Need to pick your brain for my bf
Yanicka1
Posts: 4,564 Member
The love of my life is really out of shape and is about 40 pounds overweight. He want to take care of his health and asked me to do a program for him. He start from very far, has no muscular strength and his cardio is aweful. He has asthma, had leg braces when he was young and still has to wear orthotic shoes. Has a very low hip mobility due to his computer job and has back and neck problems ( he is a mess but I love him 
)
He is activity phobic too lol. So it make my job quite complicated. I try to make thing as easy as I can for him. I feel he need something short and doable.
I was thinking of a 15 minutes HIIT cardio session ( will start with walking)
Then some progressive body weight exercise like plank and push-ups with increased incline as his strength increase. For his legs I was thinking of squatting on a seat until he has better hips mobility.
Good plan?
)He is activity phobic too lol. So it make my job quite complicated. I try to make thing as easy as I can for him. I feel he need something short and doable.
I was thinking of a 15 minutes HIIT cardio session ( will start with walking)
Then some progressive body weight exercise like plank and push-ups with increased incline as his strength increase. For his legs I was thinking of squatting on a seat until he has better hips mobility.
Good plan?
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Replies
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The love of my life is really out of shape and is about 40 pounds overweight. He want to take care of his health and asked me to do a program for him. He start from very far, has no muscular strength and his cardio is aweful. He has asthma, had leg braces when he was young and still has to wear orthotic shoes. Has a very low hip mobility due to his computer job and has back and neck problems ( he is a mess but I love him)
He is activity phobic too lol. So it make my job quite complicated. I try to make thing as easy as I can for him. I feel he need something short and doable.
I was thinking of a 15 minutes HIIT cardio session ( will start with walking)
Then some progressive body weight exercise like plank and push-ups with increased incline as his strength increase. For his legs I was thinking of squatting on a seat until he has better hips mobility.
Good plan?
I would start by finding out whether or not he has any training preferences in terms of modality.0 -
Just break up....
....sorry, could not resist0 -
The love of my life is really out of shape and is about 40 pounds overweight. He want to take care of his health and asked me to do a program for him. He start from very far, has no muscular strength and his cardio is aweful. He has asthma, had leg braces when he was young and still has to wear orthotic shoes. Has a very low hip mobility due to his computer job and has back and neck problems ( he is a mess but I love him)
He is activity phobic too lol. So it make my job quite complicated. I try to make thing as easy as I can for him. I feel he need something short and doable.
I was thinking of a 15 minutes HIIT cardio session ( will start with walking)
Then some progressive body weight exercise like plank and push-ups with increased incline as his strength increase. For his legs I was thinking of squatting on a seat until he has better hips mobility.
Good plan?
I would start by finding out whether or not he has any training preferences in terms of modality.
He does not want to go to the gym yet so it has to be in home, fast, doable and efficient.0 -
Just break up....
....sorry, could not resist
Lol I'd rather not 0 -
Looking at this logically, I think you need to keep a few things in mind:
1) Find activities that are least objectionable or possibly enjoyable and in order to do this there may need to be a combination of discussion and possibly trial and error.
2) Some form of resistance training would be a good idea so perhaps some form of low volume bodyweight training to start with, and I say low volume because a) If he dislikes it it's not an intense/high volume program and b) Since he is very new to training he doesn't require much volume anyways.
Your overall and underlying goal should be to get him moving more, with bonus points to you if you can find a way to make resistance training enjoyable to him. Accomplish this through keeping adherence as high as you can.
I wouldn't do HIIT with him at this point.0 -
Looking at this logically, I think you need to keep a few things in mind:
1) Find activities that are least objectionable or possibly enjoyable and in order to do this there may need to be a combination of discussion and possibly trial and error.
2) Some form of resistance training would be a good idea so perhaps some form of low volume bodyweight training to start with, and I say low volume because a) If he dislikes it it's not an intense/high volume program and b) Since he is very new to training he doesn't require much volume anyways.
