QOTW:
CassieBinTC
Posts: 59 Member
QOTW: Let's talk goal this week...............Do you have a specific BIG goal in mind? If so do you break it down in to smaller goals for sanity? Have you hit any of your goals? Do you use a reward system for yourself?
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CassieBinTC wrote: »QOTW: Let's talk goal this week...............Do you have a specific BIG goal in mind? If so do you break it down in to smaller goals for sanity? Have you hit any of your goals? Do you use a reward system for yourself?
I weighed 160 lbs in 9th grade (16 years ago!) and I think I was happiest with my body at that point in time, so I would love to get back down to 160 again! It's a healthy BMI for me at 5'8, but it's also 237 lbs to lose... which can definitely be daunting, so I have set small and medium sized goals for myself along the way.
Back in 2010 I lost 101 lbs, going from 335 to 234 and I was really happy at 234/size 18 too. I felt like my body had a lot more of an hour-glass shape and because I was going to the gym so much I had a lot more energy and felt stronger too. In the back of my mind, I feel like I'm not making REAL progress until I'm back in the 230's, so that's become my "medium" goal. (Even though it's still a pretty darn big one!)
In the meantime, I'm rewarding myself for every 10 lbs I lose. I think I've posted it on our original thread before, but I'm letting myself spend $1 for every pound I lose, so I bought something worth $10 at 10 lbs, $20 at 20 lbs, and I've already picked out my $30/30 lb reward too! ha.
I have a lot of non-scale goals too though. I want to be able to do "normal" things like go into the attic without worrying the ladder won't hold my weight, go on a plane without asking for a seat-belt extender (or worrying they'll make me buy an extra ticket!), and just walk the 2 blocks from my car into work every day without getting winded. (Pathetic, I know.) I want a lab coat that fits me at work, I want to get back down to at LEAST a size 18 so that I can start shopping in regular stores again instead of topping out at 30 in the plus sized stores, I want to feel pretty at our wedding in June 2019, and I want to stop telling my fiance we can go to Disney World "next year" because I'm afraid I won't be able to ride the rides.
Ultimately, I just want to be healthier. My dad had a heart attack and died in August 2016 at the ripe old age of 56... and it will always break my heart that he was taken from us so early. I want to have kids of my own to build a relationship with like the one he had with me and my fiance is getting his vasectomy reversed TOMORROW, so we'll be trying to conceive soon, but I don't even know if I can at this size or if we do, if I'll have a healthy pregnancy and baby. I also want to be able to keep up with a toddler and I don't want to have a kid only to leave them in 20 something years... or less! I want to be able to spend as much time with them as I can.
In a way, because my main goal is to be just be a healthier me, it's almost like I successfully meet a goal every time I make a better decision like choosing salad over pizza or chores over video games.2 -
My big goals are to get down to 175 lbs and to continue a healthy diet and exercise regimen even once I get there. In my head I break this down to every ounce lost is a step in the right direction. I don't really have any other true goals - I'm just trying to be healthier and live a longer, better life.1
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It's great to see everyone's goals as it gives me ideas as well! I guess my large goal is to make it to 200 pounds but I haven't been at that weight in a long time (as I can't even remember when I was that weight) so I'm just thinking about losing but not reaching any number yet.
I guess some of my goals feel superficial and some seem super serious which is ok. Some of my serious goals are:- Improve my health and reduce risk of stroke and heart attacks since I'm genetically at a high risk for both
- Feel better when I'm being active which will help with my job as well
- Reduce my emotional attachment/challenges around food. I'm in recovery from an eating disorder so food and eating have always been a bit challenging and I'd like a healthier relationship with it.
- less anxiety with flying and being kicked off a plane
- being able to wear all the work tshirts I get. Working at a non-profit you get a lot of tshirts for various events and I always hate wearing them as they never fit as well as I'd like
- Feel confident and secure in myself to start dating again
- Actually wearing some of the clothes I've saved over the years
- Being able to mentally stick it to one of my doctors who hasn't been very nice about my weight or ability to lose weight
I don't really have a reward system but I did get some gift cards for Christmas and I'm saving them up till I drop a few sizes. Again, it was so great to read everyones goals as it seems like there are some reoccuring topics and I'm glad we can all be here to support each other!1 -
pugsrmypatronus wrote: »[*] Being able to mentally stick it to one of my doctors who hasn't been very nice about my weight or ability to lose weight
This is such a big one! Every time I get sick or something happens I DREAD going to the doctor because I feel like no matter what's wrong with me, they're just going to blame it on one thing... and maybe my weight is a contributing to factor to health issues... As a matter of fact, it probably is! But even when I've gone in for a SINUS INFECTION, I've been told I need to lose weight and eat healthier. Like, no, really? I wish doctors were interested in addressing the underlaying psychological issues that can lead to this kind of weight more than just adding to them by saying, "Exercise and eat healthier," and then sending you on your way with a judgemental look.
