Binge eating disorder and low carb.....
AngInCanada
Posts: 947 Member
Ok this may get long and I apologize. This may have been better suited for the main boards but I would get eaten alive in those shark infested waters.
I've had a binge eating disorder for as long as I can remember. In middle school I used to volunteer at the cafeteria so I got free food when my "shift" was done. Hot dogs, burgers, Nanaimo bars, soup, brownies etc. I remember babysitting and eating so much I felt sick. It's embarrassing to talk about but important. I'd eat an entire 4 pack of pudding cups and hide the evidence at the bottom of the garbage can. I used to come home from school and eat 4 grilled cheese sandwiches. Then eat a regular dinner an hour later.
I went through a brief period of purging after a binge, thankfully (mortifying at the time) my husband found out about it and I promised i wouldn't do it again and I haven't.
The only time I have EVER felt in control of my eating was by going low carb. I never had the desire to binge, once i got past the initial detox I never felt hungry. Seriously the first time I felt in control of food in 20+ years.
My problem is, people don't understand. I was doing amazingly well....finally back on track. Following the Primal Blueprint carb curve at 75-109 g carbs a day. Yesterday I was emotional and caved and ate a cookie. Ok I dusted myself off and picked myself up. Weto work and a co-worker offered me a brownie. I kept saying no thank you, I'm good. "It is even gluten free! Come on try it". Nag nag nag. I ate one and it triggered something in me and I came home and binged. Ate and ate and ate until I felt sick. Woke up this morning horribly bloated with a back ache I know this was a choice I made but I just feel like no should mean no.
It's depressing to think ill have to obtain from certain foods for my entire life but the reality is looking like that's how it'll have to be.
Anyone else deal with a disordered eating past?
I've had a binge eating disorder for as long as I can remember. In middle school I used to volunteer at the cafeteria so I got free food when my "shift" was done. Hot dogs, burgers, Nanaimo bars, soup, brownies etc. I remember babysitting and eating so much I felt sick. It's embarrassing to talk about but important. I'd eat an entire 4 pack of pudding cups and hide the evidence at the bottom of the garbage can. I used to come home from school and eat 4 grilled cheese sandwiches. Then eat a regular dinner an hour later.
I went through a brief period of purging after a binge, thankfully (mortifying at the time) my husband found out about it and I promised i wouldn't do it again and I haven't.
The only time I have EVER felt in control of my eating was by going low carb. I never had the desire to binge, once i got past the initial detox I never felt hungry. Seriously the first time I felt in control of food in 20+ years.
My problem is, people don't understand. I was doing amazingly well....finally back on track. Following the Primal Blueprint carb curve at 75-109 g carbs a day. Yesterday I was emotional and caved and ate a cookie. Ok I dusted myself off and picked myself up. Weto work and a co-worker offered me a brownie. I kept saying no thank you, I'm good. "It is even gluten free! Come on try it". Nag nag nag. I ate one and it triggered something in me and I came home and binged. Ate and ate and ate until I felt sick. Woke up this morning horribly bloated with a back ache
I know this was a choice I made but I just feel like no should mean no.It's depressing to think ill have to obtain from certain foods for my entire life but the reality is looking like that's how it'll have to be.
Anyone else deal with a disordered eating past?
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Replies
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I'm so sorry that happened.
I only binged on candy.
I could control portions when it came to meals, but when I got a sweet tooth, fahgetaboutit!
I had candy hidden around the house because I didn't want anyone to know how much I was actually eating. I would find any lame excuse to need something from Walgreens if I was out just so I could feed the sugar beast. There were times that I had eaten almost an entire movie theater sized box of candy before I made the 1 mile drive back home. Driving slowly of course, so I could stuff as much in as possible before I got there.
It was sad. It makes me sad to realize how hard it was for me to fight off a sweet craving if I didn't have something here. But it was rare that I didn't have something, somewhere. If there was no candy, there was at least fruit snacks or Little Debbie cakes or something!
I understand losing control with food. I equated the way I behaved with sugar to drug addiction. Talking to my niece who is in recovery made me realize how completely trivial my "addiction" really was. I thought to myself "seriously?!? She had to detox in prison and couldn't even see her daughter or family and I can't tell myself no?!?!" I was furious with myself the way someone might be furious with an alcoholic spouse making constant excuses.