Your overall and underlying goal should be to get him moving more, with bonus points to you if you can find a way to make resistance training enjoyable to him. Accomplish this through keeping adherence as high as you can.
I wouldn't do HIIT with him at this point.
Thank you for your answer. It is totally a trial and error process. When I am saying HIIT, I am not talking about running but walking. He can't walk for long periods without being in pain so I need to get as much effective cardio for a shorter time. I was thinking like walking faster for 30 seconds then slower for 90 seconds. Maybe I should just make him walk faster for 15 minutes and go Jillian Micheals on his *kitten*0 -
Looking at this logically, I think you need to keep a few things in mind:
1) Find activities that are least objectionable or possibly enjoyable and in order to do this there may need to be a combination of discussion and possibly trial and error.
2) Some form of resistance training would be a good idea so perhaps some form of low volume bodyweight training to start with, and I say low volume because a) If he dislikes it it's not an intense/high volume program and b) Since he is very new to training he doesn't require much volume anyways.
Your overall and underlying goal should be to get him moving more, with bonus points to you if you can find a way to make resistance training enjoyable to him. Accomplish this through keeping adherence as high as you can.
I wouldn't do HIIT with him at this point.
Thank you for your answer. It is totally a trial and error process. When I am saying HIIT, I am not talking about running but walking. He can't walk for long periods without being in pain so I need to get as much effective cardio for a shorter time. I was thinking like walking faster for 30 seconds then slower for 90 seconds. Maybe I should just make him walk faster for 15 minutes and go Jillian Micheals on his *kitten*
I'm not convinced that doing intervals at low intensity will provide any advantages. At least I'm not aware of it, as you'd really be referring to low intensity interval training, since the "sprint" portion of this would consist of fast walking.
I'm certainly open to being convinced otherwise --- I'm not terribly educated on cardio, I'm just thinking about the above and giving an opinion at this point.0 -
I'd just have him work building up his time walking and then add other body weight exercises such as pushups and pullups, dips etc. Ease him into it and keep at it until it becomes a habit.0
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Looking at this logically, I think you need to keep a few things in mind:
1) Find activities that are least objectionable or possibly enjoyable and in order to do this there may need to be a combination of discussion and possibly trial and error.
2) Some form of resistance training would be a good idea so perhaps some form of low volume bodyweight training to start with, and I say low volume because a) If he dislikes it it's not an intense/high volume program and b) Since he is very new to training he doesn't require much volume anyways.
Your overall and underlying goal should be to get him moving more, with bonus points to you if you can find a way to make resistance training enjoyable to him. Accomplish this through keeping adherence as high as you can.
I wouldn't do HIIT with him at this point.
Thank you for your answer. It is totally a trial and error process. When I am saying HIIT, I am not talking about running but walking. He can't walk for long periods without being in pain so I need to get as much effective cardio for a shorter time. I was thinking like walking faster for 30 seconds then slower for 90 seconds. Maybe I should just make him walk faster for 15 minutes and go Jillian Micheals on his *kitten*
How about swimming? Do you have access to an elliptical?
And does it really have to be cardio? You can still build up endurance doing strength/resistance training. Like what with Phillibis said - maybe have him do body weight exercises. Maybe include yoga to help him loosen up afterwards because of his mobility issues.0 -
I always guess that people haven't been exercising because they haven't found something they like. Your SO has not been exercising.
You GOT to find something he likes. Bowling, badminton, roller hockey, skateboarding, whatever.
Once a person establishes the habit of being active, then they learn to like being active and you can build from there.
The last thing I would want to do, if I was out of shape so it was hard, was some kind of regimented routine. But, if I was having fun . . .0 -
Looking at this logically, I think you need to keep a few things in mind:
1) Find activities that are least objectionable or possibly enjoyable and in order to do this there may need to be a combination of discussion and possibly trial and error.
2) Some form of resistance training would be a good idea so perhaps some form of low volume bodyweight training to start with, and I say low volume because a) If he dislikes it it's not an intense/high volume program and b) Since he is very new to training he doesn't require much volume anyways.