I was so upset that my dad didn't go to the doctor until he was literally dying, but then when it's my turn to go, I don't want to go either because of this. It's a real problem.
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Hello everyone I am starting MFP again when i started around 5 years ago I originally was almost 500 pounds, now I am Just over 300 but I have a lot of weight to lose still at least 100 pounds. My main goal this week is to stay under calories and actually work out which I have managed to do so far. I do not do rewards for reaching small goals I just set another and work towards it. I do not know what i would do for a reward I feel like it might hinder my improvement and make me lazy I need to focus on the big goal when I get to my goal of 200 I will buy new clothes. I really, really, need motivation and accountability. I am hoping by joining this group I will be able to find others who want and need friends on this long journey of weight loss/lifestyle change.
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rabidhamster87 wrote: »pugsrmypatronus wrote: »[*] Being able to mentally stick it to one of my doctors who hasn't been very nice about my weight or ability to lose weight
I was so upset that my dad didn't go to the doctor until he was literally dying, but then when it's my turn to go, I don't want to go either because of this. It's a real problem.
UGH, I've totally had the sinus thing happen too and in the moment, you just want someone to help, not lecture about something that isn't related! I think lots of people feel this way unfortunately and it can have such real consequences. I have to get an infusion every two weeks for a disease I have so I see a doctor (the one who I really want to stick it too!) pretty often but I feel so uncomfortable around her because of our past discussions that I avoid bringing up things that I need to. One of my goals for 2018 was to build a medical team around me that's supportive of my goals and my health. It's been tough finding folks who I feel comfortable with but so far, I've found a few good specialist so positive movement! Hope you can find someone who you may like better soon!
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Hi all!! I am so happy to find people that have alot of weight to lose like myself! I am 28 years old with a 5 year old daughter. I started in Sept. 2017 at 328lbs. After years of trying to lose weight on my own, never getting passed the first 10 lbs, and then gaining it all back plus more, I decided to start going to a weightless clinic. I follow a low carb diet (75g of carbs per day/25g each meal), get a B12 shot every 2 weeks, and take vitamins and an appetite suppressant.
As of this morning, I weighed in at 296! My first goal was to get under 300. My first big goal is to hit 50 lbs lost! And hopefully lose a pants size, since that still hasn't happened yet. My ultimate goal is a healthy bmi, so around 155.i definitely break it up into smaller goals so it doesnt get so overwhelming, but I don't reward myself because I'm scared it will make me feel like I can take a break. And I don't wanna risk a week off messing me up.4 -
I posted In the forums, but I wanted to post here because I have some stuff to vent and this seems like a good place to do it. My big goal is healthy BMI which is 164... when I get close, I’ll reevaluate and adjust my goal. To be honest, I’ve never been a healthy weight (unless you count toddlerhood). This whole past year has been a time of really examining beliefs I’ve always held about myself and letting go of some of the self-sabotaging thoughts that kept me stuck for so long.
Other than weight loss, my goal is to figure out how to love myself where I am, while also striving to be better. If any of you were overweight children, you know that that experience can do a lot to your self-esteem. I was told too often that I was too fat to do a lot of things and when I got old enough to know better, I couldn’t let go of those voices. By the time I got to be a teenager I was so ashamed of my weight that I pretended like it wasn’t a problem. I got really good at disappearing, too. If I hid, no one would mention my weight.
What I’ve realized in the past year is that I cannot blame myself for becoming overweight. My parents should have intervened when I was a child and taught my sister and I how to be healthy (and not the crash diets I was subjected to too many times to count). It is my fault, however, if I choose to remain the same. I do know better now, and I can succeed because of that fact.