That, among other challenges I saw other people I love going through made me realize that if I couldn't get my *kitten* together with something as small as sugar binging, then I had no business trying to tell them what to do. I mean, I had to encourage my dad to just drink 2 ensure drinks a day and take 1 bite of food per meal during his chemo. That was soooooo hard for him to do. Way harder than anything I had to do to beat sugar. I couldn't tell him one more time "Dad, you HAVE to at least eat 1 bite" if I couldn't even just not eat candy.
That was all it took. Cold turkey Keto the next day. The idea of eating any candy is actually very repulsive to me now. I even threw away some sugar free candy I bought when I first got started recently because it had expired. The package was nearly full and my kids all had some too.
It's definitely a mental thing. For me, I had to kick my own *kitten*.3 -
I have not had an eating disorder, so I cannot truly understand how you feel. But I do want to say I admire you for sharing this and seeking advice and support.
My only suggestion is to come up with a strategy to use if you ever find yourself in that position again, where someone is insisting you eat something you know to be a trigger food. Maybe something along the lines of, "No thank you, and please don't ask me again," if they ask after you have already said no once.5 -
MyriiStorm wrote: »
My only suggestion is to come up with a strategy to use if you ever find yourself in that position again, where someone is insisting you eat something you know to be a trigger food. Maybe something along the lines of, "No thank you, and please don't ask me again," if they ask after you have already said no once.
This is a good idea. I know I need to stand up for myself more because I'd let a herd of elephants trample me if it meant not hurting someone's feelings. I'm a people pleaser and always have been. Always put my own needs last (which is how I ended up 75pounds overweight)
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Some people can really be cruel. I suggest that when someone tries to force food on you that you tell them that you can't eat it because it will make you sick. That's exactly what happened to you. Most people understand food-related health issues and are less likely to press the issue if they know it will make someone ill.4
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I have found that the "pushers" of things such as food, alcohol, etc most often have a problem with the substance themselves. They want to normalize their own unhealthy relationship/choices with said substance, and do so by forcing as many other people into joining them in their bad choices. Don't let someone else's crappy life choices impact your life. Stand strong in your choices, be firm, and proud, and don't be afraid to make it clear that you do not welcome the pushiness.
Good luck!!! You're doing great!10 -
Hi @AngInCanada I've never seen a mental health professional about my eating problems, and have therefore never been diagnosed, but I'm quite confident that if someone wanted to slap a label on me, Binge Eating Disorder would definitely apply. I always just considered myself a food addict.
I ate low carb (100g), low fat for 10 years to try and manage my diabetes, but was never successful at losing weight because my binges would constantly undo my efforts. It wasn't until I dropped my carbs further and upped my fats that I experienced a level of food sanity that I've never had in my life. I never imagined that I could actually enjoy going through a day without having to actively fight against those urges to shovel food in my face.
Congrats for getting back on track. I understand how hard it can be with outside influences. The only way I'm managing right now is by drawing a really hard line in the sand and thank god my husband is finally being supportive. I don't allow any trigger food in my house, otherwise it would end up in my mouth.
If I'm out and there are no low carb options, I don't eat. I'm complety unapologetic about my food choices and to be honest, I've simply learned to care more about myself than other people's feelings. I just don't care if I upset anyone. I'm very open about my weight loss and my food choices, and I admit, i get a little bitchy with people who don't respect my choices and try to tell me that one bite won't hurt. Those type of people learn very quickly to take their cake and go somewhere else to play. But I'd rather continue forward on my journey than be everyone's best friend.14 -
I grew up really poor. Fast food was a once or twice per year treat, and was used as a reward. I learned early on that when I was allowed to eat junk food I had to make the most of it. Fast forward 20 years, and I did most of my own cooking, but on Friday I would reward myself with an entire family meal from KFC, or a box of tacos, or a couple double cheeseburgers, large fry, large shake. My job was largely physical, and I hit the gym nearly every day. Didn't seem to be a problem.
