in the past years!! God Bless you all my friends!! CJ

    UPDATE* I go to the Orthopedic Dr again the first week of Jan! Therapy for the knee and Pool PT. So for now, let the knee swelling go down...patience is a dirty word since I wanted my Christmas tree up and it is the 21st!! Breathe, let it out, Breathe, and repeat... hahaha Merry Christmas to my delightful & encouraging friends! CJ
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  • loobe1066
    loobe1066 Posts: 206 Member
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    Sorry to hear you have been in the wars again cj I hope you heal quickly. Sending positive vibes your way. Happy New Year
  • cjdsign
    cjdsign Posts: 202 Member
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    Thank You Lou! I have up and down days, company coming and want the house cleaned...but that will have to just be as well as I can do it. Thank you for the positive, it is such a comfort to know you are out there for me, my friend! Happy New Year to you and keep us updated! Hugs, CJ
  • moobaloo13
    moobaloo13 Posts: 11 Member
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    Hey guys, it's been a lonnnng time since I last posted anything or even logged in my food diary on mfp.

    I'm utterly disgusted at myself and how far I've let myself slide over the last year. I'm now the heaviest & biggest I've ever been & I'm so embarrassed and yes, ASHAMED. I am the first person to support body positivity for every other person except myself! Why?! 😞

    The last year has been really stressful - I started my own business part-time, my ASD son is difficult to motivate & live with and my brother is a manipulative, narcissistic s*** and gas managed to practically tear our family to shreds and made my parents I'll with stress. It's been A LOT. It still is. And, if I'm honest with myself, I've been comfort eating to deal with the stress of it all, plus the physical exhaustion & pain of my disabilities.

    I've got to the point where I've just thought "F*** it, I'm fat, I can't lose weight so why bother trying?" But it's affecting my physical & mental health and I need to start trying again. I'm 40 in 12 days. I don't want to start another decade of my life feeling like this. 😭

    Thanks for reading if you made it this far! Just needed to actually let it all out.