Sorry for the long post... it helps to get some of that out to people who may understand.6 -
Hi! I posted in the other form too but was a little late to the party! For the QOTW: I have a bigger goal in mind which is to get back down to 190 which I was at years ago. While that is not where I would like to end up, at least being there would mean I got back to where I last left off with my weight loss. My husband and I would like to start a family, but being over 300 pounds really scares me, and for a healthier and easier pregnancy, I want to drop some serious pounds. I am setting smaller goals for myself that are more attainable so I don't get overwhelmed by this looming number I need to lose. As a reward, for every pound I lose, that's one dollar I can use toward buying baby stuff. I wanted my reward to directly correlate with one of the big reasons I am on this journey. At 350, this is the heaviest I have ever been and I was terrified to step on the scale to see it, but I wanted to know where I was starting so I couldn't lie to myself anymore about the seriousness of my situation. Thank you to everyone sharing their stories; knowing there are others battling alongside me is greatly comforting.2
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@CheezWhiz88
I was so excited to read your post!! I'm trying to lose weight for the same reason. We want to try for a baby soon too. I'm also almost the same weight as you (366 this morning) and I'm even using the same reward system for myself! Every 10 lbs I buy something for our future nursery/baby worth the amount of weight I've lost so far. (At 10 lbs I got a cute faceplate for the nursery light switch, at 20 lbs I bought child-proof cabinet locks, and now at 30 lbs I bought a cute wall clock that's shaped like the sun and a cloud.) It seems like we're even close to the same age if the 88 part of your username is your birth year like mine is! I think it's fate that we should be friends.1 -
@rabidhamster87
"Did we just become best friends?" (Stepbrothers quote). We definitely have similar stories! I actually was born in 81, so I am a little older than you (my soccer number used to be 88). I told my husband my reward idea and he teased me a little about being "crazy for babies," but said he thought it was a great idea, and he knows that I can't walk into any store without strolling through the infant section, so having a reward system based around my excitement for starting a family seemed like a great incentive. (Your baby items sound adorable by the way!) Hopefully we can motivate each other along-I can always use a friend 1 -
My main goal is 140 lbs - miles away.
MY Goal this year is to get to 250 LBS that will be a loss off over 68 lbs THIS year - which I think is a reasonable goal.
My goal is to be around for my 5 year old son.
Xxx1 -
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I have so many big picture goals! I want to hike without feeling the need to hurl myself off the side of the mountain, I want to be able to shop in a non-plus size clothing store, but most of all I just want to be healthy.
BUT looking at long term goals is so frustrating for me! I always read the success stories on here and think "I want that!" but when I look at where I am now and where I want to be, I kind of shut down.
So to keep myself on track, I can only look at what's in front of me. This week, I plan on cooking 2x (I NEVER cook so this is a big challenge for me). And then I plan exercise a few days ahead. As for weight, I only try to look at 10 lbs down the line. It's much better for me to think, ok, I just need to lose 3 more lbs to reach my goal, instead of thinking, ok, I just need to lose another 150.1 -
Hi all! So I started at 364(+)lb and am currently bobbing around 328-329.
At the moment my goal is 252lb. That's 18 stone (being British I was raised measuring my weight in stone rather than lb or kg!) and I haven't weighed that "little" since I was 18 years old.
It's still well into the 'morbidly obese' BMI category but it is literally the least I have weighed as an adult, and that fact gives it more realism than the 'healthy' weight I haven't seen since I was in primary school (at which point it was of course not the least bit healthy!) Also at 18 (both stone and years!) I led a pretty active life, for example when I started uni I walked minimum 4 miles a day and sometimes 12 or more just to get to lectures/classes - and this was no problem to me. Now......well I do sometimes push myself to 4 or 5 miles in a day but it's a struggle and slow going, and generally reserved for holidays!
I have decided to give myself a reward at every whole stone (1 stone is 14lb FYI). At the moment this will be things like treating myself to theatre tickets, but what I really look forward to is getting below 19 stone, as that is the weight limit for a lot of adventurous activities that I've only recently developed the confidence to picture myself doing.