Got married in my late 30's. Wife didn't like to cook, and my job was getting me home too late to cook dinner myself. Soon I was eating fast food 5-6 nights per week. Treating each meal as if it were my last, making sure I bought enough so I wouldn't be hungry afterwards. While I could eat sensibly when I cooked, I would eat fast food till I was stuffed. Now I have a problem. Didn't realize until recently that I had been binge eating.. Had gained 10 lbs per year for 10 years.
Switched my diet up, began counting calories. Worked for some days, binged on fast food at least 2-3 days per week. Took a year to drop 20 lbs.
Switched to HFLC 2-3 months ago. Have had zero binges, because I eat zero fast food (although I did go 200 calories over my goal yesterday when I made a meatsa). 20 more lbs lost.
The key for me is to understand my triggers, and avoid them. No junk food, period. No taco trucks, ever. No ice cream or sweet things of any kind. Not even the keto ones. Eating HFLC ice cream will be just as bad, since I won't stop at one portion. When coworkers tempt me with things I can't eat I politely decline, letting them know I'm on a diet and I'd really appreciate it if they kept bad things away from me. I think being open and honest with them has driven them to trying to help, rather than hurt my chances of success.
Be strong, talk to coworkers, let them know that you can never have cheat days, not even a taste. Because it's not hunger that causes you to binge, taking a snack won't really help (unless you are actually hungry). Get buy in from your friends. If they won't respect your choices, perhaps they need to examine their own motivations.7 -
Having worked in restaurants, it's no stretch to imagine off-label preparation of even the most tempting carb-bombs.....
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I don't know of I ever had any sort of eating disorder, but I do know that I've certainly exhibited disordered eating. Last night I was lying in bed and it crossed my mind (I'd forgotten about it) that my after school snack when I was 11-12 was a bowl of peanut butter with brown sugar mixed into it and rice krispies until it was crunchy. Around 15 I flirted with not eating at all but that was short-lived. I gained at university but that was due to crappy dorm food options (all high cal, low satiety so you got the biggest portion you could).
After university is when I really started bingeing. I would buy so much candy or chips or chocolate and eat it on the bus home from work. When I got married, more of the same. Nobody saw me stuffing my face except the anonymous souls on the bus. I would throw out the garbage before I got home (there's always a trash can at the bus stop). My binges were periodic. They would last for a few days or even a few weeks and then I would just stop.
Since going low carb I have found that there are a few things that can trigger a binge still. Certain types of jerky--- I will eat the entire package so I don't buy it at Costco anymore. I suspect it's because the types I would buy had more added sugar. Some types of crunchy things still trigger overeating too, but I can typically fit them into my calories so the damage is less. But fatty, carby, hyper-palatable foods were my main trigger and I don't eat those now so I would say LCHF has literally saved my life...8 -
Growing up ever since I could drive I did the same thing. Ordered 12" subway sandwich and eat the whole thing before going home for dinner. 5 arbys sandwiches in one sitting. Ordering two value meals at once so the person at the drive through would think I was bringing the other meal to someone else. Making cookie dough everyday when I got home from school and eating a full bowl.
I have always had constant thoughts about food. My ex boyfriend never got it never understood and always thought there was something wrong with me. Even when I was counting calories, on WW or whatever else I was doing I planned my life around food.
Eating Keto has been the only time I don't obsess. I can say no so much easier. I work with a girl that brings in cakes, cookies, snacks all week and I can say I they finally understand and after months of declining they stop asking, stop putting one on my desk to be polite. They finally understand that if I wanted one I would.
I appreciate your struggles and know that you are not alone!5 -
golfgirl99 wrote: »Ordering two value meals at once so the person at the drive through would think I was bringing the other meal to someone else.
I've totally done this. I also used to order two drinks whenever I grabbed a pizza or Chinese takeout, just so the cashier wouldn't make the assumption that I was eating it all myself. I do find it a lot easier to control the binges on LCHF. But, when I cheat (which usually involves a celebration or social event), look out...it's out of control. Then I wake up the next day feeling like I've been run over by a truck, which only makes it harder to climb back on the wagon. I wish I could get to the root of my binge eating. I'm told that, once you understand what's driving it emotionally, you can move past it permanently. In the meantime, LCHF is the best tool I've ever come across.