Your overall and underlying goal should be to get him moving more, with bonus points to you if you can find a way to make resistance training enjoyable to him. Accomplish this through keeping adherence as high as you can.
I wouldn't do HIIT with him at this point.
Thank you for your answer. It is totally a trial and error process. When I am saying HIIT, I am not talking about running but walking. He can't walk for long periods without being in pain so I need to get as much effective cardio for a shorter time. I was thinking like walking faster for 30 seconds then slower for 90 seconds. Maybe I should just make him walk faster for 15 minutes and go Jillian Micheals on his *kitten*
How about swimming? Do you have access to an elliptical?
And does it really have to be cardio? You can still build up endurance doing strength/resistance training. Like what with Phillibis said - maybe have him do body weight exercises. Maybe include yoga to help him loosen up afterwards because of his mobility issues.
I agree with Joy- that sounds like a good plan.
If you really want to do cardio with him, you two can just take a nightly stroll around your neighborhood or something.0 -
My husband has bad knees and 100 pounds to lose. His jobs have always been computer related as well. (Except when he was a cross-country trucker. That job sucks for trying to be healthy, too.)
From experience - You have to help him discover something he can enjoy doing. We started out walking, and my husband could go about 7 minutes before he needed a break. Two months later, he's up to a brisk 30 minutes without a break! We also bought a Gazelle Supreme, and we both love that thing!
Something to keep in mind - HE has to WANT to do it.. whatever "it" is. It's his body, and unfortunately you can't just pick it up for him and make him exercise. HE has to have the motivation to be healthier.
Good luck!0 -
I do not want to sound like I am the whiny girlfriend that want him to exercise. It is just that he had a dx of fatty liver and he turned 40 so he asked me to help him. I totally agree that he has to find something that he like but he does not want to go to the gym yet, or go swimming or take more than 30 minutes or........well you see my point.0
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I do not want to sound like I am the whiny girlfriend that want him to exercise. It is just that he had a dx of fatty liver and he turned 40 so he asked me to help him. I totally agree that he has to find something that he like but he does not want to go to the gym yet, or go swimming or take more than 30 minutes or........well you see my point.
Then he is saying it for your benefit, he has to want it. I know my hubby and I went through this but it was me that was not ready, hubby has gone regularly to the gym for years, eats what he wants and stays slim and trim. I got fat again. I work with computers and most of my non work activities had gotten to be computer related as well. Then I woke up and now I use the app for on the go and I spend a good deal of time on this website, inbetween doing Zumba, step aerobics, hand weights, bebooping around the house. I had to be ready for it.
He couldn't get me to do it. Oh I said I wanted to lose weight repeatedly for a couple of years. But it didn't happen till July of this year, I'm down almost 20lbs. Because I was finally ready.0 -
I do not want to sound like I am the whiny girlfriend that want him to exercise. It is just that he had a dx of fatty liver and he turned 40 so he asked me to help him. I totally agree that he has to find something that he like but he does not want to go to the gym yet, or go swimming or take more than 30 minutes or........well you see my point.
Even if you push him he's not going to lose the weight until he decides to do it. I was the same way. I was overweight and couldn't exercise because I was too busy with work, life, etc. Believe it or not, what got me motivated was a Julian Michaels infommercial. I was up early on a Saturday morning watching TV, probably eating a bag of Cheetos. This infommercial came on for one of her DVDs. I didn't buy the DVD but she said something like, being fat is a choice as much as being healthy is. I'm paraphrasing but that's how I heard it. I decided not to be fat right then and there. I'm not sure why it clicked this time but it did.
He needs to have one of those moments or an epiphany to kick his *kitten* into making a change. Try watching Biggest Loser or something like that. I don't agree with the methods they use but when you see 300lb+ people running and doing lifting weights, you have to think, if they can do it, why can't I?
You can encourage him but I agree if you nag him he's just going to resent you and not exercise anyway.0 -
I don't nag him. He asked me for a program and I am making him a program that work with his limitation because he asked me to. I believe in him and maybe one day he will believe in himself too. I don't see myself telling him, come back to me when you are committed...... I am no judge of that.0
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It sounds a lot to me like he is making excuses. All of these limitations is him just phoning it in to placate you. He is telling you what he thinks you want to hear.
