100lbs gone and yet feeling I can't do it anymore....

ALC32JB

Hi folks! I have never posted on here before but am looking for ANYTHING that could help me. I lost over 100lbs and have kept it off for about 3 years... I have been losing and gaining the same 15 friggin lbs now since then and canNOT seem to get the next 60 off. Even though low carb has been the only thing that has EVER worked for and makes me feel so good when I eat that way... I seem to be looking for other things (i.e.tried carb-cycling) that might get me back on track (no luck). This weekend I just let it all fly and ate like I used to. We are talking fast food, pizza, fries, muffins... I feel disgusting and like I have gained 10 lbs.
I feel trapped. I have days where I just want to be able to eat whole wheat toast and a banana and not feel like I have done something wrong! I don't know why I can't seem to get back on track and I am frustrated beyond. I make it about 5 days of doing great again and then seem to find myself into the carbs (and not necessarily bad ones - fruit and whole wheat bread) but still, I am not getting rid of my cravings. And I hate hearing "well, there should never be anything wrong with you having fruit" from people who just don't understand. So basically, I am frustrated and thought someone might just have some words of wisdom because I feel like a failure and that I can't do it anymore and am so scared of gaining the weight back (let alone losing the rest of it) and I just want to curl up with some bacon and cry! Help!

kiramaniac

Can you provide some info?


What is your age, gender, and height?
What approach did you take for losing the 100 lbs?
How long did it take?
What are your current macros?
What is your current calorie target? Do you typically eat under, over or at your calorie target?
What is your current weight and lean body mass?
How much are you exercising per week? What type of exercise?

I swear - there's a method to these questions!

Separately, I'll say that you seem to be looking at low carb as a short term diet, and not a long term lifestyle. "I want to be able to eat whole wheat toast and a banana and not feel like I've done something wrong". Hon - the reality is, that you might never be able to do that. We have issues with carbs and sugars. As much as you want to see whole wheat toast as not being a "bad carb", carbs are carbs - they impact our bodies in the same way. They spike our blood sugar, and insulin, and cause cravings. It sucks. And that's way most people end up putting the weight back on - because they think they can go back to eating their old way once they hit a goal (which is what made us fat in the first place.

I strongly recommend that you stop carb cycling. It really sounds like it's causing major triggers for you. It doesn't sound like that's working.

Get back on the low carb wagon. To refocus your mind, watch Fat Head if you have a chance. If you haven't read "Why We Get Fat" by Taubes, do that too. You really need to believe in this as a long term lifestyle to stay committed. Mark Sisson's "Primal Blueprint" is another good option.

Another suggestion is to take a break for a few weeks eating at your maintenance calories - don't eat at a deficit. But focus strongly on high fat, moderate protein, low carbs (something like 70-25-5 for macros).

And finally - don't stress that 10 pounds. It's water weight. Most of it is going to come right back off.

You can do this.

Jasmine_James

My advice: Do curl up with some bacon and cry!

I have a lot of the same struggles. I've been doing low carb/keto with scheduled breaks about every 4-6 weeks throughout this year. The breaks are usually tied to social events like weddings and vacations, but also I feel like I do best when I go hard core keto for 3-4 weeks and then take a week off. Once I open the door to carbs, I tend to go way, way overboard. More recently I tried experimenting with refeeds every 10 days, but really never successfully was able to limit those to just one meal or even just one day.

Personally, I need to go all in with low carb in order to get rid of the cravings and really recommit. I think for some of us (and probably due to the reasons that Kira outlined above), it's gotta be all or nothing -- at least for a time. If you're having any carbs, it's just going to lead to more and more and it will continue to be really difficult to get back to low carb eating when you're in the midst of that cycle.

I also struggle with the external pressures. It does take some mental power to continuously be at restaurants, parties, etc. where everyone is eating carbs and I have to focus on finding the most keto-friendly alternatives.