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I had a binge eating disorder for 17 years. My purge of choice was super strict restrictive diets, eating as little as I could get away with without starving... then binging once I'd lost 10-15 lbs, regaining it all, rinse, repeat.
After I turned 30 it was really out of control, and when someone had the courage to look me in the eye and tell me I needed help, I asked for help. I'm in Canada too, and I walked into a free crisis centre and told them I had an eating disorder. They hooked me up with a counsellor who did somatic experiencing therapy and she introduced me to intuitive eating. It was a complete life changer. For the first time in my life I was eating slowly and consciously, connecting my mind to my body, feeling how food made my body react (and subsequently identified a TON of food allergies that were making me sick all the time!). I was also dealing with the emotional pain at the root of the issue, and treated it through trauma therapy. As of this summer I'm happy to report I'm now 10 years binge free.
There's help out there... you just have to ask.
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this is very brave of you to post this and I am very thankful that you have.
Its something I have been very scared to mention on some other groups etc.
I have an eating disorder, or at least thats what I would term it. Similar to some above I would binge on biscuits and sweets when in the car on long drives (3 to 5hrs) and then hide all packaging. I would constantly have my hand out into the passenger seat to grab a chocolate biscuit or sweet, in a very fast pig like fashion.
When at home I would eat a whole pack of biscuits in one sitting with a cuppa tea and hide the empty packets etc.
I was so disgusted with myself but it steadily got worse and I new I was a carb junkie (I am aware its not as extreme as drugs etc) for many years and read about it, as well as tried some atkins style dieting, which helped for a short time. Then I found the LCHF, this has helped a lot to seriously curb the carb gorging.
However, I can and still do overeat on occasions. I eat a lot of fat in my diet, but satiety just doesn't exist for me.
I don't ever feel hungry, so I guess that is satiety, but I still want to eat a lot, I never feel truly satisfied. I guess this is habit eating and I need to now learn to control this.
I am so proud of controlling my carb binging, but I now need to curb the continuous eating that I do. I don't want to be continuing to go to the fridge to munch on cream cheese, almond butter, or my coconut bombs( only have coconut oil and cacao in them).
Don't let anyone force food on you, its tough, they don't have a clue about what you are going through. Tell them that you can't take any sugar or carbs for medical reasons. I have done this at a BnB (I stay away a lot due to work). It stops them immediately.
Feeling for you lots, but you can do this, this is your life and your journey, you dictate your day to day and deal with your thoughts and emotions day to day. Each decision makes you stronger.
Again many thanks for posting this. The physical action of me just replying to you is helping me
so many thanks again
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We can be very different from person to person.
Even after two years of eating <50 grams of carbs daily I still can not stop eating carbs once I start eating them especially when they are coming from processed food.
Milk no longer bothers my stomach but can cause some head and lung congestion however when I got off of Heavy Whipping Cream/coffee I find my carb cravings returning and I guess due to my lower fat intake.
Yesterday I had an ice cream (well the stuff from McD's) that comes in a cone. Then I had the second one after having two round eggs and two pieces of sausage and a black coffee. I could have eaten another 8 cones I am sure.
Like some of my friends and alcohol they have to not touch alcohol anymore or it is bad news all over again for them. It seems I am the same way especially with processed carbs and thankfully I never had a need to get carbs from alcohol or I would be a abuser of it like the males in my family tree that were not teetotalers.
I think I am going back to dairy for a while to pump up the fat that I love becauses bacon, eggs and creamy coffee was a mainstay in my health recovery for the past two years.
At 65 I do not think I will ever being in control of processed carbs as long as I toy with them.
For over a year I have maintained at 200 down from 250 while eating 2500 calories of LCFH daily without binging on processed carbs. In my case it really is the carbs at put me over the edge.
This past Wed evening in a meeting with a group of youth I stood on concrete for about 45 minutes wearing sandals because the speaker when on and on and I wanted to look supportive. The next day I was brain dead and felt like death warmed over. Went to Captain D's and ordered Wild Salmon. I forgot to replace the rice with broccoli. Feeling like crap I said screw it and ate the rice and the ROLL for the first time in two years. Then I stopped and had an ice cream cone for the first time in two years. I had four more cones since then plus two scoops of lemon ice.
