Old Self

Jerdtrmndone

10 yrs. ago I lost 110 lbs. all to gain a lot back. I now have lost 72lbs. again and now I am regaining once again. Here's what's going on. I have not worked in 4 yrs. due to having disability's.
I am now trying to work PT. a few hrs. I do ok eating thru dinner on work day;s. Then it all breaks loose and nothing is off limits. Days I am home get board with eating all the healthy foods and crave everything red lighted. I want fast foods more often were I would only have it once in a while. I use to be able to say no to anything unhealthy. Also since WW went to the smart points no way do I come close to sticking with the program but when I do I can lose. My will power has just dissolved. I hope you can give me encouragement and advice to get me back to who I want to be. My health has come a long way with lowered meds. In no Way do I want to be the person I use to be yrs. ago. Hope I this made sense.

linmueller

There's a lot i could say, but a lot of it was said in my post 'indulgences', please help'. GoaD gave lots of great advice, and much of it applies to you too. If I were you, I'd start with Murple's list.

Good luck!

myallforjcbill

I would read the indulgence thread and perhaps today's LTL thread. Smart Points took a while for me to get. But using MFP tracking it is easier to understand what dome of the consequences are to my choices.

You can do this. We have all been there

podkey

Made perfect sense to me. Not sure exactly how one gets past the problem. I see it as two obvious things at least from my perspective. First is the "all or nothing" "good and evil" idea creeping in. The second is the desire/need to enjoy tasty foods and avoid deprivation. In my case I avoided all alcohol for several weeks while learning the ropes. I gradually added back my tasty craft brews in moderation. As individuals we need to figure out how to have indulgences and not giving them up for life. For some "trigger" foods I really don't eat them often but I also don't deprive myself. What works for me, well it works for me and what works for you may be different.

I like the concept of "not giving up anything while losing that I don't want to give up the rest of my life". I love world class ice cream and gelato but alas most grocery store ones aren't "best ever". I eat small amounts of the great stuff but not often. Just one example.

crewahl

If you recall the post at the introduction to GOAD, one of the things it talked about was desiring "open, direct communication." I highlight that because you're not going to get a pat on the head and a "you'll be fine" or a "you can do it!" If that's what you want, WW has a forum called Connect That's all about affirmation. However, I'm going to do you the courtesy of assuming you want advice.

First, the reason you lost 110# is the same reason you gained it back. It's also the reason you lost 72# but are gaining again. Simply put, it's a change in your priorities. You can only lose weight when it's one of your highest priorities. When that stops being true, you stop losing or maintaining your weight.

I don't know what prompted you to regain after that first 110#. It may have been a belief that "I'm done!" because you hit a number. If that's the case, the unfortunate reality is that the things you did to lose that weight are the same things you have to do to keep it off. If you go back to the way you were eating, you'll go back to weighing what you weighed before. Hopefully, you've made that connection by now.

If you started eating "old school" again because "I deserve it", I'll offer this painful suggestion the amount you weigh at any point in time is exactly what you deserve to weigh. Eat less; you deserve to weight less. Eat more; you deserve to weigh more. Your weight is a function of your choices.

Second point? Will power and motivation aren't particularly useful. In terms of will power, I think we all have a finite amount of "no" available for a day. Spend it too fast or spend it unwisely, and it won't be there when you need it. Motivation is a fickle mistress as well; she will desert you when the going gets tough.

Which leads me to my third point - losing weight is about making rational choices that evaluate short term options against long term objectives. Eating is emotional; it's about sense and pleasure and satisfaction and taste. Losing weight means saying "do I want to eat 'this' now more than I want to weigh 'that' in the foreseeable future?" The decisions you seem to be making late in day are probably stopping with "do I want to eat this" and not getting to the "more" part.

So I don't think this has anything to do with Smart Points or will power or motivation or fast food. It's not about skills or knowledge; one way or another, you've proven that you have the skills and knowledge to lose weight. What you have to to is consider your priorities at each food decision. If you do that, you'll end up where you want.

And just to provide a bit of context, I've been down this path as well. I've lost 135# over 2.75 years, and kept it off for four years. Over the past two years I've regained 50#, and it was a reflection of a change in my priorities. I've gotten that better aligned, and I've lost about eight of the fifty pounds over the past four weeks. That's not a "good for me!" Connect sort of observation; just trying to get across that I've been through this as well.

Good luck.