Theoretically I should be able to achieve my goal this year, but it's nearly a month in and I've made zero progress so far
Admittedly there's been a lot of disruption this month including having surgery and starting a new job.....but I really need to find a way to make this work again! 2 -
Mellykay88 wrote: »Other than weight loss, my goal is to figure out how to love myself where I am, while also striving to be better. If any of you were overweight children, you know that that experience can do a lot to your self-esteem. I was told too often that I was too fat to do a lot of things and when I got old enough to know better, I couldn’t let go of those voices. By the time I got to be a teenager I was so ashamed of my weight that I pretended like it wasn’t a problem. I got really good at disappearing, too. If I hid, no one would mention my weight.
What I’ve realized in the past year is that I cannot blame myself for becoming overweight. My parents should have intervened when I was a child and taught my sister and I how to be healthy (and not the crash diets I was subjected to too many times to count). It is my fault, however, if I choose to remain the same. I do know better now, and I can succeed because of that fact.
Yup, I know about the self esteem issues! If I'd ever go, a psychologist would have a field day with me.......
I've been heavy since at least 10 years of age - right around puberty my weight really began ballooning. I was wearing 26W by high school. I lost a little weight, got back into a 24W in college, and then after graduation, my weight just skyrocketed. By 2012, I was at my all time highest weight of 382 lbs. And I had tried a variety of things off and on other time. I dread seeing my doctors. I can remember my pediatrician showing me the child growth/weight chart and showing me where my graph was compared to others and how that made me feel, and I'd get the standard "eat healthy and exercise"
I grew up in a small, rural town, and went to a small church school, so was really the ONLY fat girl in my class or the classes surrounding me; I stood out like a sore thumb in pictures. I didn't participate in sports, didn't have any close friends, and kept to myself. My parents and my siblings were also larger, but my dad's side of the family were all huge health nuts, and it didn't matter that I was a straight A student or that I had learned to play the piano, or won a drawing competition - it didn't matter what I accomplished, my grandmother would focus on the fact that I was fat and my failure to lose weight overshadowed everything.
It doesn't help that I'm a rules follower and am the sort of personality that craves approval, so my grandparents' attitude was really devastating. I'm introverted and was painfully shy back then, and the self-image I developed I know is not a healthy one. Like you, I might "know" the critical voices in my head are wrong, but emotion doesn't rely on logic at all, and I struggle with accepting myself for who I am to this day, and struggle with the idea that someone else could like me. I still don't have a lot of friends, and I'm 37 years old and have never at any point in my life been asked on a date, let alone been on one. When I was a teenager I was the butt of all the high school boys' jokes; in college, I was invisible except for when they needed homework help. As an adult, well, if you don't drink, I'm not sure where you go to meet eligible single guys. Shoot, I've only ever been flirted with once, and that was by a guy wanting to make some sales at Arbys!
When I hear all the fat jokes and harsh comments made about "fatties" in social media and on Youtube, it just makes me wither and want to pull in on myself; it definitely doesn't encourage me to reach out.
The sad part is that medically, there are reasons for why I gained weight: PCOS and under active thyroid, thyroid goiters, and thyroid cancer (the cancer is why I gained back the 90 lbs I lost in 2012). I've had some doctors give me the same judgemental look and the "eat less and exercise" mantra. I had an endocrinologist tell me I'd never lose the weight because of PCOS. On the one hand, I know that these are reasons for why its harder, not why its impossible, but on the other hand, I sure wish folks online would have some sympathy for those of us who have those issues, because yeah, I shouldn't use them as an excuse to continue in my horrible life patterns, but they do make things all the more harder to change!
And I wish I had support from my family, instead of condemnation from extended family and misunderstanding from my immediate family. I can see where the PCOS and thyroid issues coupled with lifestyles that I was raised in led to my weight gain. My parents were raised on farms and my mother cooks like a farmer's wife. But I don't live on a farm, and I don't have the active lifestyle to burn those extra calories off. But my mother disproves of the changes I'd made in my eating styles, and I think that's because she takes it as a personal affront to her style of eating. Yet she and dad and my sister desperately for the sake of their own health (they are all obese and diabetic) need to make the same changes. I'm slowly bringing mom around, a little at a time, but i really do get tired of the "Bridget's being a know-it-all again" vibe I get from my family....