I am OK as long I eat NO processed carbs it seems. They all contain sugar and chemicals that seem to do me in.
While I did shoot up 5 pounds they will be gone in a few days by leaving off all processed carbs.
In my case processed carbs are just fine as long as I do not put them in my MOUTH.
A simple but not easy solution.6 -
GaleHawkins wrote: »In my case processed carbs are just fine as long as I do not put them in my MOUTH.
A simple but not easy solution.
It's not that hard, if you can imagine every former go-to carb treat being made with Drano, cat pee, and/or skunk spray.
PS Can you handle nuts/seeds, since dairy gives you troubles, like Macadamia nuts? (mmm...)
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Yesterday I picked $60 in bulk nuts at Krogers. I can eat all kinds but cashews are my current go to nuts. I had ran out and not having them to crunch on was on thing that got me in trouble the last few days.
I got burnt out of Macadamia nuts in this heat. 3 -
When coworkers tempt me with things I can't eat I politely decline, letting them know I'm on a diet and I'd really appreciate it if they kept bad things away from me. I think being open and honest with them has driven them to trying to help, rather than hurt my chances of success.
Be strong, talk to coworkers, let them know that you can never have cheat days, not even a taste. Because it's not hunger that causes you to binge, taking a snack won't really help (unless you are actually hungry). Get buy in from your friends. If they won't respect your choices, perhaps they need to examine their own motivations.
Another benefit to being open with your coworkers about your woe and your food / diet /health goals is that in addition to them being less likely to force food on you, you have another layer of accountability.
I've been struggling with a lot of pain lately and when it flares up, it often drive me to eat / binge as a way to cope. Its the worst during the day, but I've drawn such a hard line at work about what I eat that there is no way I'd sit there and eat a sandwich, cake or crisps, even though I want to so bad right now. It would be so hard for my coworkers to take me seriously next time I refused food on the grounds of my No Carbs rule if I did that. So I'm really glad for that passive accountability situation right now as it's helped me avoid those binges.
And fortunately I'm not in a situation where I can sneak off and eat in secret, otherwise my diet might be taking a hit right now. I don't normally work in an office, I'm usually working at home, this month long in-office project came at a good time lol, if I was at home, I might be eating bread for lunch.5 -
So, wow. I put off reading all this for what, 4 days now, because I just didn't feel strong enough to read this without it triggering me. I'm so glad that I finally broke down and read it all though, because it all helps us to realize that no matter how isolating our binge/eating disorders/addictions are, WE SIMPLY AND TRULY ARE NOT ALONE IN THIS.
Sometimes that alone is so hard to grasp. Harder to accept.
I remember as a child, somewhere under age 13 or so, feeling like no matter what I ate, I was NEVER EVER full. I always wanted more, usually in massive servings, and I really never understood it. We were always broke (a single mother household with 4 children - 2 boys/2 girls), and so any truly satiating foods were few, far between, considered a luxury, fought over, etc. I often joke that I grew up eating "white trash chic" and developed no taste buds or palate. If it was salty, fatty, sweet, etc., I was game, and I wanted it all.
In my late teens, pretty much the only jobs were in fast food places...I remember working at Wendy's and just always getting massive quantities of food, justifying it because I was "working hard," "it was half price," and "I was actually saving my parents money," "didn't have to admit to anyone what I was doing," etc.
In my early twenties, I had never really learned to cook. My mom (and stepdad) refused to let us help cook, but we had to do all the cleaning. Because of this, when I moved out on my own (18), I ate out all the time. Still working at Wendy's, I ate there all the time. By that point I was management, so I generally got at least one meal a day (under $10) free... I remember going up in uniform from size 8 to 10 to 12, and even to 14, but I think that last bit was when I started working for Taco Bell.