He lacks motivation. Thats what he needs more than a program. He needs a reason to get off his *kitten* and move.
There is nothing in the entire world that motivates a man more than a woman. Countries go to war over a woman (Helen of Troy).
You have the tools you need to motivate him. Use them to your advantage and dont be nice about it. Its his health... fight for it and fight dirty if you have to.
Just remember when it comes to utilizing your lady goods... positive reinforcement gets you much further than negative.
Yeah - I know it sounds like im kidding... and I half am. But not really.0 -
The problem is, this is what YOU think.
He needs to do it for himself without being nagged.0 -
For lower impact and relatively short workouts, have a look at the You Are Your Own Gym stuff, especially the app for the smartphones. The easiest workout starts with pushups against a chair and chair dips etc. It's only about $2 or $3 bucks, so even if he just looks at it and then decides not to do it, it's not a giant outlay.
If that perks his interest but some of the exercises are still beyond him, perhaps look at the book or online for easier variations.0 -
The problem is, this is what YOU think.
He needs to do it for himself without being nagged.
Holy **** I am not nagging!!!!!! What should I say to him.....tough **** you are one your own buddy?0 -
The problem is, this is what YOU think.
He needs to do it for himself without being nagged.
Holy **** I am not nagging!!!!!! What should I say to him.....tough **** you are one your own buddy?
That might be what he needs to hear to get him motivated.0 -
He asked her for a program - she isn't foisting one on him that he doesn't want.
Could you two do it together? I think it could be fun to do a walking/resistance circuit. You can go for a walk but stop at intervals to do body weight squats, yoga stretches, planks, modified push ups. It could be short and sweet and changing it up would make the whole thing go by really fast.0 -
The love of my life is really out of shape and is about 40 pounds overweight. He want to take care of his health and asked me to do a program for him. He start from very far, has no muscular strength and his cardio is aweful. He has asthma, had leg braces when he was young and still has to wear orthotic shoes. Has a very low hip mobility due to his computer job and has back and neck problems ( he is a mess but I love him)
He is activity phobic too lol. So it make my job quite complicated. I try to make thing as easy as I can for him. I feel he need something short and doable.
I was thinking of a 15 minutes HIIT cardio session ( will start with walking)
Then some progressive body weight exercise like plank and push-ups with increased incline as his strength increase. For his legs I was thinking of squatting on a seat until he has better hips mobility.
Good plan?
I would start by finding out whether or not he has any training preferences in terms of modality.
He does not want to go to the gym yet so it has to be in home, fast, doable and efficient.
I spend about 30 minutes in the gym 3 days a week. I can outlift most people who go to the gym. Even pound for pound I still do more EVEN WITH A BAD BACK(Degenerative disc disease). My back pain goes away from the gym,
his hips will become more flexible.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qX9FSZJu448
I am sure he is in better shape than this guy, I am not saying to do yoga(i am not saying to not do it either). But there is no true reason he shouldnt.0 -
I always guess that people haven't been exercising because they haven't found something they like. Your SO has not been exercising.
You GOT to find something he likes. Bowling, badminton, roller hockey, skateboarding, whatever.
Once a person establishes the habit of being active, then they learn to like being active and you can build from there.
The last thing I would want to do, if I was out of shape so it was hard, was some kind of regimented routine. But, if I was having fun . . .
Totally this. Find something he enjoys and is active.0 -
HE asked YOU for a program, but you need to come to terms with the fact that you cannot do this for him. It's up to him. Look at how much you have already invested into this, thinking about it, asking friends on MFP, etc. I'd recommend you hand him a 30 Day Shred DVD and say "This program is as good as you put into it. If you really want this, you'll commit to the 30 days." And then, IF he does it, first of all he WILL see results and second of all you'll know if HE is as committed to himself as you are to him and THEN you can make a real plan for him.
my .020