But, it's also a struggle being overweight and feeling self-conscious and tired all the time and uncomfortable in clothes.

So what I'm saying is yes, it's hard; it's a fight; it takes a lot of effort and it's lonely at the top at times -- but all of that is even harder with an extra 100 lbs...

I think you CAN do it. You have done it -- my goodness, you lost 100 lbs and you've kept if off for 3 years! You *know* what to do. You got this. You just need to get back in touch with the part of you that got this far.

I'm no expert and I don't know you, so I'm not going to try to tell you what you should do, but this is what I would do in your shoes:

Carve out 1-3 days to focus on you. Make yourself a priority. Cancel any social obligations or partner caretaking. Do things that you love to do and feel nurturing to you (read a book you love, watch some girly movies, do some crafts or writing -- whatever it is). Spend time preparing for this 1-3 day stretch by researching some low carb recipes that sound great to you. Stock up your fridge and for 1-3 days just eat all the low-carb foods you love the most and take care of yourself. Do some exercises that you like to reawaken the muscles. Take some long baths and relax. After a few days of eating wonderful low carb foods and getting all the carbs away from you, the cravings will likely go away.

I've done a fat fast twice now as a reset button. My thoughts stop spiraling out of control, my cravings go away, and I feel so much healthier and nurtured. This lifestyle isn't just about weight -- I truly believe the carbs have an impact on my dopamine and seratonin levels, so the more carbs I eat the more depressed and anxious I feel and the more negative my thoughts become. Once I've managed to have a few awesome low carb days with good exercise, then I'm back in a healthy head space and low carb feels good and natural again.

ALC32JB

Thanks for the lovely replies! I appreciate it!

To answer some of the questions: I am a 6ft, 32 year old female with a large frame. I read the south beach diet and things really clicked for me with that, so that was the basic principal I followed to lose the weight. (I had tried EVERYTHING before that and nothing ever worked for me). I find I lose in chunks, so I would lose nothing for a couple months and then whammo!... the scale would drop 10. I lost the weight over approx 2 years. I have the calories set to 1600 and on a normal day eat just below that. I only pay attention to the carbs (try to stay under 50), protein and fibre (always way over). My exercise is lacking lately. Went for a walk at lunch today and plan to go to the gym tonight where I will do the treadmill and elyptical for 30-45 mins and some weights.

I definately do think it is a lifestyle and I love the food I prepare. It's just one I find myself frustrated with at the moment and I think I got it in my head there could be something better. (It's hard to ignore the gazillion bits of advice out there that "this" is the way to lose weight and not like "that").

You are both right, it is a matter of remembering what works and doing that. So, no nanners and toast for this girl... but I can console myself with Bacon and cheese and get back on track .

kiramaniac

I came across an MFP post last week, that linked to this article / post. Within that article is a spreadsheet tool for setting calories.

In Place of a Road Map:
Article:
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/974888-in-place-of-a-road-map-2k13

Spreadsheet:
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheet/ccc?key=0Amt7QBR9-c6MdGVTbGswLUUzUHNVVUlNSW9wZWloeUE

I found this helpful for myself. I've only lost about 15 pounds in the last 6 months. I downloaded my MFP data for the last year, and found that based on the TDEE in the spreadsheet and my calorie deficit from actual calories consumed, my expected loss is right at.... 15 pounds. I guess I know what's behind my slow losses now!

I put in some rough numbers for you based on what you provided, and you may actually be under-eating. Why is that important? Well, if you are under-eating long term, you may be slowing down your metabolism (see the article for a really good background on this). Anyway - I was making some guesses for some of your info for the spreadsheet, but you may want to take a look yourself. (I'm only 5'5 with 40 pounds to lose, and I'm set for 1550 calories - that's not much less than what you are doing).

I'm not familiar with South Beach - but maybe try another LC Variant to mix it up a bit and re-energize yourself. I'm a big fan of Keto. Bring on the butter and bacon! (If you'd like some info on this, I can point you to a few places).