I was 23 when I got pregnant, 24 at delivery, and only once since then have I been below my 9-months pregnant (41 weeks, I think), in labor, at the hospital weight, which was 200 pounds exactly, and so is really easy to remember. After my daughter was born, even though I breastfed her exclusively, I couldn't lose weight. I had eaten nothing but fast food junk before I was pregnant, but couldn't eat anything with meat, fat, or sugar the majority of my pregnancy due to all day sickness (morning sickness is a LIE! lol)... I lost 50 or so pounds the first 5 months, and gained it all back by then end (between months 5 and 7 I started being able to eat some junk stuff again). Well, turns out I developed gallstones during my pregnancy and had my gallbladder out when my daughter was 7 weeks old. Everything really went downhill from there. I was perpetually exhausted, and I started relying on sugar, salt, and caffeine for the pick-me-ups to survive a young baby and working, etc.
Fad diets, weight loss, weight regain, then the snowball rolling downhill, picking up speed and size. By 2009, my early 30's, I was at my heaviest recorded weight of 319 pounds. I am firmly convinced that it was about 30 pounds higher than that, just from looking at pictures. But that's the highest in my medical charts. I was miserable, separated from my now ex-husband, I'd started online college in 2006 the same day I started my current job - so I was so morbidly obese I couldn't work out without perpetual injury, I was so depressed that I ate everything in site - a month's worth of snacky groceries (which probably would have fed a family of 4-6 normally, but not for ME) would be gone in far less than a week (I began calculating which bills I could get away with not paying to buy more junk to "survive," etc.), and I was beyond exhausted, so my reliance on all the pick-me-ups had become a necessity just to stay awake at my job.
I finally woke up some time in late 2011, and realized that if I was every going to have anything worth having, be someone worthy of my daughter's respect, of my own respect, that I had to do something. I was dead tired of just being miserable and wanting to die, etc. In 2009, my daughter was living mainly with me, and so just by the nature of her being there, we started exploring things together. By the end of 2011, I was down to 300. By June of 2012, I was down to 250, as my kiddo and I had gotten involved with Girl Scouts, and I finally just got myself moving... I was still a version of skinny fat where I'd lost weight, but a lot of muscle and kept a lot of fat. I was still eating a ton of junk, but I'd finally been working on things in my head and was heading a good direction.
I bounced around off and on getting back up to 275 in 2014, then participating in a weight loss challenge at work. I did okay, but it really got in my head. I started disorder eating all over again. I'd go to the store on lunch break so I could hide all my binge foods in my purse or leave them at work, and I just simply could not get away from it. I was still falling asleep at work if I wasn't constantly eating a bunch of junk. Through a series of conversations, medical appointments, and tests, I found a wealth of un-diagnosed conditions/issues that we began treating. Several different doctors later, and some research from me on this site, lead to me being told "eat low carb." Feeling impossible, I'd rejected that idea out of hand for YEARS as impossible, etc. Having found some groups here, I had a wake up call from a friend, and I started learning SO MUCH about LC that I finally started to think I would at least give it a test drive, etc.
Fast forward, I've been low carb since 1/15/15, keto after 2/18/15, falling off the low carb wagon in late 2015, getting back on it, encountering major health issues along the way, and so many other things. I'm currently looking for a more moderate plan to fit my needs. I love feeling keto while at work, but I can't do it full time. It combined with a number of issues have lead me to know that right now, for my body, it's too taxing, too much for my body to handle. I have ZERO shame in saying this. I still binge sometimes, but getting back on the wagon is easier. After the holidays and all, it doesn't become multi-day/multi-week "benders."
In addition to treating some medication conditions, I've researched and had friends research ways to overcome these literally compulsions of when foods where in my head, I couldn't do anything else until they were eaten - or if 1 serving was good, 25 servings were better... I'm listing a few articles that I've found helpful below about the way our brains are wired (similar and related to the other things in the posts), and while I don't subscribe to any "pimped" medication, I have followed a similar protocol of amino acids lately, and I feel like a mental weight is literally being lifted for me. It's early, so I can't say whether this is helping long term, but I'm loving the freedom I'm feeling...