So yeah, one of my long term goals is a NSV: I really need to find a better relationship with myself. I want to feel attractive as I've never, in my entire life, felt so. I don't want to be vain; I just want to not feel that I'm a pig in a dress and utterly revolting to the people around me! I'd like to be in a size 18W. I can't remember when I last wore an 18W - had to have been junior high. I want to avoid diabetes and heart disease; I want to be able to shop in the ladies department and wear pretty clothes instead of bedspreads and ugly hotel curtains. I want to take horseback riding lessons and go on hikes and fly in planes without the belt extender or having to buy an extra seat!
My ultimate weight goal is to get down to whatever I can. Pipe dream would be 160; 180 would be a dream. I know that it gets harder the more you lose and the closer you are to ideal weight. Anything under 200 would be fantastic.
right now, I take it in small increments. When I started a year ago, I was 375 lbs. My minor goals were 350, 325, 300, and then 275 lbs, and I managed to squeak in the 100 lbs loss right at the year end cut off after logging for 365 days. My next goal is 260 lbs as that's where I will drop below 40 BMI. After than, I'll shoot for 250, then 225.
I went from a size 30W to a solid 24W and in most 22W's. The last time I squeezed into a 24 was when I lost weight on 2012; the last time I could get into a 22W I can't even remember - had to have been 10th grade.
Thankfully, I have friends here on MFP who have been fantastic support, and I have a doctor who is absolutely wonderful. She never criticized my weight before, so I did feel comfortable around her from the start, but she's been one of my biggest cheerleaders as I've been losing weight; the one and only time in my life that I've looked forward to seeing my doctor!
It's a long road with lots of bumps along the way, but I keep plodding along and hopefully, I'll look up one day and realized I've reach a better place!
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bmeadows380:
You deserve all those things you wish for, no matter what size you are. Wishing you the best of luck on your continued journey- we'll be cheering you on!2 -
@bmeadows380 thank you for sharing! Your story sounds so much like mine. I also grew up in a small church school and was the fat girl in my class. I sort of learned to block out the teasing. By junior high, I’d just pretend I didn’t hear the comments. I weighed 242 lbs in the 7th grade. I joined the basketball team, and was actually starting to slim down, but my mom made me quit because she didn’t want me going to away games. After that I gained weight quickly. I was 280 by 8th grade and didn’t get on another scale until a little over a year ago.
I’m also *almost* to a size 22W which is the smallest size I’ve worn since probably the 9th grade.
I am so great full that we have this group. It’s the first time I’ve felt like I was around people who really understand how I feel.4 -
@bmeadows380 Thank you for sharing your story! That couldn't have been easy to type out, but I think you'd be surprised to learn how many of us have things in common with you! I'm an introvert too and DEFINITELY have a lot of self-esteem problems. "Pig in a dress" is exactly how I feel when I wear dresses! I wore a dress to my grandma's funeral in November and I was so busy trying to stay hidden in the pew to even properly grieve
And I totally agree with this: "When I hear all the fat jokes and harsh comments made about 'fatties' in social media and on Youtube, it just makes me wither and want to pull in on myself; it definitely doesn't encourage me to reach out."
It seems like so many people preach about how "fat acceptance" is unhealthy, but I've never EVER felt like people thought my fatness was acceptable. The only thing I've encountered is fat hate! Which just leads to self-loathing and definitely doesn't make me feel like I deserve any better or motivate me to try to be better...
But as far as dates go, you should try online dating! I had to kiss a few frogs before I met my prince, but eventually I did. My fiance and I met on OkCupid and we've been together for over 3 years now. It's worth a shot, right??3 -
@bmeadows380 big hug from here! I think we can all empathise with your story, and that's what makes this group so remarkable!
I've been on the 100+ to lose groups vefore but even there, so many people have starting weights that are less than my target weight! This group is already helping me loads just being surrounded (even virtually!) by people who understand. Start of this week I was almost ready to give up but now I'm raring to go again!
So thanks to everyone for being so supportive and for sharing your stories4 -
I started at around 375 and am now down to about 318. Goal is between 150 and 200. Not sure till I get closer. I'm 5'11" so I imagine it'll be more than 150 but not sure by how much.
Like most people here I've had a difficult relationship with my body. But I've been working on that for a long time, and I'm only now able to do this change because I figured out the other stuff first. I was lucky to start therapy in my teens and it has really helped me figure my *kitten* out.
