Day 1: Introduction
Carolyn1124
Posts: 14
"Today is the day i'm not going to let food control my life." That's what I say to myself every morning when I wake up. Every night my obsession with food and my desire to be thinner wins. I don't know when it got so bad or how I let myself to get to this point but it is ruining my ability to be happy with myself. I long for the day where I don't think about my next meal- as i'm finishing my first. I can't help but think how amazing it must feel to be "normal"....or as normal as anyone can be. What is it like to go out to eat or go to a party and not be AFRAID to overinduldge? I used to know. I wasn't always like this. I guess all i'm asking for right now is to get over my anxiety about food and to stop my binging problem.
Reading all of your posts has helped me feel like i'm not alone. Most people don't know about my issue or really understand it. They think that because i'm not "fat" that I don't have a problem. What they don't realize is that it's all I think about. I know how to eat healthy- I do it all day long. My problem is at night. All of the stress of the day and the calorie restricting i've done leads me to binge. Nothing is safe- peanut butter, dry cereal (usually special k), rice cakes.... all fair game. The worst part is is that it's my own fault. I see myself binging yet I continue. I know how horrible i'm going to feel the minute after I stop- yet I still reach for that jar of pb or box of cereal anyway.
Because i've gotten into a pattern of eating minimally all day and binging at night, i've totally screwed up my hunger cues. I don't eat when I'm hungry and continue eating well after I should've stopped. Today has to be the day that this stops. I'm making myself miserble. The morning after a binge is one of the worst feelings i've ever had.
I have about 10-15 lbs to lose which are a result of my binging over the last few months. I need to get into healthy ways of losing the weight rather than major calorie restriction. I know it's going to be difficult but I find hope and comfort in reading others stories & successes. I realize i'm not the only one with this issue and I know there will be setbacks but I thank you all for sharing your personal struggles with food.
Hopefully this is day 1 of many for me and for you.
Reading all of your posts has helped me feel like i'm not alone. Most people don't know about my issue or really understand it. They think that because i'm not "fat" that I don't have a problem. What they don't realize is that it's all I think about. I know how to eat healthy- I do it all day long. My problem is at night. All of the stress of the day and the calorie restricting i've done leads me to binge. Nothing is safe- peanut butter, dry cereal (usually special k), rice cakes.... all fair game. The worst part is is that it's my own fault. I see myself binging yet I continue. I know how horrible i'm going to feel the minute after I stop- yet I still reach for that jar of pb or box of cereal anyway.
Because i've gotten into a pattern of eating minimally all day and binging at night, i've totally screwed up my hunger cues. I don't eat when I'm hungry and continue eating well after I should've stopped. Today has to be the day that this stops. I'm making myself miserble. The morning after a binge is one of the worst feelings i've ever had.
I have about 10-15 lbs to lose which are a result of my binging over the last few months. I need to get into healthy ways of losing the weight rather than major calorie restriction. I know it's going to be difficult but I find hope and comfort in reading others stories & successes. I realize i'm not the only one with this issue and I know there will be setbacks but I thank you all for sharing your personal struggles with food.
Hopefully this is day 1 of many for me and for you.
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