http://carbsyndrome.com/is-your-brain-two-quarts-low/
http://www.foodrenegade.com/how-beat-sugar-cravings-glutamine/
https://www.afpafitness.com/research-articles/alcoholism-need-vitamins-become-well-2
I also am posting the link to another group here on MFP that some folks may or may not find helpful, but has lead me to a lot of mental milestones: http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/group/726-binge-eating-support-group
Good luck to all of us, as we find our way through this mess called life!! Most of 2016 so far is shaping up to be a good year, healthwise. If only to kick the rest of life into gear now!8 -
While never diagnosed I believe I also have binge eating disorder. I have always struggled with hiding food. I could easily stop at 2 different fast food restaurants and get meals to eat while I was out of the house, then go home and eat a full meal with my family. That's just one of many examples. I've also used laxatives periodically since my teens but never consistently. I do feel so much better and more in control when eating low carb. I am hoping that making this change recently will help speed things up because I will binge less. Sadly, I gave in to 2 cookies after some sweet fruit this afternoon and now I can not stop thinking about stopping to get a couple of doughnuts on the way home. I'm going to have to call Hubby and talk to him for the whole ride home to keep myself from stopping.
I think that for me, I am just going to have to avoid trigger foods indefinitely. Best of luck to you, we're all here for one another.4 -
I just wanted to say how much I admire all of you not only for the powerful way you are addressing those challenges, but doing it transparently in the safety of this group. Your strength really comes through in your posts and it's inspiring.6
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I also have binge eating disorder, and like some others have said, its nice to know we are not alone in this struggle
I didn't have a problem as a child as food was carefully controlled by adults
but it got a lot harder after I went to uni and beyond
I have done the hiding chocolate around the house thing, comforted in the knowledge that it was there for me to run to
now living alone is not the greatest thing as there is no one to even catch me at it
I even bought proper flowery shopping bags so people wouldn't see the contents of my shopping when I walked home
I do think some of it is sugar addiction, and the beginning of turning things around for me was when I realised one day that my need for 'that biscuit', however desperate, was nothing compared to the need of the second one
I do find eating low carbs has made my battle with bingeing a bit easier, and when things are too much I am afraid i sometimes turn to other self destructive tactics, to avoid the food
food still frightens me
it is a huge trigger
and i hate it when people say - oh just have one - oh you need a treat now and again - oh don't become so obsessive dah dah dah dah
they have no idea how big and fast that slippery slope is for me
my only wish now, is that this low carb eating would give me the energy that sugar seems to
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yuggybuggy wrote: »I realised one day that my need for 'that biscuit', however desperate, was nothing compared to the need of the second one
food still frightens me
it is a huge trigger
and i hate it when people say - oh just have one - oh you need a treat now and again - oh don't become so obsessive dah dah dah dah
they have no idea how big and fast that slippery slope is for me
Thanks for your vivid and memorable insights.
Dr. Bernstein often warns diabetics that the danger of having 'that biscuit' is not the transient blip on the glucose/insulin radar, but rather the sad truth that where the human species is concerned, the first embrace of temptation is rarely the last.
It may have been Dr. Phinney who compared diet deviations to taking a step off the top of a sand dune and winding up halfway down the hill. It's not much work to stay on top once you've finally gotten there, but it takes a lot of it to trudge back up.
Good luck with the energy part. It does take several weeks of continuous ketosis to adapt to the change, and there's a reason folks are constantly searching for a better BPC formula....
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Hi all, there is no doubt that sugar addiction exists. Iv never binged as such but as Iv got older (Im 42) Im amazed at how Im never satisfied when I start to eat sugar..like eating all 4 choc bars in a pack!!
I currently reading a book that Id like to recommend its called 'The Hear and Now Habit' my favourite quote in it is 'How I live this moment is how I live my life'. Its about being mindfull in 'this' moment dont worry about the pat or the future. So for this moment I will not eat sugar
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tattoomary wrote: »I currently reading a book that Id like to recommend its called 'The Hear and Now Habit' my favourite quote in it is 'How I live this moment is how I live my life'. It's about being mindfull in 'this' moment dont worry about the pat or the future. So for this moment I will not eat sugar
That sounds like a good antidote to "future me" thinking (such as, "the future me will spend an entire day cleaning the garage").