I haven't cut it down really, but i guess the big thing is usually hitting the 200 or 100 mark. I'm big into rewards but I take pretty good care of myself so it's hard to say "I'll buy x when i hit x". So instead it is experiences, but i am pretty motivated without a typical pedicure/spa day/new outfit kind of reward. I'll be watching this thread for ideas though.2 -
Thanks to you all!
It really is so very nice to find others who understand and sympathize! You are so right - its hard to relate to the other groups where folks are simply trying to get to a certain BF% or lose 50 lbs or such. Its not that they are unkind; its just that we are in completely and totally different worlds!
@rabidhamster87rabidhamster87 wrote: »It seems like so many people preach about how "fat acceptance" is unhealthy, but I've never EVER felt like people thought my fatness was acceptable. The only thing I've encountered is fat hate! Which just leads to self-loathing and definitely doesn't make me feel like I deserve any better or motivate me to try to be better...
Oh definitely yes to this! I see it here on MFP all the time! And on Youtube and any article dealing with obesity.......The one thing that I really hate is the folks who argue that "its an unhealthy lifestyle and should not be encouraged" as their excuse to essentially tell me that I cannot be affirmed as a person or accepted as a person because I'm "obese". Whether or not they realize it, that's what I hear coming from them and it absolutely makes me feel like I don't have value, I don't have a right to be accepted, that I should be guilty, etc.
They act like its perfectly okay and socially acceptable to tell me that I"m obese and therefore can't possibly be healthy. Yet they fail to realize no one takes well to having their flaws thrown up to them and criticizing and hammering one's flaws rarely helps that person actually desire to change or in their efforts to change. constantly harping on someone to quit drinking or quit smoking, that they are killing themselves, rarely ever encourages these folks to quit; usually it just pushes the behavior into hiding. Or causes the individual to pull into themselves, especially if its something they are struggling to defeat or have been struggling with for years. OR, as in my sister's case, it just cases them to "bull up" and get angry and become even more resistant to change as a form of rebellion or "you can't tell me what to do!"
This is probably why I refuse to get too involved in social media (drives my SIL crazy that I don't have a facebook account). People use the anonymity to be so vicious, saying things that they'd never say to someone's face and making snap judgments based on stereotypes. We'll all different and have a myriad of reasons for why we are the way we are and we shouldn't be judging folks without understanding where they are coming from!
Though I do say this with an ironic smile on my face, since I am perfectly aware that being judgmental seems to be part of the human condition, and I'm guilty of it myself
I do a lot of things by myself, but its always there in the back of my mind whenever I"m out in public, whether its eating at a restaurant or buying clothes or even going to the movies. I'm always feeling like I'm a spectacle and being judged. That's my feelings, of course, and feelings often run counter to reality and I realize that most of the general public don't even pay attention that I"m there, let alone take time to judge me because of my size, but I have a hard time with not projecting my own insecurities and negative self perception on others. But then to read article comments that others make about "fatties" and the "unhealthiness" just affirms those projected feelings!rabidhamster87 wrote: »But as far as dates go, you should try online dating! I had to kiss a few frogs before I met my prince, but eventually I did. My fiance and I met on OkCupid and we've been together for over 3 years now. It's worth a shot, right??
I'm so happy that it worked out so well for you! That's wonderful and best wishes to you both!
I'm afraid I can't even find the pond with the tadpoles, let alone the frogs to even start sorting through. I think I'm sitting beside a dried up mud-puddle lol
I did try online dating once, after being pestered by my SIL for a time. I put up a profile, trying to be honest, got a few responses, but kept getting asked for a picture. Well, as soon as I finally put a picture up, all contacts dried up.
Just as well, I suppose. There really isn't someone out there for anyone, despite the old adage, and being single isn't the worst thing that could be - I have plenty of examples of the downside of relationships in my own family. I do believe that true love exists and that marriage can work and be beautiful. It's rare, but I do know of couples who still love and respect each other, even after 40 and 50 years of marriage. Of course, I know of several more who are either divorced, live in constant arguments and resentment, or are just non-communicative with each other.
Besides, as much as I hate, to, I have to admit my SIL is right - my family IS socially awkward lol I know that my likes and dislikes and interests are definitely not in step with anyone else I know personally and does come across as strange, odd, and just down-right weird, especially for a 38 year old......(we're going to totally ignore my huge LOTR memorabilia collection.......)5 -
@bmeadows380 Preach on, sister! It's so nice to see someone else saying all the things I've been thinking for so long. People tearing down fat people like they don't even deserve to exist in the name of "encouraging them to be healthy" reminds me of that quote by Frederick Douglass... "Never was there a clearer case of 'stealing the livery of the court of heaven to serve the devil in.'"