Philtex

Well said Charlie! That covers it well, but let me add a quote from Wade on the old WW GOAD board: "Don't sacrifice what you want for what you want right now."

podkey

Charlie (crewahl) makes an excellent point. "Willpower" is very misunderstood. In some studies it has been demonstrated that for many of us it is more about diverting our attention elsewhere than having the power to stare the "dêvil" in the face and "just say no, no, no". Changing our environment and ready availability of some items at home is one approach of many to divert our attention. Also If we really enjoy something figure out a way of including it in our lives responsibly.
Same thing with motivation. Can't say other than habit I am particularly motivated to do this any more than I am "motivated" to brush my teeth, go to work, and so much more.
I was lucky that I followed some friends by accident into a WW meeting and joined up without any real thought.
I feel that along the way I got my "brain transplant" . I will never be "perfect" and have no desire to be.

Jimb376

"...give me encouragement and advice to get me back to who I want to be. My health has come a long way with lowered meds. In no Way do I want to be the person I use to be..."

Welcome to GoaD, it's not easy getting what we say we "want" but if you REALLY want something YOU have to work for it. We can encourage you but you have to DO IT. I lost 100# on WW then sorta coasted for a year. When they started SP program I rebooted and have lost 32 pounds since Jan. That's "only" a pound a week but at age 68 I am making a big push to get out of obese category on BMI chart and get to Onederland.

You can't do any program half way and expect it to work, you either commit or live with the results you deserve. Come here, ask questions, join in challenges, get a fitbit and keep moving. You know how easily the pounds can and WILL come back on if you do not change your Lifestyle.

minimyzeme

Hi Jerry; I think I remember you from the WW GOAD board a couple years ago (if I've got the wrong person, forgive). If I am remembering right, you were very focused on reaching 'Goal'. In my opinion, the goal of Goal is misplaced mainly because it's relatively short-term compared to 'the rest of your life' (or mine or anyone else's).

One of the things that really helped me get off to the right foot was realizing that I was going to need a way to do the weight loss / maintenance thing long after reaching Goal. In very short order, I reset my sights on the real prize: living at a lighter weight, much lighter than when I started.

There was no big hurrah or party or unicorns or rainbows when I reached Goal. It was just another day working my plan, followed by the next one, and the next, etc. I can appreciate that it's been a tough go for you but rewiring your mind about what this gig is really about might help with this attempt. Forget Goal. Work one day at a time. If you can commit for each meal (hell, even each thing you put in your mouth), you can do this. If you can't, maybe it's not your time.

GOAD has been re-energized here; stick around and be a part of it! There's lots of great support but at the end of the day, it's your decisions and your actions that will determine whether you succeed or not.

countcurt

"I hope you can give me encouragement and advice to get me back to who I want to be."

Which would be who?


Because I can't seem to figure that out. And without knowing that I can't offer any advice.

podkey

Couldn't agree more with Kim. One of the keys to my "success" is that I had NO goal in mind but to just start doing the WW way of life. I had NO clue on what my weight might be. How the héck could I possibly guess that or even care about it as such. I would have gotten a Dr's note in a heartbeat if I was at a sustainable weight. I somewhat unexpectedly sailed by what I considered my typical barrier and wasn't deprived. At this point sustainability is everything to me. Could I lose more to get toward the middle or bottom of my healthy range??? Do I want to??? Nope not in this lifetime as I see it.

beachwoman2006

Jerdtrmndone wrote: »

Days I am home get board with eating all the healthy foods and crave everything red lighted.

First, welcome back.

Second, I can tell you're a long-time WWer because you used the term "red lighted". And you can tell I'm a long-time WWer because I know what you mean LOL

WW gave up that term many years ago because they realized that making certain foods off-limits only encouraged people to binge on them.

You say you do fine on the days you work until after dinner. I'm not sure what you mean by "fine" but if you're only eating salads and grilled chicken breasts you're probably feeling like you're depriving yourself. There's nothing saying you can't eat fast food. There are plenty of healthy options at some fast food places. Even having a burger and fries at a fast food place isn't the end of the world.

Or maybe factor in that you KNOW you're going to eat after dinner, so save some points for that?

As far as the boredom on the days you're home, I'm right there with you. Boredom is a surefire way for me to reach for the box of Cheez-Its! Which is why I no longer keep the boxes of Cheez-Its in the house. Can you find something to do when you're bored other than eat?

Jerdtrmndone

Thanks for all your advice. after reading them Its what I use to do.What great reminder.
Kim You a very good memory . Yes I am the person you are thinking of Thanks
Yes I am a Lifetimer WW member just need to to get myself together about 20# to go.
Again Thanks to all it is very appreciated.

minimyzeme

Jerry, I think this is a great time to come back to GOAD. It's more active now than it's been since when you were on the WW board and if you're ready to do your part, I think you'd get a lot of good support here.

But to beat the dead horse, in my opinion it's not just about losing the 20#, it's about living your life in that new weight class from then on out. The goal posts have moved...