2021: Think Positively for a Better Year!
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Thanks for the suggestions. I will look into them. I came home yesterday. Today I took a shower and washed my hair (with a lot of help from DH) and that made me feel a lot better, though it also exhausted me. My sister and niece drove down to visit and brought me some clothes that will be easy to get on and off since that’s a struggle with only one hand. They stayed with me while DH went and cleaned out the car and picked up a few things from Walmart that we needed. Now we need to get a copy of the police report and decide if we need to get an attorney to represent us through this. The orthopedic doc said at best I will likely only get back 80% function of my elbow, so there will be permanent consequences. Maryanne, what are your thoughts on getting an attorney now or waiting?0
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Thanks for the suggestions. I will look into them. I came home yesterday. Today I took a shower and washed my hair (with a lot of help from DH) and that made me feel a lot better, though it also exhausted me. My sister and niece drove down to visit and brought me some clothes that will be easy to get on and off since that’s a struggle with only one hand. They stayed with me while DH went and cleaned out the car and picked up a few things from Walmart that we needed. Now we need to get a copy of the police report and decide if we need to get an attorney to represent us through this. The orthopedic doc said at best I will likely only get back 80% function of my elbow, so there will be permanent consequences. Maryanne, what are your thoughts on getting an attorney now or waiting?
I'll think about that while I'm driving around today!
I went back and looked at May messages and found my early ones. E.g. where I told you guys I'd be typing without caps. You're doing great!
Also found one from the first couple days where DH helped me wash my hair and insisted I take off my t-shirt while he watched so we both knew I could do it (luckily I wear huge t-shirts).0 -
DH is pretty hopeless with hair. While I was in the hospital I asked him to help me brush out the tangles and help me put it in a ponytail. He proved to be completely incapable of even that simple hairstyle. Yesterday my sister put my clean hair in a tight French braid, so I’m hoping to be able to leave it that way for several days. I may just go to one of the inexpensive shops around here for a shampoo and blow dry once a week just to have some semblance of normalcy. It won’t cost that much and it will make me feel better.
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Well, we survived the cat show. Most everything came back to us (although a few things didn't - e.g. I still can't find the raffle display) and by employing all my tricks (special socks/shoes, tylenol) I don't feel too bad. It was great to see some folks after two years! We even had fairly decent sales. I'm physically really tired though.
Funny story. Our late Gordy LOVED the Mouse Factor's catnip stuffed alligator. In our house they were known as "Gordy gators". They no longer make them but we had two left. Lee bought one and I decided to buy the last one in memory of Gordy. I put it in the box of "stuff" I was taking home. I got home, set it inside the door, and heard this ruckus. Our calm, laid back Sammy who pays no attention to toys had flipped the lid, dug into the box, grabbed the gator and was playing madly.0 -
Pam - I know nada about personal injury law but I think these are the three crucial questions about any lawsuit:
How much will it cost? Of course you see all the ads about personal injury lawyers who will charge you nothing unless they win (is that true? I have no idea).
How much in the way of damages can you support/prove?
What is the probability you'll be able to collect if damages are awarded? I guess there are two potential sources of funds - insurance and personal funds. Thanks to the internet you can probably get a little feel for whether this person could afford much.
If I were you -
I'd definitely get settled first and figure out how you're going to navigate everyday life.
Then I'd meet with your insurance agent. They do this for a living. I'd want to know what the possibility is that the driver at fault might have insurance that would pay more than the cost of fixing/replacing your car. I'd want to ask whether they've seen people hire lawyers and be happy with the result. Can they name any of those lawyers? Etc.
Then if you decide to meet with lawyers I'd meet with at least two - one that has good reviews and is in the "we don't charge unless we win" category and one that charges for his/her time. You will likely get different slants from them but may get valuable information.
I would think the "we don't charge unless we win" lawyers are pretty careful about only choosing the slam dunks. So if they are interested in your case, that's probably a hint that you've got a decent case.
A good personal injury lawyer should be able to give you a feel for the answers to those three crucial questions and tell you whether you have a case worth pursuing.