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I don't think that enough research has been done into food addiction. There seems to be a reluctance to accept that food addiction is real. I would say that this thread alone is enough proof that it is indeed a genuine condition and people struggle. For myself I know that I am one tub of hagen Dasz away from a back slide. I could easily gain back the 90lbs that I've lost and not even know why it happened. I've never been able to pinpoint a "trigger" but it's soooo easy to slip back into comfortable old habits. If I have any hope in maintaining my loss I have to treat carbage like it's the plague. I've already noticed small slips that could turn into full on out of control eating. In some ways I think people addicted to substances such as cocaine or heroin have it easier than we do. You can live without cocaine, but everyone has to eat. It is hard to totally avoid all bad foods. They come in some very sneaky disguises where as hard drugs are easy to identify and once over the hard part of addiction withdrawal to avoid. It's not like anyone at work is going to come along and say, "hey, my wife cooked up a sweet batch of meth last night, want a hit?"8
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I think there are different issues
I certainly have or had a sugar addiction, which is forever poised to bite me
but my binge eating disorder is also in addition to this
it is emotionally based and triggered
it is NOTHING to do with liking food or wanting lots
it is not pleasurable it is bloody torture
I agree 'daylitemag' re. not being able to 'give food up'
at my mh unit they ran a 'stop smoking' group but when I asked for them to run a 'stop eating' group the psychologist just laughed and said "you cant stop eating"
my response was - EXACTLY - I CAN'T and I don't see why smokers should get help but people like me cant
I think its the hardest thing, since we HAVE to eat, we cant cut food out completely, so everyday is a challenge and everyday is a battle and everyday is scary4 -
There does seem to be research into the addiction part of it, though pot-bellied Dr. Phil hasn't written a book about it, and Dr. Oz has not yet cooked up a Food Addiction Diet to serve the masses.RECENT FINDINGS:
Recent work on food use disorders has demonstrated that the same neurobiological pathways that are implicated in drug abuse also modulate food consumption, and that the body's regulation of food intake involves a complex set of peripheral and central signaling networks. Moreover, new research indicates that rats can become addicted to certain foods, that men and women may respond differently to external food cues, and that the intrauterine environment may significantly impact a child's subsequent risk of developing obesity, diabetes, and hypercholesterolemia.
SUMMARY:
First, work presented in this review strongly supports the notion that food addiction is a real phenomenon. Second, although food and drugs of abuse act on the same central networks, food consumption is also regulated by peripheral signaling systems, which adds to the complexity of understanding how the body regulates eating, and of treating pathological eating habits. Third, neurobiological research reviewed here indicates that traditional pharmacological and behavioral interventions for other substance-use disorders may prove useful in treating obesity.
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/20495452 (2010)
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After a year or so of determined ferocious adherence to keto and significant weight loss, something changed.
Some hoped for result was not realized, some empty void not filled and for a half year or so I am at the mercy of the binge beast...fighting it daily but so far losing that battle in a big way.
I have no answers for stopping or healing this situation and I feel that I try everything I can to get a handle on it.
I also have decided to continue to keep to my keto or LC woe as best as I can every day, regardless of success or defeat. New day, clean slate. But this doesn't mean that I escape the pain, humiliation, loss of self control, embarrassment, etc. that each binge brings.
I don't understand it, maybe never will, but I know that I have this disorder and have had it for 50 of my 60 years, in one form or another at differing times of my life.
All I seem to be able to do with it is just keep on trying and hope that I can eventually put together more sane weeks than binge weeks.
And then ride that wave for as long as I can.4 -
Having worked in restaurants, it's no stretch to imagine off-label preparation of even the most tempting carb-bombs.....
Such as sugar and flour in soups and sauces?
I saw a "healthy choice" wrap in the hospital cafeteria last week. The tortilla was 29g of net carbs, but the description used the term, "low carb wrap."2 -
elize7 - that is what concerns me, too
I have been 'working on my weight' since January and have had quite a few lapses back into lots of bingeing, and many smaller binges
but I am really scared of it all totally caving
I don't want to put that weight back on, I am so sure of that
but when it gets triggered in your head it is SUCH a battle
at mh unit we are working through a book/treatment for binge eating disorder
it has several steps
the first is to log everything you eat/drink - when, where, what was happening, if it was a binge or not
after a few weeks of that - ADD a planned timetable of meals, and snacks
the idea being that when lunging for food you can hold out until then next TIME slot !!!!
cant remember the rest
oh how bad is that, will find book and write more if you or anyone is interested xx2