I find for my sanity, I don't dwell on what I choose not to eat. But I do REVEL on all those things that you don't get to have on low fat diets. Make yourself some yummy raspberry swirl cheesecakes, have that ribeye with some butter on it. Maybe you're ready for Bulletproof Coffee (butter and coconut oil in my coffee? Yes please!) Find some new things to re-energize and refresh you mentally.

Seriously girl - you've GOT this.

lighteningjeanne855

I follow these people on Facebook:
Civilized Caveman Cooking Creations
Diet Doctor
Ditch the What
DJFoodie
Edify

These folks send out great information to my email:
livinlavidalowcarb.com
marksdailyapple.com
Paleohacks.com--this site has forums to cover ALL questions

On youTube, there is a channel, AncestryFoundations. These videos
will help you understand the principals of Paleo.
The "Eenfeldt" videos are from interviews conducted by a Swedish diet doctor
with the great thinkers of the Paleo movement.

Knowledge is power.
I hope something from this list will 'click' with you, and put you back on track.

Best Wishes!

jayrudq

I feel your pain. I had always had such success with Low Carb and Atikins. Ate what I wanted, lots of fat, frankenfood, and still lost, or maintained my weight. Then it all changed...I am now doing calorie counting. And adding a few of the carb-rich foods that I never ate before with quite a bit of luck. I am very careful about my protein/carb ratio..it has to be at least 3:1 - the higher the better. I eat low carb breads and wraps sparingly, but they are part of my diet. So are apples, pears, and grapes but ALWAYS in addition to lean protein. For the most part, I stay away from the sugar alcohols, but occasionally eat them, or sugar.
As far as other carbs, beans and lentils I ignore the carb count - great low calorie soups with lots of protein. Same with veggies. I still avoid potatoes and rice. Use corn sparingly. They are just triggers for me. So is most snack food. I just have muddled along, watching the scale everyday and trying to figure out what works and doesn't for me. And I only binge on those foods that have always been as issue for me: potato chips, crackers, chinese food. Still binge on them if I have the chance

I wish you the best of luck. Don't give up. Sometimes it just takes mixing things up a couple of times to get where you need to go.

JanetLynnJudy

Regarding that you feel like your exercise is lacking. I found it helpful for myself to set aside time every single day that is only for exercising. I made a no excuses no exceptions deal with myself that no matter what is going on in my life, I make this time for myself (sometimes it takes some doing with visitors, travel, long work days, etc. but there's always something that I can do). One I got used to this routine it's just a natural habit and not a big deal.

Some people do very well having rest days, but I found for myself that it would be a slippery slope because if I felt like not going I would just say that I was going to make that day my rest day instead, but then when my actual rest day came instead of making up for lost time I would skip that day too and so on ...

So I decided to make this every day commitment and I haven't missed a day since December 26th 2012 . I'll be honest and say that there's some days I feel like I'm phoning it in and on days I'm sick or sore I'll do something easier like ride my exercise bike at a leisurely pace, but I also have gained this mindset that either way, I will be setting this time aside so I should make it worth my time. I know that every single day I'm at least making some meaningful step towards my goal (even if just a small step). I think it's essential to have lots of back-up plans and options for this type of every day goal to be successful, so I keep it pretty non-specific for that reason. I don't want to put myself in a situation where I'm making a daily goal that could be thwarted by a circumstance outside my control (like weather, the gym being closed, muscle soreness, etc.) so I have to have things I can do in all of these different circumstances.

I recall at some point reading about "Jerry Seinfeld's Productivity Secret" http://lifehacker.com/281626/jerry-seinfelds-productivity-secret and thinking that it's simple and that I could do that. Now if I can just learn to apply it to other aspects of my life ...

dyannajoy

you are 6 feet tall and only 1500 calories!! yikes, try eating at least 1800 and see what happens. I would think even 2000, especially if you are exercising. I think you might just be HUNGRY! :flowerforyou: