For Today Mar 7th

GrokRockStar

“Those things are dearest to us that have cost us most.” Michel de Montaigne

“For today: There is nothing in the world I would take in exchange for what I have in OA. I go to any length to keep it”

Well that is a powerful statement! OA is truly a program of action (meetings, steps, outreach), but lately I’ve been guilty of not being fully committed when I feel that it’s inconvenient for me. I hate to admit it, but it’s true. I do take it one day at a time, sometimes 1 hour at a time. The serenity prayer helps me get through it and allows me to get outside of myself. I think I’ll go for a hike and meditation tomorrow. It’s beautiful in southern Cali and I plan on taking advantage of it.
I hope you all are having a great day!

CC

jellis2014

You are not alone! My commitment for certain things also seems to decrease a bit when it's not convenient. Realizing that makes it easier to be aware of what I'm doing and why, and to prevent me from having issues.

Enjoy the nice weather! I'm on the east coast and it's still winter here

Laurel0724

DITTO! I know what works best for me.....

Early morning prayer / meditation / working on a step question / emailing my food for the day

Talking to my sponsor - reading my answer

However, just this week, my sponsor and I realized that our relationship wasn't working. If I'm REALLY honest, I'm flaky. I am self-will run-riot a lot of the time. I'll be "good" for several days, then forget my breakfast, or that we are going to someone's house for dinner, etc. For me, my program has to work within those parameters. For the first time ever, it is!

My "bottom line" abstinence is that I'm completely, 100% honest with my sponsor about every thing I put in my mouth. Having said that, 95% I do not eat sugar or white flour. However, there are those days that I do. If I have to "start my abstinence over" every time I eat sugar, to me, that seems no different than every diet I was ever on and just as demoralizing. Somehow, this time in program, I'm looking at it differently. I'm seeing the "big picture."

I'm SO SO grateful for my recovery! I'm so grateful for that which I am willing to work it and for those fellows in the program. I pray for the willingness to keep putting one foot in front of the other, without feeling overly deprived. One thing I need to keep reminding myself is to use every tool, every day, to the best of my ability. (I've added an additional tool, however, and that is exercise.) When I do this, my head stays in the game and my focus is on the program, others, newcomers, service, and not on my weight.

I was SHOCKED today when I got on the scale and I had lost 1.5 lbs. It has to be the program - but it is scary. My food WASN'T clean at all. In fact, I ate See's candy (my downfall) two days in a row - and a lot of it?! That is way too frightening.

It's a good thing, for me, that this online discussion is available. Especially when meetings aren't "convenient" to my schedule. Gratefully, the weekends they are.....

Hugs and blessings to you all!

GrokRockStar

Laurel, I agree with placing honesty in the forefront of recovery. I only work with a sponsor when going through the steps, other than that, i do not use a sponsor as a regular tool. I do make outreach calls occasionally though. When I first got into program I called in my menu every day, weighed and measured, and cut out sugar, until these things themselves became an obsession. I have since found what works for me in the scope of the program and have been able to stay abstinent because of it.