I understand about facebook too. I honestly haven't been on there since the election and I've been so much happier for it! People just get entirely too mean. It's bad enough when it's random strangers on the internet, but it's even worse when it's your uncle you've known and loved your entire life! I think facebook is like poison in more than one way.
I'm sorry that online dating didn't work out for you though I think it helped that OkCupid was so personality-based when I did it! Now everyone wants another Tinder where you just swipe left or right based purely on looks. So stupid. Looks don't last!
"I'm afraid I can't even find the pond with the tadpoles, let alone the frogs to even start sorting through. I think I'm sitting beside a dried up mud-puddle" really made me laugh! Thanks for the chuckle.
You're right though. There's nothing wrong with being single. You never have to ask someone else what they want for dinner or if they mind you going to do x thing, etc. You can just cook what you want and do what you want when you want! And if you get home from work in a foul mood, you don't have to put on a smile for anyone. You can just go be a grump by yourself! There's no one there to try your patience or constantly demand your attention. I mean, don't get me wrong. I love my fiance! But being single was really nice too in its own ways.
Although, this part "we're going to totally ignore my huge LOTR memorabilia collection....." makes me think there's 100% the right sweet, nerdy soulmate out there for you!1 -
Glad I could give you a chuckle! 1
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Hello. This is Mike. 6’5 and 410lbs. Life long food addict. I have a very addictive personality. Food is my drug of choice. It’s legal, always available, comforting and inviting. It makes me content and complete. However, I realize it’s time for a change. Not eager to start Atkins again, although I did lose 80lbs on it in 2005 but cant eat low carb forever. I want to get to a goal of 250 lbs. i actually want ppl to tell me i look sick once again. They told me that when i was down to 217 lbs on atkins. My “plan” is start this Monday, right after Superbowl 52. Go Eagles, i hate the pats. Anyway, any support on this group would be awesome1
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welcome, Mike!
The best thing about losing weight is that the key is to burn fewer calories than what you use; any variety of diets (not including the extreme fad ones that damage health) are valid to use, so if you just didn't like Atkins for a long term solution, you might try something else that allows for more carbs. Or don't go with any official diet and just count calories and see where that gets you!
I know some folks find keto or other forms of low carb diets the best for them in terms of saity and how they feel, but I love my carbs too much and the cravings would be awful for me. So I just tried for more whole, filling foods and less processed and stuck to counting calories which has worked so far.
Others find a form of intermittent fasting to be the trick for them, and I'm playing around a little with that right now as I know my weakest time is in the evening, so I've been have a very light breakfast (usually just coffee with milk) as I want as many calories available for those hours as I can.
Best of luck to you!0 -
Goals... as with everyone else, they are multiple. The biggest one is to end the pain. Everything from the toes to the hips are in various stages of extreme to low level pain all the time. My weight has led to me developing DVT - deep vein thrombosis and then thrombophlebitis, where the blood clots exploded deep in the veins and out through the skin; and this has landed me in the hospital twice. I cannot reverse the damage done to my legs, but I can end the pain in the legs and joints by losing weight. I can barely walk about the produce section of the grocery store without being in agony. So, the daily goal, using a fitbit, is to add extra steps each day, until the pain becomes more than I can take. As I am an accountant, I sit all day, so the fitbit makes me move alot more often during the day.
As this past month has gone on (and I've dropped 20 pounds), I'm noticing that the pain is, slowly, going down, making it easier to walk, which lessens the pain, which helps with the weight loss... rinse and repeat. The goals are long-term and I hope that I can get to my goal weight (only 180 more to go!) and stay there. As with 12-step groups, I'm taking this a day at a time - or a step at a time.2 -
Thought I’d get a new QOTW going!
Are you an “emotional eater”? If so, what are you doing to replace eating as a coping skill?
I look forward to your answers! I’ll be back soon to share my answer.0 -
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I am on my way to lose weight , but i am sick and tried of body shaming and people telling others how to live !!! I say do what makes you happy and me being this big hurts so I am not happy so I am fixing it , so I can be happy !!!1
