Living the Lifestyle Tuesday May 9th

podkey

Everyone says it, but just how do you do it? How do you take the guidelines of the WW program and turn them into a lifestyle you can live every day...from now on? That is what we are here to explore. Each weekday, a new topic is offered up for discussion. Newbie? Join in! Veteran? Join in! Your thoughts may be just what someone else needs to hear.

Monday - Jimb376mfp (Jim) & 88olds (George)
Tuesday - Podkey (Biker Bob)
Wednesday - GadgetgirlIL (Regina)
Thursday - misterhub (Greg)
Friday - TimDumez (Tim)

Today's topic: "Shoulda,coulda,woulda" stop shoulding on ourselves.

podkey

My yoga teacher for our "older" group is always telling us to stop "shoulding" on ourselves as in "I should do this" with angst. It doesn't mean that we don't show up but there is an element of understanding of where we are today and doing for today. How do we change our minds to dropping the "shoulda"s while doing the habit trails??

Rachel0778

I think it's desire. I'm not much of a "shoulda" person but my SO sure as heck is. If I want to do something I do it, if I don't I don't do it and own up to it. He, on the other hand, will complain endlessly about not getting results but is not willing to put in the full effort and instead does the "shoulda, coulda, woulda dance". I think that right now he wants to change, but he doesn't want to change enough to truly change his habits. Once he desires the change badly enough, I think the habit changes will actually occur, but in the meantime homeostasis wins.

gadgetgirlIL

My post from earlier today vanished.

I'm a shoulda person and it causes me to often feel very overwhelmed. It affects all aspects of my life.

About the only thing I can do is to make a very short list of things that I can accomplish that day and then do them. Otherwise I get mired down by all that needs to be done and I accomplish nothing.

88olds

It's amazing how easy that idea pops in my head or comes out of my mouth.

Can be a branch of "not good enough." Worked out for 45 min, shoulda done an hour. Grilled steak & veggies for dinner, should had a salad.

Shoulda lost more this week.

If you are never going to be good enough, it's a short step to "why bother?" No way to live.

goldenfrisbee

88olds wrote: »

If you are never going to be good enough, it's a short step to "why bother?" No way to live.

That is a great statement @88olds . I'm gonna write that one down.

Jimb376mfp

Some random thoughts that came to me with this LTL.
DW is always Miss Do Ahead, always is doing what needs to be done WAY BEFORE it's due. (Sorta OCD too)
I am direct opposite, world class a Procrastinator! Do it when there is no time left. So yeah some times I say I " coulda, shoulda done it earlier"

With WL I have found a willingness and desire to NOT procrastinate on certain new habits. I prefer morning aqua aerobics classes, I have changed my routine to accommodate that. I feel pretty good about not saying I shoulda exercised. Currently trying to get my Fitbit steps up so I do say/think I shoulda walked the dog more!

minimyzeme

Shoulda, woulda, coulda are variations on self guilt trips I think. Which isn't to say I don't do my fair share of them from time to time but in my quest to apply weight loss concepts to the rest of my life, I realize it all comes down to choices (and to some extent, responsibility).

What I choose to eat, for example, is obviously a choice. As is how I spend my time. I find some value in being proactive with my choices--something relatively new for me since starting WW a few years ago.

I'm also very much systems-oriented. Most of the time, I accept that there are tradeoffs or repercussions with each choice I make. That takes some of the woulda, coulda, shoulda out of life--whether it's food, exercise or any other aspect of life.

Over the last few years, I've tried to expend less time and energy second-guessing my decisions. I've come to appreciate that my energy is definitely finite. I try not to waste too much of it balled up in knots over my choices. I'm not always successful with the strategy but it gives me something to shoot for.

podkey

Wow great comments and ideas.