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Thanks for your insights, Maryanne. We got a copy of the police report today and their were 2 witnesses who both clearly stated that I had a green light and that the other driver ran the red light. Her insurance is through State Farm. I’m inclined to wait and see how their insurance negotiates with us and/or our insurance before hiring an attorney. I’d also like to wait until I have a feel for how well my injuries are healing. I’m sure I have some time to file a suit, should it come to that. DH is all about suing for pain and suffering right now, but I think it’s premature. I won’t be driving for at least 4-6 weeks so we have some time to figure out what we will do about a new car. Mine was 11 years old but still had fewer than 85,000 miles on it. We were planning to keep it at least another 3 or 4 years and certainly didn’t want to try to buy a new one now when there is such a scarcity of them and the prices are so high, but we don’t have a choice. At least DH has 2 other vehicles, so we can easily get by until I’m able to drive again. And the other driver’s insurance should cover a rental for me for awhile, as well.0
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Pam - you definitely have time and I think you're smart to take your time.0
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It was almost 70 degrees here today. In a couple days, we're to have a sprinkling of snow. That's Maryland for you!
I was able to settle in and work today which is always a great day!0 -
Recuperating from an accident is exhausting. There are so many calls to make and return, appointments to make, things to cancel, etc. And then there are the visitors. I love to see friends, but not when I’m exhausted, looking like I was pulled through a hedge backwards, and why do they show up when I’m just settling down for a nap? Most of them do call or text first, but neighbors seem to think it’s ok just to stop by whenever they are passing by. DH is no good at setting limits with them, so I have to suck it up and try to ignore how bad I look and how messy my house is right now. Sorry for the rant — it’s been a difficult day. And it’s only early afternoon!0
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Recuperating from an accident is exhausting. There are so many calls to make and return, appointments to make, things to cancel, etc. And then there are the visitors. I love to see friends, but not when I’m exhausted, looking like I was pulled through a hedge backwards, and why do they show up when I’m just settling down for a nap? Most of them do call or text first, but neighbors seem to think it’s ok just to stop by whenever they are passing by. DH is no good at setting limits with them, so I have to suck it up and try to ignore how bad I look and how messy my house is right now. Sorry for the rant — it’s been a difficult day. And it’s only early afternoon!
Rant away! Safe space here! You need rest and you need time to figure out navigating you new (for now anyway) normal. Maybe you need a sign for the front door. LOL!0 -
We just got home from an appointment with the Occupational Therapist for the initial evaluation and assessment. She gave me some exercises for my hand as well as a better compression glove. Hopefully this will help reduce the swelling in that hand. I also have exercises to do basically all of the time to work on improving my range of motion. The pinky finger remains completely numb, so it is now buddy taped to the ring finger next to it to keep it out of trouble.
This morning I saw my retina specialist to evaluate whether there was any damage to the eye from the accident. He said it looks a little irritated but otherwise pretty good. A steroid eye drop was prescribed 4 times a day and I go back in a week. The black eye has faded to a lovely shade of yellow in most places now.
I’m tired after my busy day, lol!
Helene, we haven’t heard from you in a few days. I know you are probably busy getting settled and being available for your sister as you can. Sending good thoughts your way.0 -
The sign for the door is a good idea. Just say Pam is napping now and isn’t up to visitors. You could leave a pad, pen and a box on the porch. Ask the well wishers to write you a note which you can read when you feel a little better. This might give well meaning drop ins guidance about calling or texting before visits. Be aware that insurance companies will ask to record your statement when they call you. It might be a good idea to speak to an attorney before you let the insurance company record anything you say.0
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What an exciting day here. NOT!
The good news is that other than a little upset stomach second month of Boniva went fine.
Fed the colonies
Did my computer stuff
Ate breakfast
Went to the grocery store
Did a slew of mundane work tasks and more computer stuff
Ate lunch
Caught up on where we are on the cats from the woman's house who died
Tracked down the vet about the one we have in the adoption cage
Called the vet with credit card payments for CROM and my accounts
Called book company to find out why no payment is showing up after me giving them credit card information a week or so ago
You'd think I didn't have any actual work to do!!!
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5. "So it's a book of pictures, largely, with statements, but a book of pictures."
The former President of the United States describing his new book. Yes, really.
8. "We had some great people, and we have some great generals, but not the guys you see on television."
So, the good generals are the ones who don't go on TV? Remember that when Trump was asked in 2015 who he looked to for military advice as a candidate responded: "I watch the shows."
https://www.cnn.com/2021/12/09/politics/donald-trump-hugh-hewitt/index.html
And people would still vote for this idiot.0 -
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DH: are you going to the store tomorrow?
ME: I just went to the store (and asked you what you needed/wanted before I went)
DH: we need bread (he's changing his diet in preparation for a colonoscopy)
ME: Did you look in the bread box?
DH: um, no
Tell me again how men got to be in charge of the world???????????????????????????????0 -
We have a landscaper that does our yard work since DH had his heart attack and the cardiologist said no raking or shoveling. When Von tells DH to say hello to me, he refers to me as The Boss. I tell DH that he got my title right. LOL.0
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I just spent an hour with DH, laboriously filling out paperwork related to my accident. I swear I could have completed it myself in 10-15 minutes if I could write. He’s college-educated, but filling out this kind of paperwork completely befuddles him. I’m surprised my back molars aren’t ground down to tiny nubs by now!0
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We have a landscaper that does our yard work since DH had his heart attack and the cardiologist said no raking or shoveling. When Von tells DH to say hello to me, he refers to me as The Boss. I tell DH that he got my title right. LOL.
That's for sure!!!!!
My cardiologist says no adult over 50 should shovel snow but I can't seem to convince DH.0 -
I just spent an hour with DH, laboriously filling out paperwork related to my accident. I swear I could have completed it myself in 10-15 minutes if I could write. He’s college-educated, but filling out this kind of paperwork completely befuddles him. I’m surprised my back molars aren’t ground down to tiny nubs by now!
LOL! MEN!!! DH tends to jump the gun on things and panic. I try to resist the urge to point out the obvious most of the time.0 -
I put my boss genes to work when the raking/shoveling issue came up.I don’t sweat the small stuff but if it affects his health, I don’t let it go. I guess he can tell when I’m serious and he does it my way. I’m the same way with fireworks. We pass through states where you can legally buy them. He’ll say maybe he should buy some to take home. I ask him if he thinks my answer to his request is going to change. I have more than 45 years of saying no and so far he hasn’t bought any.0
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I put my boss genes to work when the raking/shoveling issue came up.I don’t sweat the small stuff but if it affects his health, I don’t let it go. I guess he can tell when I’m serious and he does it my way. I’m the same way with fireworks. We pass through states where you can legally buy them. He’ll say maybe he should buy some to take home. I ask him if he thinks my answer to his request is going to change. I have more than 45 years of saying no and so far he hasn’t bought any.
Every fourth of July here they bring in these mobile fireworks trailers. Set them up ahead of time and then they open up to sell well in advance of the 4th. Every holiday, not just July 4, for days in advance we are awakened by noises - fireworks or gun fire - I'm never sure which. Totally unnecessary IMHO.0 -
I point out every news story where someone has blown off fingers or worse. Fireworks are definitely best left in the hands of professionals. We were watching a professional display years ago. They were being shot off from a barge off shore and we were sitting on the beach. Something went wrong and part of the display exploded prematurely. The workers had to jump overboard into the ocean to prevent being seriously injured. That ended the show right there and a few workers sustained burns. So if that could happen to professionals, what makes average Joe think he’s qualified to set off explosives?0
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Yesterday we spent over an hour trying to fill out paperwork from our insurance company related to my accident. Afterward we both were feeling uncertain about whether we wanted to submit it because some of it related to us waiving certain rights and agreeing to some things we weren’t certain were in our best interests. At that point I decided to call a personal injury attorney and I’ve felt much better since doing that. I had an hour + long call this morning with the attorney’s assistant giving all the basic info we could and this afternoon the attorney will come to our house to meet with us. We were starting to feel pressured (by our own insurance company) to accept a settlement on our car, which we feel is too low a valuation. So we will see how it goes from here.
Tomorrow we will attend the going away party for our friends who are moving to Virginia. I’m so sad that they are leaving but I know they will love being near their daughter and grandchildren. I am getting my hair and makeup done beforehand and I am really looking forward to that. I hate looking like an unkempt mess but since I can’t do much with my hair right now, I don’t have much choice. I can apply moisturizer to my face with the left hand, but I wouldn’t dare attempt anything more than that.0 -
Pam - I'm so glad to hear you're getting some help.0
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Having your hair and makeup done is a great idea. It will lift your spirits to see your friends and to know you look good. I’m glad you called an attorney. Insurance companies are out to pay as little as possible. You may have long lasting complications from your injuries that aren’t obvious yet. A lawyer will help protect your rights and will help get medical bills not covered by insurance paid for.0
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We met with the attorney yesterday afternoon. He took a detailed account of what happened and gave several suggestions for dealing with getting the most we can for our car, which was deemed a total loss. Now DH is in a fever to start car shopping, which is stressing me out because I thought we weren’t going to have to rush that. The issue is that if we don’t get something before Christmas, we either have to rent a car at vastly inflated prices, or drive down in DH’s Jeep Wrangler, which is an extremely rough, uncomfortable ride. We are waiting to hear from our local Honda dealership to see what they have. I was also interested in a Toyota RAV4, but there are none available nearby.
The attorney also told me to start a journal detailing how I’m feeling every day, what I’m struggling with, etc. I’ve never been a journaler, so this is a challenge for me. My pinky finger is still completely numb and this morning it was significantly colder to the touch than the other fingers. Maybe it always has been and I just didn’t notice it? After wearing the compression glove a few minutes it warmed up, but it was weird to notice the difference between it and the rest of my hand.
Tonight is the party for our friends. I attempted to try on a blouse that I thought I could get over my ginormous bandage, but it didn’t work. I have a couple of other options, fortunately.0 -
I leased a RAV 4 several years ago. I thought I’d buy it when the lease was up but I discovered I didn’t like it that much. On long drives, the seats bothered my back. It was a sporty, scooped seat design. It put me in a strange posture and wasn’t very comfortable. I also had a hard time judging distances through the front windshield. I’d sometimes ride up on the curb because I couldn’t see how close I was. And I wouldn’t pull far enough into a parking lot space for the same reason. I’ve had Toyota’s for decades. If I was buying another one, it would be the Camry. I had 2 and kept both over ten years. The last one was totaled in an accident and I replaced it with a 2002 Highlander which I still have. I bought it in 2004 with 18,000 miles. I have about 170,000 miles on it now and only use it for local trips like shopping. Since we’re in FL 5 months a year, I only put about 3,000 miles a year on it. I’d consider another Highlander but they’re pricier than the Camry. A tourist ran a red light and she destroyed the Camry. The front end and engine were crunched. The air bags went off and I only got bruises on my foot and from the seatbelt. The results convinced me of the safe design of the car.0
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We spent the morning buying a Honda CR-V that should arrive by the 23rd. If it doesn’t, the dealership will give us a loaner for our trip to Houston for Christmas.
I was just about to start getting ready for my appointment to get my hair and makeup done when I got a text from my hairstylist saying she has to close her shop early due to close exposure to someone with Covid. It’s too late to scramble and find an alternative. I’m so disappointed. I really didn’t want to go to the party sans makeup and hair. I know it’s not about that, but I just hate going places looking the way I do at the moment.
I received a very apologetic note today from the woman who was driving the car that hit me. She said that she was so upset at the time that she forgot to give my husband her contact and insurance info and had to wait until she could get a copy of the police report to obtain my information. She provided her info, which we had already gotten off the police report as well. I don’t plan to respond to her letter but thought it was nice of her to make contact and provide the info.0 -
Pam - you've gotten a LOT accomplished but I'm sorry you missed out on the hair/makeup appointment! Interesting that you received a note from the other driver. Obviously she has NOT hired an attorney or they'd never have let her do that.
Helene - interesting about the RAV4. In my life so far I've had a volkswagon bug (my first car right out of college), a volkswagon rabbit, a toyota camry (which I only had a year because it had a windshield leak they couldn't seem to fix), a toyota supra (LOVED that car, had vanity plates on it), a ford explorer (LOVE 4-weel drive), and now a Toyota mini van which has been great for 150,000 miles and we couldn't do all our shows without something like that.0
