I lost my partner
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epiphany29
Posts: 122 Member
It is with a heavy heart that I write this. I am hoping that as I do it will allow me to heal some.
I had a 7 year old TB mare named Willow. She was the first mare I ever got along with and she was as sweet as they come. Seriously, I bought a 5 y/o green horse because of this sweet personality. When I met her I actually was going to see a gelding her owner was selling, but he and I weren't a fit at all. I had been out of riding for too long and he had no willingness to be patient with me figuring myself out again. Willow was a different story. I hadn't planned on seeing or trying her out, but her owner talked me into it. First thing she did was reach out to me to say hi with her nose and then politely waited for some attention. She was ridiculously attentive to her owner, looking for guidance and direction while she was warming her up. I rode her, man was she green, but she didn't care that I was banging on her mouth and couldn't remember how to direct her to halt from my seat. After we took her in and untacked her. Her owner put her in her stall and left the door open while she went into the tack room to put stuff away and get her dinner ready. Willow just stood there and looked out the door. (We could continue to do this till the day she was put to sleep, she never left her stall without permission). I just couldn't get over how focused she was on the person she was partnering with so I bought her.
Now, this is not the ideal thing for someone getting back into riding after 20 years and changing disciplines from hunter to dressage, but we had a wonderful time. She came along well. My trainer thought she was very smart. I could take her on trails and she would almost fall asleep she would be so happy and relaxed there. A little over a year ago we started to have some issues with her shaking her head while riding. At first we thought she was having issues with contact, so bit changes, and other things were tried. Nothing seemed to help. Her gentle calm personality changed and she was much more anxious. 3 Vets, including a boarded surgeon and a chiropractor/acupuncturist could not localize her problem nor do much for it. In Septemer of this year she finally showed a lameness. This was worked up and we found some problems in her hocks which were injected. For 3 weeks she did great. Back to relaxed and calm, no head shaking/tossing, working through her back. I never actually got back on her because she was so out of shape. Then the toe dragging started again. Over the next several weeks her lameness returned and worsened. By the end she could barely put her left hind down at all. It would break your heart to watch her shuffle her way around.
She is in heaven and at peace. My heart is broken. I feel that in so many ways I failed her not figuring out what was wrong and fixing it. I feel lost without my exercise buddy and that wonderful animal who was always so in tune with me and responded to the slightest body language. She taught me so much about horse language and communication. She taught me patience. She showed me the joy of accomplishment when we both managed to get it right. She showed me how to be strong and lead without being mean and forceful. I will never forget her. I just wish she had more to teach me and we had more time together.
RIP Willow.
I had a 7 year old TB mare named Willow. She was the first mare I ever got along with and she was as sweet as they come. Seriously, I bought a 5 y/o green horse because of this sweet personality. When I met her I actually was going to see a gelding her owner was selling, but he and I weren't a fit at all. I had been out of riding for too long and he had no willingness to be patient with me figuring myself out again. Willow was a different story. I hadn't planned on seeing or trying her out, but her owner talked me into it. First thing she did was reach out to me to say hi with her nose and then politely waited for some attention. She was ridiculously attentive to her owner, looking for guidance and direction while she was warming her up. I rode her, man was she green, but she didn't care that I was banging on her mouth and couldn't remember how to direct her to halt from my seat. After we took her in and untacked her. Her owner put her in her stall and left the door open while she went into the tack room to put stuff away and get her dinner ready. Willow just stood there and looked out the door. (We could continue to do this till the day she was put to sleep, she never left her stall without permission). I just couldn't get over how focused she was on the person she was partnering with so I bought her.
Now, this is not the ideal thing for someone getting back into riding after 20 years and changing disciplines from hunter to dressage, but we had a wonderful time. She came along well. My trainer thought she was very smart. I could take her on trails and she would almost fall asleep she would be so happy and relaxed there. A little over a year ago we started to have some issues with her shaking her head while riding. At first we thought she was having issues with contact, so bit changes, and other things were tried. Nothing seemed to help. Her gentle calm personality changed and she was much more anxious. 3 Vets, including a boarded surgeon and a chiropractor/acupuncturist could not localize her problem nor do much for it. In Septemer of this year she finally showed a lameness. This was worked up and we found some problems in her hocks which were injected. For 3 weeks she did great. Back to relaxed and calm, no head shaking/tossing, working through her back. I never actually got back on her because she was so out of shape. Then the toe dragging started again. Over the next several weeks her lameness returned and worsened. By the end she could barely put her left hind down at all. It would break your heart to watch her shuffle her way around.
She is in heaven and at peace. My heart is broken. I feel that in so many ways I failed her not figuring out what was wrong and fixing it. I feel lost without my exercise buddy and that wonderful animal who was always so in tune with me and responded to the slightest body language. She taught me so much about horse language and communication. She taught me patience. She showed me the joy of accomplishment when we both managed to get it right. She showed me how to be strong and lead without being mean and forceful. I will never forget her. I just wish she had more to teach me and we had more time together.
RIP Willow.
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Replies
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I am so sorry for your loss. She sounds like a wonderful mare and I am sure she loved her time with you. I lost my horse of 28 years in the spring of 2012 and I still cry when I think about him. Just remember that you surely did the right thing for her. From my point of view a life of pain isn't how a horse should live and was the last thing I wanted for my guy. My heart breaks for you.0
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I am so, so sorry, Epiphany. What an enormous loss.0
